Confusedone24 Posted March 23, 2021 Share Posted March 23, 2021 (edited) previous post: How would you feel/react if you had an unexpected pregnancy 5 years into a relationship then upon announcing it to your boyfriend, who has anxiety issues, he has a panic attack about finances and figuring everything out during it considering you both were unemployed, living at your seperate parents? He shares he doesnt know if he is ready to be a father but he will do whatever he can to make it work. Then once he calmed down, he wrote you a letter apologizing about the panic attack and explains his panic, then wants to support you and figure everything out. How would you react/feel about him panicking to this situation? Would you feel like he does not love you or does not want to be with you? Edited March 23, 2021 by a LoveShack.org Moderator Added link to previous post for clarity Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted March 23, 2021 Share Posted March 23, 2021 (edited) 28 minutes ago, Confusedone24 said: he has a panic attack about finances and figuring everything out during it considering you both were unemployed, living at your seperate parents? He shares he doesnt know if he is ready to be a father but he will do whatever he can to make it work. Just curious, your last post claims you are the BF? What have you decided to do? Edited March 23, 2021 by Wiseman2 1 Link to post Share on other sites
cleverusername Posted March 23, 2021 Share Posted March 23, 2021 I would probably take him to a medical professional because he's having a justified panic attack Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted March 23, 2021 Share Posted March 23, 2021 Learning that you will become a father while unemployed living at your parents is enough to have a panic attack. No, I would not conclude he doesn't love me. The both are not connected 3 Link to post Share on other sites
kendahke Posted March 23, 2021 Share Posted March 23, 2021 (edited) Given all of what you said about his penchant for panic attacks, the fact that both he and you are unemployed and he's not no life plan of action at the moment and you're living at your parent's houses, I'd say his reaction is rather normal---in that he also owned that he was freaked out, isn't ready to be a parent right now, but will support you in your decisions. Be glad he did this instead of telling you "I hope you don't expect me to marry you", or tell you to get it handled. Stop looking for a bludgeoning tool and cut him some slack--you dropped one of the biggest life bombs on him. When you really have something to worry about is 5 months down the line, he's still telling you he doesn't want to be a parent and wants you to give the child up for adoption or leaves you to be a single mother raising a child alone. What's up with both of your birth control use? Edited March 23, 2021 by kendahke 2 Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted March 23, 2021 Share Posted March 23, 2021 It was unexpected, of course he's gonna get anxious about it...he's in shock. Once he sees it's not as huge worry, with the support/advice from the parents... he'll calm down. once that baby is born, he'll fall in love and be a good father. Link to post Share on other sites
dramafreezone Posted March 23, 2021 Share Posted March 23, 2021 (edited) You had a weak moment. Everyone does at one point or another, but you got yourself together and you're proceeding with a plan like a man should. She should've felt encouraged if anything. Edited March 23, 2021 by dramafreezone Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted March 23, 2021 Share Posted March 23, 2021 (edited) [] While I understand & appreciate your double heartbreak here, in all likelihood, even if you had not had the panic attack & gave what she viewed as the "perfect" response to her news, the outcome may have been the same -- termination of pregnancy & end of the relationship because both of you were simply too young to deal with all of this. Since you are on here asking for advice, my best advice is that you have to move forward. That means accepting the break up & the termination of the pregnancy. Talk to your parents. Get counseling if that what it takes. Pray, a lot, if you are a person of faith. You don't have to go through this alone but you can't go through it with your Ex-GF. Edited March 25, 2021 by a LoveShack.org Moderator Off topic 3 1 Link to post Share on other sites
kendahke Posted March 23, 2021 Share Posted March 23, 2021 (edited) On 3/23/2021 at 12:23 PM, trident_2020 said: [deleted] [] OP, stop wasting time you'll never get back. What you did broke the camel's back. Right now, spend your time with a therapist and get a handle of your anxiety. You see that it ruins things for you. But still, what's up with both of your birth control? Edited March 25, 2021 by a LoveShack.org Moderator Link to post Share on other sites
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