Wife decided to divorce me after 20 years of happy marriage

[trident_2020]

16 minutes ago, World Peace Guy said:

 Divorce is never really truly divorce, especially when kids are involved. We'll always be married, in God's eyes. It is more of a transformation to an open relationship. Agreeing to see other people, kind of thing. I know that sounds odd, but that is kind of how it is in reality.

What planet are you on? It's great that you're trying to save it but I'm thinking it's not Earth.

 

[World Peace Guy]

4 hours ago, Trail Blazer said:

Because, put simply, charity starts at home.  I can't possibly fathom how one person is going to "save" seven billion people.  That's what I find unimaginable.

Bill Gates has given it a mighty shot and yet, despite his enormous resources, has struggled to make a dent whilst garnering a lot of detractors in the process.

If you think you can do it, though, good for you!  Just don't expect many people to buy in to your plan.  I'd hazard a guess that your wife didn't, I'm afraid.

It does not do any good to have all the money in the world, if you don't have a plan, if you don't know what to do with it. Money is not what will save mankind.A little money is needed, yes, but money itself is just worthless paper. Without a plan, it is nothing! Everything intelligent actions starts first with a plan. You don't just start throwing money around, with out any kind of plan, and expect success. So don't assume Bill Gates has any better ability to save mankind, than a bum on the street. Without a plan, he's just as incapable as a bum on the street. In fact, the reason he gets so many people opposed to him, is the fact that he is doing far more harm than good. Bill Gates is like having your 2 year old child, pushing buttons on the keyboard of your computer. I don't know about you, but that scares me, 'cause you don't know what will get messed up or if you'll be able to fix it! He's got massive power, but he doesn't know what he's doing. A classic example, is the guy who had 40,000 elephants killed, 'cause he thought they were the cause of desertification in Africa. Later on, he discovered, the elephants were the solution, not the problem, so OPPS! But, he already pushed that button, so... 

Like I said, just about every new invention seems impossible to people, until the inventor proves it can be done. Only the inventor knows how to do it, and believes it is possible. This is true of every invention. World Peace is no different.

[littleblackheart]

Thank you for clarifying.

Did you meet her online while you were in the USA, and she was in Ukraine? Do you think that maybe what she wanted was to leave Ukraine and live in the USA and is very frustrated at how long the visa procedure seems to take? Just putting it out there as a suggestion.

It really reads as though you are actually US-based yourself, working there for years at a time and organising world peace stuff, while she's waiting on an elusive visa to the US back home.

I appreciate you want to travel to Africa as a sort of new prophet (I think?) for people of all religions and none, which is very inclusive on principle, though I mostly wondered what the divorce would actually mean to you in practical terms? As in, how will you see your kids?

 

[World Peace Guy]

As I said, this is a subject that upsets a lot of people. Rather than wanting someone to try to prevent WW3, many get upset, but I seem to have gotten more understanding than I expected.

Edited February 6, 2021 by World Peace Guy

[Wiseman2]

28 minutes ago, World Peace Guy said:

She's a full time mother, so it is really nothing at all like being a single mother. When I was around, to her, I was just another mouth to feed, a burden on her.

Who supports your wife and children financially? 

[World Peace Guy]

Just now, Wiseman2 said:

Who supports your wife and children financially? 

Me, obviously. I work a full time job for money, and work on world peace on the side.

[littleblackheart]

14 minutes ago, World Peace Guy said:

As I said, this is a subject that upsets a lot of people. Rather than wanting someone to try to prevent WW3, many get upset, but I seem to have gotten more understanding than I expected.

Good luck with it, World Peace Guy. Sincerely.

(The divorce and seeing your kids part, I mean).

[World Peace Guy]

3 minutes ago, littleblackheart said:

Thank you for clarifying.

Did you meet her online while you were in the USA, and she was in Ukraine? Do you think that maybe what she wanted was to leave Ukraine and live in the USA and is very frustrated at how long the visa procedure seems to take? Just putting it out there as a suggestion.

It really reads as though you are actually US-based yourself, working there for years at a time and organising world peace stuff, while she's waiting on an elusive visa to the US back home.

I appreciate you want to travel to Africa as a sort of new prophet (I think?) for people of all religions and none, which is very inclusive on principle, though I mostly wondered what the divorce would actually mean to you in practical terms? As in, how will you see your kids?

 

Yes, I was in the USA. Yes, she probably wanted to meet a guy from USA and live there. She didn't like it though, except the shopping. She did like the shopping. She was kind of discussed with the hospital though (our daughter was born in USA). We did the visa process twice, and both times she went to the USA for a short period. 

Not sure how i'll see the kids. Not very often, I'm sure. There is internet though.

Being in a nation where no one speaks your native language is very difficult. My wife complains that I don't speak Ukrainian, or even Russian very well, and thinks I should have learned it more in 20 years. I keep telling her though, many people live in USA for 20 years without speaking English at all. Being able to learn a language, requires a talkative personality, and I'm a very shy non-talkative personality. Even so, I've tried very hard to learn, and I think my skill is pretty impressive. It just feels like baby talk to me.

So basically, I really don't see staying in Ukraine as an option.

[littleblackheart]

2 minutes ago, World Peace Guy said:

Being able to learn a language, requires a talkative personality, and I'm a very shy non-talkative personality. Even so, I've tried very hard to learn, and I think my skill is pretty impressive

No doubt your skill is impressive and wouldn't dream of suggesting otherwise.

The bolded part: would it not be a bit of a hindrance for your African prophet mission?

[World Peace Guy]

34 minutes ago, littleblackheart said:

No doubt your skill is impressive and wouldn't dream of suggesting otherwise.

The bolded part: would it not be a bit of a hindrance for your African prophet mission?

A picture paints a thousand words. An example or prototype paints millions of words. People don't learn much from the words, they learn from the old "seeing is believing" thing. They need to see proof that this new system of society will work and will end poverty and bring World Peace. No amount of talking will do that. So, not so much of a hindrance as you might thing, and possibly even a benefit. A great talker may focus his efforts on talk related stuff, which may go no where.

[lana-banana]

What is this "new system", exactly, and why do you think anyone in Africa would be more receptive to it than anyone at home?

[littleblackheart]

32 minutes ago, World Peace Guy said:

A picture paints a thousand words. An example or prototype paints millions of words. People don't learn much from the words, they learn from the old "seeing is believing" thing. They need to see proof that this new system of society will work and will end poverty and bring World Peace. No amount of talking will do that. So, not so much of a hindrance as you might thing, and possibly even a benefit. A great talker may focus his efforts on talk related stuff, which may go no where.

Well, it sounds as though you have it all figured out. Will be thinking of World Peace Guy off of Loveshack.org when World Peace finally descends upon us in the next few months or so, all the way from the whole continent of Africa, whenever you've fine-tuned your system.

Meanwhile, you really need to think of a strategy on the kids / divorce thing. That seems like a more pressing issue right now, to be entirely honest.

[basil67]

3 hours ago, World Peace Guy said:

People ALWAYS say that every new ideas or invention is impossible, and then someone does it. You can't assume someone is "delusional", just because they try to do something no one else has done before. That would make every inventor "delusional". Every inventor tries to do what no one else had done before. Anyway, you can not truly believe in God's love, without believing in World Peace. Most assume that God's plan is to kill us all in some kind of "harvest", but that is not really love, is it? Nor is love judging us. God wants us all to be happy, and that means World Peace. That is God's plan.

I wasn't asking what people in general think or what you think of their thoughts, I was asking what your wife thinks  But I take it that she does think you're delusional.  

If she's got no faith in you being rational, then it makes sense that she has chosen to move on.

[trident_2020]

Just now, basil67 said:

 I was asking what your wife thinks  But I take it that she does think you're delusional.  

If she's got no faith in you being rational, then it makes sense that she has chosen to move on.

This would appear to sum up the entire relationship dynamic.

Reminds me of when that guy was posting on billboards all over the country that the world was coming to an end and a lot of people believed it and they quit their jobs and sold their homes and bought motorhomes and headed East for salvation or whatever it was and then nothing happened and they had nowhere to go because all the sane people they left behind wanted nothing to do with them.

 

[World Peace Guy]

8 hours ago, lana-banana said:

What is this "new system", exactly, and why do you think anyone in Africa would be more receptive to it than anyone at home?

Can't explain it "exactly", people have limited ability to understand new ideas. It is kind of like trying to make a blue print showing how to make a 3D object with only text, no drawing. It would take an enormous amount of text, and if you don't understand all of it exactly, you're lost and won't understand it at all. That is why inventors can never get anyone to understand and see the vision of their ideas. 

I can only give a basic simple description. It is a lot like the system that Jesus' Apostles created. The love of money is the root of all evil. This system eliminates the love of money. When money is used to motivate people, it becomes reward based training, such as we use on animals. Rewarding greed, results in more greed. This is the root of all evil. 

As for why Africa, it is because I am fairly poor myself. To start a new system of society, requires getting people to do some things, without them understanding why. This can only be done by using money. Nobody does things because it is the right thing to do, if they don't understand why. When they don't understand why, the only way to get them to do it, is to use money. No amount of explaining or text will get them to understand why, so money is the only option.

I've actually already got about 100 or so people in Africa very interested. They are very receptive.

[basil67]

14 minutes ago, World Peace Guy said:

Can't explain it "exactly", people have limited ability to understand new ideas. It is kind of like trying to make a blue print showing how to make a 3D object with only text, no drawing. It would take an enormous amount of text, and if you don't understand all of it exactly, you're lost and won't understand it at all. That is why inventors can never get anyone to understand and see the vision of their ideas.   

If you can't describe what you're doing and sell us on the idea, why would those who would benefit from it trust or believe you?

Also, it's rubbish that inventors can't get anyone to understand a new idea.   I will grant you that in the early days of modern science, it was more difficult (germ theory for instance), but we are now well and truly in a scientific age.  If it takes biology skills or engineering skills, economic theory....whatever those who have those skills will understand and get excited.  I doubt that you're the only one in the whole world with the particular skill set required for whatever it is.   

[World Peace Guy]

8 hours ago, basil67 said:

I wasn't asking what people in general think or what you think of their thoughts, I was asking what your wife thinks  But I take it that she does think you're delusional.  

If she's got no faith in you being rational, then it makes sense that she has chosen to move on.

 

8 hours ago, trident_2020 said:

This would appear to sum up the entire relationship dynamic.

Reminds me of when that guy was posting on billboards all over the country that the world was coming to an end and a lot of people believed it and they quit their jobs and sold their homes and bought motorhomes and headed East for salvation or whatever it was and then nothing happened and they had nowhere to go because all the sane people they left behind wanted nothing to do with them.

 

Anyone who uses the word "delusional" is far less capable of a lasting relationship than normal. It is basically like saying everyone who doesn't think exactly like you is crazy and does not deserve respect. Does my wife do this? Yes, she does, but that is not an excuse. That is absolutely wrong behavior. I can only give her understanding for this, I can not fix her.

One could also very easily say that anyone who thinks the world is not coming to an end is "delusional". I would bet that you people are totally unaware of the fact that in a time of peace, a 5 star general asked the President to nuke/kill every man, woman, and child in China, and a different 5 star general asked the President of the USA to nuke/kill every man, woman, and child in the Soviet Union. Yet this is public record. You are probably also unaware of what Operation Giant lance was, sending 18 bombers loaded with nukes to the Soviet boarder to "scare" the Soviets. Something we consider child like intelligence. I should point out, that if a regular person points a gun at someone, he goes to jail, because it could result in someone getting killed. I could go on and on about the extremely dangerous things that have happened in the past, in the short period of time, which we have released documents for. These things are always kept top secret for many years.

I never said that I am 100% sure my plan will work. Truth is, even if I was only 1% sure it would work, I'd still consider worth dedicating my life to, and risking my family for. Even a 1% chance it will work, would make it equivalent to saving 70 million people.

The point is, you don't do the research. You have no information. You just say "your delusional". That is extremely bad for you and your relationships. When people get married, they promise to love, for better or worse, in sickness and in health. The use of the term "delusional" is breaking this promise. You can't love without respect. Judging people is wrong and harmful for you and others.

Having a long lasting marriage is very simple, in the words needed to say how to do it. All you need is love. Likewise, you could say that World Peace is also very simple in the words needed to say how to do it. All you need is love. The problem is, people don't understand what love is or how to create it. I suppose we really should have schools to teach what love is, but it would be extremely difficult to market it to the people, to get them to understand the need.

[World Peace Guy]

21 minutes ago, basil67 said:

If you can't describe what you're doing and sell us on the idea, why would those who would benefit from it trust or believe you?

Also, it's rubbish that inventors can't get anyone to understand a new idea.   I will grant you that in the early days of modern science, it was more difficult (germ theory for instance), but we are now well and truly in a scientific age.  If it takes biology skills or engineering skills, economic theory....whatever those who have those skills will understand and get excited.  I doubt that you're the only one in the whole world with the particular skill set required for whatever it is.   

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Diffusion_of_innovations

[basil67]

The theory you just linked to doesn't suggest that other experts in the relevant field can't understand or see potential in a great new idea.  Rather, it talks about the journey of the product from those who do understand at a high level, through the early adapters and finally to society at large.   The invention of the Personal Computer very much took this journey.   A group of boffins could all see potential and create the product.  Early adapters buy versions in an early stage.  And the rest of us pick it up as it becomes more mainstream.  My first boyfriend and also my husband are both tech guys and as such, were both early adapters, while I couldn't see the potential.  But that , as a non tech-head couldn't see the potential doesn't mean that everyone else couldn't understand.  

A significant part of this Diffusion of Innovations relies on communication.  And this is what I've been trying to say to you: if you can't begin to communicate what it is, then it can't possibly get off the ground.  You need to be able to sell it and sell it well.   Yes, it may well be over the head of many, but like the PC boffins, there will be someone here (and there) who gets it and gets excited.  

 

Edited February 7, 2021 by basil67
clarity

[Wiseman2]

3 hours ago, World Peace Guy said:

, people have limited ability to understand new ideas. .

To start a new system of society, requires getting people to do some things, without them understanding why

I disagree that people are simply too stupid to understand you.

With respect, this sounds more like what Jim Jones did. Like a cult.

[trident_2020]

5 hours ago, World Peace Guy said:

 

Anyone who uses the word "delusional" is far less capable of a lasting relationship than normal. It is basically like saying everyone who doesn't think exactly like you is crazy and does not deserve respect. Does my wife do this? Yes, she does, but that is not an excuse. That is absolutely wrong behavior. I can only give her understanding for this, I can not fix her.

It's all your wife's fault that she cannot maintain a relationship with you because she sees you as delusional and doesn't respect you.

Got it. She doesn't want to be fixed so that sees sees things your way. Most sane people don't. Trust me on this one.

 

 

[littleblackheart]

17 minutes ago, trident_2020 said:

It's all your wife's fault that she cannot maintain a relationship with you because she sees you as delusional and doesn't respect you.

Got it. She doesn't want to be fixed so that sees sees things your way. Most sane people don't. Trust me on this one.

 

 

Actually, having your partner's support on even the craziest of ideas is a healthy sign of compatibility in a relationship, and can even help keep you grounded.

I personally don't fault WPG for dreaming big; the intention is lovely, if the realisation looks a bit improbable (apologies for the sarcastic tone of my previous post @World Peace Guy- it was uncalled for); it's just that he and his wife have

 irreconciliable imcompatibilities in their worldviews and characters, and a ton of stubbling blocks (visa, work issues, money issues, language barrier) neither of whom have been able to address successfully together for the sake of their family.

 

Edited February 7, 2021 by littleblackheart

[jspice]

11 hours ago, World Peace Guy said:

Can't explain it "exactly", people have limited ability to understand new ideas. It is kind of like trying to make a blue print showing how to make a 3D object with only text, no drawing. It would take an enormous amount of text, and if you don't understand all of it exactly, you're lost and won't understand it at all. That is why inventors can never get anyone to understand and see the vision of their ideas. 

I can only give a basic simple description. It is a lot like the system that Jesus' Apostles created. The love of money is the root of all evil. This system eliminates the love of money. When money is used to motivate people, it becomes reward based training, such as we use on animals. Rewarding greed, results in more greed. This is the root of all evil. 

As for why Africa, it is because I am fairly poor myself. To start a new system of society, requires getting people to do some things, without them understanding why. This can only be done by using money. Nobody does things because it is the right thing to do, if they don't understand why. When they don't understand why, the only way to get them to do it, is to use money. No amount of explaining or text will get them to understand why, so money is the only option.

I've actually already got about 100 or so people in Africa very interested. They are very receptive.

So you’re going to Africa because Africa is poor? 🤣

Of the 10 fastest growing economies in the world, 6 are African countries. African people aren’t stupid, as your post implies. They also don’t need saving  

Save your own country or save your wife’s country. 
Even if this is a troll post, you’re offensive . 

 

 

[World Peace Guy]

It took many years for people, even experts in the field, to accept Darwin's theory. It took hundreds of years, maybe thousands of years, for people to accept that meteors are rocks from space. It took thousands of years for people, even experts, to accept that the earth is round, and that it orbits around the sun, even though thousands of years ago someone made a mechanical computer, now believed to predict eclipses, based entirely on the planets orbiting around the sun, so whoever built it, knew way back then. Yet, 500 years ago, people were still trying to convince people that the world was round.

So I'm not going to continue replying to this comments about people accepting new ideas. It is just a waste of time. I've provided proof with Diffusion of Innovations. That's enough. If my wife wanted to talk about it.

I'd talk with her, because our relationship is worth talking about. She never saw it as something worth talking about. If you add up all the time we talked about that stuff, over our entire 20 years together, it would probably come to about an hour or two. No where near what a person who considers a relationship to have value, would spend. If you love someone, you place a high value on the relationship. You make that person a priority. You spend time on that person, when needed. This is something, that I've very rarely seen from her. 

I understand that you people don't love me, and so to you, it is acceptable to disrespect me and think me a fool. This, however, is not ok for a spouse. 

It doesn't matter what a person's dreams are. If you want a happy marriage, you are duty bound to accept and respect that person's dreams. If you have any problem with that, you need to at least talk with that person, and try to understand. You should not get married, if you are not willing to love the whole person. 

This doesn't mean that a couple will agree on everything. Disagreement is fine, but disrespect is not.

Anyway, just because someone does not think the same way as you, does not make the other person an idiot. Thinking that the other person is an idiot, makes you an arrogant and a fool.

[trident_2020]

1 minute ago, World Peace Guy said:

If my wife wanted to talk about it.

I'd talk with her, because our relationship is worth talking about. She never saw it as something worth talking about. If you add up all the time we talked about that stuff, over our entire 20 years together, it would probably come to about an hour or two. You make that person a priority. You spend time on that person, when needed. This is something, that I've very rarely seen from her. .

Your wife is a smart woman. I can't help but wonder why she married you in the first place or waited so long to kick you to the curb.