IslandSanctuary Posted March 30, 2021 Share Posted March 30, 2021 One of my best childhood friends is getting married. I don't see him much any more - I moved away for work and I'm married myself now. He's had a stag party organized for him at a friend of a friends Stripclub. It doubles as a night club and is quite popular, with the strip club through a big heavy red door out the back. They have poker nights, pool nights and even Playstation tourny nights. I've been there before, before I met my wife and the strip club consists of lounge chairs, tables and big comfy bench seats and a few poles for dancing on. The music plays really loud - like a nightclub - and the women will dance on the pole and 'work the room' for tips where they approach your table, dance against you, sit on your lap, rub their breasts in your face etc. Just being there implies you are game for this and there isn't much you can do to prevent it besides have a closed off posture and failing that you'd have to physically stop them - which at the very least would be a vibe killer and seem impolite and at the worst could land you in trouble with the multiple bouncers - touching the girls isn't allowed unless they obviously encourage it or unless they are touching you. My wife said she's ok about it, but I can tell it makes her nervous. I know she doesn't really understand what goes on in a stripclub - it's just looking to her. She's fine with porn because that is just looking and doesn't involve any interaction with anyone else. But I think about if the roles were reversed I wouldn't want some naked guy grinding his junk on her or sitting on her lap or sticking his dong right in her face. A lot of strippers do 'extras' for extra cash and the whole stripclub has been rented out for the evening so we will have it all to ourselves. I know of bachelor parties where they get strippers to do dildo shows, strap on shows with 2 girls and even have audience members have a go with the dildo. I'm not saying anything like this will happen but on a bucks night with lots of alcohol you can't rule it out. I'd really like to go, but at the same time I think I should stay home. Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted March 30, 2021 Share Posted March 30, 2021 The strippers at the club are interested in the big tippers. If one approaches you, hold up your hand in a stop sign & shake your head no. The stripper will move along. But if going to this really bothers you, stay home. Maybe you can take your buddy out separately. You will see him at the wedding. FWIW, one of the best pre-wedding things DH & I did was have dinner with a childhood friend of mine & her husband. They gave us some marriage / wedding day tips. It was calm & a nice chance to visit, unlike a pre-wedding party with too many people & not enough one on one time. You & your wife could also have the happy couple over when they return from their HM. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Crazelnut Posted March 30, 2021 Share Posted March 30, 2021 Don't go. Just don't. If your wife ever gets wind of what really went on, she'll probably be very upset. Sorry if this is judgey, but that place sounds nasty. Why would you want to go there? 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Alpacalia Posted March 30, 2021 Share Posted March 30, 2021 Sounds like quite an adventure. A lot of women don't have a problem with this but I guess put yourself in her shoes. Link to post Share on other sites
Miss Peach Posted March 30, 2021 Share Posted March 30, 2021 (edited) I've been to strip clubs and have friends that have been to the crazier ones in Mexico who have told me a lot of the details. For what it's worth I'm more sex positive than a lot of women out there. I would be willing to attend a lifestyle, tantra, etc. party. To be honest it would bother me a lot if I had a serious partner who went to something like this without me. I had a boyfriend who used to go to things like this and very nearly dumped him over it. On top of going to something like this he was evasive and omissive too. I couldn't handle it and it caused trust issues for at least a year. Now if you were just going to get drunk at a topless bar or something like that (which is my guess of what she may be picturing) I would be totally fine with that. My issue more is with the interaction and what's essentially live sex shows. To me the only way I can handle that sort of stuff is as an adventure together. Edited March 30, 2021 by Miss Peach Link to post Share on other sites
mark clemson Posted March 31, 2021 Share Posted March 31, 2021 7 hours ago, IslandSanctuary said: I'd really like to go, but at the same time I think I should stay home. It's your life. I'd say letting your conscience be your guide is the course of wisdom here. (Personal note: I can honestly say I've never gone to a strip club. At some point I realized this was a bit weird, but at that point I was already with my wife (LT engaged, but not married yet) and so figured I'd just as well keep my "perfect record" and so I have.) Link to post Share on other sites
Angelle Posted March 31, 2021 Share Posted March 31, 2021 Don't go, if you think your wife is nervous about it. Also, if you think you can't control yourself after having a few drinks. Your wife matters more than a bachelor party. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
LivingWaterPlease Posted March 31, 2021 Share Posted March 31, 2021 Don't go. I'm with the poster who says this sounds nasty. Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted March 31, 2021 Share Posted March 31, 2021 I'm not a fan of strip clubs but what the OP described is TYPICAL. It's no more nasty then every other strip club in the world. I tended bar in a place that had a strip club downstairs. He's not going to have to physically remove the dancer from his person. The stripper doesn't want to force herself on somebody especially in a room filled with willing guys who want her attention. In a bachelor party situation unless the group wants her to embarrass one buddy, the women go to the men who want them, not the guys who are along for the ride. Still if the OP remains conflicted, better than he err on the side of caution & skip it. Link to post Share on other sites
Fletch Lives Posted March 31, 2021 Share Posted March 31, 2021 In life, you have to give up some things to get some things. There is no free lunch. It's the same in marriage. Looking at other women, including those at a strip club, can make a woman jealous and drop her love level. In marriage, you are supposed to give up the go-go joints and you get more love from your wife in return. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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