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Ex usually hates social media but now he's very active on it. Was I the problem?


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So my ex usually complained me being active or an addict on social media and kept saying himself of being less on it, which was also part of the reason why he broke up with me. But after we broke up, he is always active on Facebook and Instagram, even Whatsapp than he used to before. Now he’s being online more often on Facebook than he used to after the breakup and more checking on Instagram Stories as well. And recently he’s following some pretty girls from the city he used to live (he’s an expat and used to live in Jakarta for 5 years), including an influencer with fake lips and such, where he always bragged about how he dislike them. I am so confused did he really changed so much after the break up or was I really the problem or it was just an excuse to loose interest in me? I don’t understand why or how he can change instantly after just a month of break up? 

Edited by Wenyyyy
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Does it matter? 

People change, or actually become the person they wanted to be before they broke up.  In any case, why are you stalking his social media accouts?  What he does now is irrelevant.

All I can assume is he is bored, or looking for some new women to date.  Or, he's already connected with new women and is conversing with them through SM chat functions.

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10 minutes ago, Trail Blazer said:

Does it matter? 

People change, or actually become the person they wanted to be before they broke up.  In any case, why are you stalking his social media accouts?  What he does now is irrelevant.

All I can assume is he is bored, or looking for some new women to date.  Or, he's already connected with new women and is conversing with them through SM chat

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Well it hurts me when this was part of the reason he broke up with me and seeing him now being more active than I am, I just couldn’t believe my eyes especially the break up was not long ago.

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6 minutes ago, Wenyyyy said:

Well it hurts me when this was part of the reason he broke up with me and seeing him now being more active than I am, I just couldn’t believe my eyes especially the break up was not long ago.

I suspect that his breaking up with you had very little to do with how frequently you used Facebook.

It can be annoying when a partner is glued to their phone all the time, but that reason alone is not one to break up with someone over.

 

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1 minute ago, Trail Blazer said:

I suspect that his breaking up with you had very little to do with how frequently you used Facebook.

It can be annoying when a partner is glued to their phone all the time, but that reason alone is not one to break up with someone over.

 

Well when he broke up with me he said this behaviour of me being active on social media reflects him of his younger self. But yeah this was not the main reason but part of the reason of break up but he said it’s important to him.

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Do yourself a favor & disconnect from him on all platforms.  Do not be his friend.  For your sanity it would be better if you block him so you can't see any of his on line behavior.

I have no idea why he said what he said to you or why he's acting the way he is now.  I can speculate that in his opinion, when you were in a relationship he expected you to pay attention to him not social media but now that he's single during a lockdown with social media being one of the only ways we all have to connect he's active.  Once he finds a new GF, he will probably use it less again because he values in person interaction over social media. 

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josedelamuerte

Lets assume the worst ideas you may have in mind are all true - he lied about not liking social media just to make you feel bad, and it was a phony made-up excuse to dump you, and you never even got the real reason why he dumped you, and he's an ass for being a liar and not giving you closure. Now take a step back and ask yourself - "how is this train of thought conducive to my well-being?".

It's not. You're just using bits of social media cyberstalking to work yourself up about a relationship that's over. Be kind to yourself.

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He's your ex.  You're not with him anymore.  So stop looking at who he is following on social media.  You are wasting time worrying about things that don't matter now.  

And I highly doubt that the reason he broke up with you was because you were a "social media addict."  Maybe that was an excuse that he gave.

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