Sunnny Posted March 3, 2021 Share Posted March 3, 2021 Is it wrong for me to break up with my boyfriend due to him being financially irresponsible he lost his job in the beginning of the year he just started working as of me too my boyfriend do not have any kids I have 2 I do not get no help from my ex husband for Christmas I was able to get him what he wanted for Christmas he didn’t get me anything I told him he can make up for it on vday on vday I worked overtime to get him 2 pairs of shoes he waiting until the last minute and got me a candle told me the store ran out of things for his birthday I spent over 100 on him my birthday haven’t came yet but we have had a talk many of times I am not materialistic but I felt I deserve a more thoughtful gift or random things am I wrong for wanting more he tells me he pays rent by himself we calculated our bills and I pay more a month on bills and still can do for him I am wrong for breaking up with him because of his money issues Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted March 3, 2021 Share Posted March 3, 2021 It's not a matter of being right or wrong. It's a matter of how you feel. If you are unhappy, if you feel underestimated, taken for granted, and nothing changes then break up. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
FMW Posted March 3, 2021 Share Posted March 3, 2021 You have the right to break up with anyone for any reason. Don't stay with him for any reason other than you want to be with him. If you're unhappy and feeling resentful, let him go and move on. Link to post Share on other sites
TeddyBundy1993 Posted March 3, 2021 Share Posted March 3, 2021 If it's only for financial irresponsibility you might give it a thought as times are hard already. However if things have been the same always then it's a huge red flag. Dump him. You are not wrong, a little financial security is always required. Also if you ask me he seems to take advantage of you here. But it's my opinion, you should have given a little more information about his age and how long have you been together. Link to post Share on other sites
assertives Posted March 7, 2021 Share Posted March 7, 2021 It's abit hard to tell if he's financially irresponsible just by him losing his job. These are trying times now and everyone is struggling one way or another. That said, it does sound like you are putting in more effort than he is and if gifts are your love language, and he isn't willing to put in the effort despite talking to him about it and setting your expectations, then I would say you should reconsider this relationship. I've seen so many posts on reddit about this issue of gifting where their spouses couldn't be arsed to get anything for their partners despite repeated fights, and communication over the years. They don't get better. If he is like that now, chances are high he'll be like that when the relationship is longer and his efforts wanes. Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted March 7, 2021 Share Posted March 7, 2021 Financial incompatibility is a leading cause of break ups. It will always be a source of contention. Best to cut your losses. You don't need to justify a break up. If you are done, be done. You can't change other people. Link to post Share on other sites
Marc878 Posted March 7, 2021 Share Posted March 7, 2021 Take good look at where he’s going to be in 5 years. Past history is the best predictor of the future. Most will not change IMO. What you’ve got is all you’ll ever have. Link to post Share on other sites
Ruby Slippers Posted March 7, 2021 Share Posted March 7, 2021 I wouldn't be with someone like this. Even in a pandemic, there's always something one can do to earn income - deliver food or groceries, clean houses, whatever. I've managed to be employed my entire working life, one way or another, and wouldn't accept less in a man. Link to post Share on other sites
Miss Spider Posted March 7, 2021 Share Posted March 7, 2021 (edited) It’s not wrong at all. Edited March 7, 2021 by Shortskirtslonglashes Link to post Share on other sites
GeorgiaPeach1 Posted March 8, 2021 Share Posted March 8, 2021 He's basically become your third child. Link to post Share on other sites
Miss Peach Posted March 15, 2021 Share Posted March 15, 2021 (edited) I had something similar happen to me with an unemployed bf during Christmas. If you don't feel good with it then it is wat it is. How is he in other ways? Does he help you with non-financial things like fix up things around your house? Lend you things? Make nice dinners? Watch the kids so you can go out? Etc. I could deal with it in the short term if I felt a guy was giving in other ways. But if he was selfish in other ways and this way I would have second thoughts myself. I've dated a few guys without money but they were at least able to put together a nice picnic and write me a song or something that showed some thought and consideration. Edited March 15, 2021 by Miss Peach Link to post Share on other sites
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