Feel lost and alone in my job. Not sure what I can do.

[regarding love]

I work in an office. Have for a number of years. Much of my team left for pastures new, many as a result of the ongoing pandemic. 

I stayed because I was comfortable, got to know their replacements and even received promotion - managing a small number of staff. I was ecstatic about this, at least initially. 

I hate to sound ungrateful. It's just I feel so alone and out of place now. They're a wonderful team but I almost feel like I don't belong. As though time has moved on and I am being left behind - maybe a tad dramatic I know!

However, there have been so many changes within my team - with staff, roles and responsibilities - that my new position now lacks both direction and clarity. Like I am wandering aimlessly. It often feels as though my staff have more responsibility and a better  understanding than I do. 

I am trying hard not to be pessimistic but have found much of my self confidence drained, leaving me an almost anxious and timid version of myself. I was even shaking after a meeting recently! I shouldn't be that nervous at a small team conference. 

I met a colleague, same position but in a team adjacent to my own. This colleague had enormous responsibility and confidence, leaving me feeling a little embarrassed inside and certainly envious. My thoughts - what I assume to be intrusive thoughts - led me down a road, considering whether my staff may look to that colleague as an example, look to move from me as their manager to them. 

Maybe it's my own self confidence. Maybe I wasn't up for the task at hand. I just feel lost, as though my team have forgotten me and that our roles and responsibilities are so ill defined at the moment, I can't seem to dig myself out.

I am rambling, for which I do apologise. I guess I just need to hear what others think. I would appreciate that.

Thank you.

[d0nnivain]

Think about what it would take to make the position interesting for you.  What responsibilities do you want? Design your own job with those goals in mind. 

Then go to your bosses & say something like

This is what I do now but I think it would be better for everyone & more cost effective if I did this instead.  This is how you would save money & increase productivity.  (You need to write your own job description & give it to them.  Also you need to be able to address how the changes you want effect the bottom line)  What do you think?   

Hopefully they will appreciate your initiative & give you a more fulfilling role.  

Edited March 11, 2021 by d0nnivain