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Why do married men want a single affair partner to get pregnant?


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22 minutes ago, misspalmy said:

He wanted me pregnant. I told him I wasn’t on anything. He wanted to be father again. Maybe he just wants be a dad?? 

And you chose to have sex with him. You have just as much responsibility here as him. Unless it was rape of course. 

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4 minutes ago, Amethyst68 said:

And you chose to have sex with him. You have just as much responsibility here as him. Unless it was rape of course. 

No he didn’t rape me. Both consenting 

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12 hours ago, Wiseman2 said:

So in theory, Mr Unzipped's wife could end up paying for his 3 kids.

I'm not sure where you are based, but this is not the case I'm every country. The responsibility lies with the parents of the child and their spouse's income cannot be part of determining the child support payment.

 

 

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9 hours ago, misspalmy said:

I didn’t mind 

You don't mind agreeing to be pregnant and having children he wants, but doesn't financially support. 

He supports the first, not the other 2. Did you question him on why you should have a third, when he wasn't paying for the second? Or is it that you are wealthy enough independently to raise your kids, so money isn't an issue.

Maybe he feels like more of a man getting you pregnant all the time. Showing his masculinity in a warped kind of way. Leaving numerous kids on earth as some kind of legacy. It's very strange. 

Another thought is he knows pregnancy, childbirth and the early years can be difficult and wants you to continue facing this situation. It can be difficult while in a committed loving relationship, with a supportive partner/parent....yet you don't have that and he's still happy for you to keep going through this on your own. 

What does that say about him to you?

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1 hour ago, sandylee1 said:

I'm not sure where you are based, but this is not the case I'm every country. The responsibility lies with the parents of the child and their spouse's income cannot be part of determining the child support payment.

 

 

Correct. The spouses income is not a factor however you misread and misquoted.

If in theory, he stops working, they can go after his other income.

But a moot point. She doesn't want support and his wife is already babysitting for this mistress's child.

So it seems they are one big happy polygamous family.

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Starswillshine
22 minutes ago, pepperbird2 said:

I feel really sorry for the kids. What a messed up family life.
Come on OP, you're better than this!

Kids who are siblings and first cousins at the same time.... from their dads' mistress. 

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18 hours ago, misspalmy said:

He wanted me pregnant. I told him I wasn’t on anything. He wanted to be father again. Maybe he just wants be a dad?? 

Nah. Not if he doesn't pay child support for all of them. 

 

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Maybe I'm wrong, but didn't you say before that you have children by two different MM? Were they brothers? I'm pretty confident you wrote that here some time ago

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On 1/31/2021 at 11:43 PM, misspalmy said:

Maybe he just wants be a dad?? 

Donating sperm and being a father are two very different things. He sounds more like the former, out to prove he’s spawned more viable offspring than his brother, so has greater claim on the body of the woman who bore them. 
 

The real question is why you are passively allowing these losers to use you in this way, to assert their fragile masculinity. Do you have no real achievements in your own life you can be proud of, that you can draw your identity from? 

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On 1/29/2021 at 11:31 PM, misspalmy said:

Do I’m on my 3nd child to him. His wife knows about the other two kids. 

How do you support these children? 

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Please go on some birth control MM is never leaving his wife, please don't bring anymore lives into this dysfunction. The more kids you have the less chance you have of meeting someone new who can give you what you need.  You need to file for child support, go for therapy and figure out what you want  . 

I recently terminated a pregnancy (it was As) it wasn't an easy decision but I thought it best for the existing children. 

No I didn't want bring a new life into a clusterf*** arrangement we are now NC almost 6 weeks and I feel much better nearly out of the fog. 

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OP,

Is this really the sort of life you want for you and your kids?  Don't all of you deserve some peace of mind ? As it stands now, you're tied to those two brothers for the next how many years because you have kids with them. Is that really what you want, this sort of continuing chaos?
Can you take a step back and look at your situation objectively. What is it this gets gets out of you being pregnant? He gets to feel like the big man cock of the walk while you raise his kids?

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Having BPD is not a reason that you can't have a relationship with a man who isn't married. Many people with BPD have normal relationships. 

I don't know what childhood issues you went through, but by you having all your children by married men, you could just creating issues for them in the future. 

Hopefully you want better for them than what you currently have. 

 

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Was pondering the topic title. Wondering if 

"Why would a single affair want to get pregnant with a married man ?"

Would be something to think about.

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