how true is this?

[angel eyes]

i was talking to my uncle the other day and soon we talked about relationships,well he emphasized the fact that if i have sex with my boyfriend he won't marry me because all guys would like to sleep with their girlfriend and is normal but if i give in he would not consider me marriage material.

 

my uncle is a psychologist with an open mind so that shocked me because my boyfriend and i have marriage plans after we graduate from college, i'm an adult not a teenager and i've been sexually intimate with my guy. how true is this?

[?]

I personally think it's true to a little extent ... sometimes guy's feeling fade FAST once they sleep with the girl ... whether or not they're married to her or not ... so it's just a risk you take ... i personally wouldn't marry someone without sleeping with them first - to be sure that that isn't all they want from me ... (i think often guys don't even realize themselves that that's all they want)

 

just my opinion though!! i hope tony gives a more prof. one!

[Ed]

What your Uncle is referring to is the old saying, "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?". There are many other sayings that express this same point.

 

What he is suggesting though, is that:

 

1) Men only want sex from women.

 

2) Once a man has sex with a woman he has no other reason to stay with her.

 

3) You can lure a man into marriage (or anything else) by selectively withholding sex from him.

 

None of these suggestions have any absolute truth to them, but each of them have been found to be true at one time or another.

 

Where you may be getting yourself into a jam is if you intended to remain a virgin until marriage and the only reason you went ahead and had sex is because he told you would be married one day. If you have not made an announcement, become engaged or the like, you may be giving away the milk and your boyfriend may never buy the cow (Pardon the example. I'm not suggesting that you are a commodity).

 

The bottom line is....there are no guarantees in this life. Even if have made an announcement, gotten engaged, gotten married, had sex with someone, it doesn't mean things will turn like you expected they would in the beginning.

 

So tell your Uncle you appreciate his advice and keep it in mind. Don't cry over spilt milk and hope that your boyfriend doesn't have foot-in-mouth disease!

[jim]

I personally think it's true to a little extent ... sometimes guy's feeling fade FAST once they sleep with the girl ... whether or not they're married to her or not ... so it's just a risk you take ... i personally wouldn't marry someone without sleeping with them first - to be sure that that isn't all they want from me ... (i think often guys don't even realize themselves that that's all they want) just my opinion though!! i hope tony gives a more prof. one! after sleeping with the girl im falling in love with i will still love her love her and love her because she is very special to me but thats just me.