Nurse / Doctor flirting

[Bridget27]

hello - I am a nurse in the uk and I have fallen for one of the doctors on my unit.

I know your prob thinking - this is so typical, very common etc etc.

and I’m sure that’s true. After all we spend a lot of hours together and work closely so tend to see a lot of each other around.

this guy has my heart completely in a heap though. And part of me is saying no it’s all in your head , cop on. Your just day dreaming. But I feel him flirting. I feel the tension. There has also been occasions where other nurses have noticed too. 
But most haven’t got a clue. And Tbh most of my colleagues can’t stand him - he really doesn’t involve himself or chat with a lot of other nurses tbh he just keeps to himself. 
He is also from the same country and city I am from - and I think that is also a reason why I just get his sarcasm and abruptness and I don’t find it rude. We really tease each other and act playfully  mean to each other when we are talking or working together - I just feel like i get him. Like if I met

him out I would also be instantly attracted to him. And we would easily get on as we seem to get each other’s sense of humour. 
We were flirting for months and months and I could feel it building up. 
One day in the clinical room it was just the two of us and we were standing so close to each other - mayve a foot distance between us. 
And he was just ... staring at me and smiling. The type of gazing that makes your heart drop and I could feel the tension build up and up- and honestly I could have kissed him.

I wanted to so bad ( but obviously  work 
So I didn’t). But it’s the type of way you look at someone just before you go in to kiss them. And his eyes were one of the first things I fell for - he has these beautiful deep brown eyes that just seem to say so much about him just by the way he looks - if that makes sense. Like he has really expressive eyes. 
thing is in that moment I felt like he wanted to kiss me too - and I feel like if I hadn’t walked away we might have . With him - I just feel this , connection. Like we just bounce off each other - we enjoy teasing each other and equally we are serious when we have to and can pick it up off the other person if they are busy.

it is important to mention - he also has a girlfriend and I’m pretty sure she is been with him for years.

this past year though he has become so cold to me. Like completely 360 - he doesn’t flirt with me that much anymore and doesn’t even acknowledge me or tease or anymore unless he has to. It breaks my heart to be honest. There’s been a few times where he as been rude to me in front of doctors and it broke my heart. Like I lt makes me feel crazy - did he ever like me in the first place. Am I going insane to think he was even flirting with me? Is this all in my head ? 
So many times I wanted to tell him how I feel - but I cudnt. I didn’t want to get rejected and then we still have to work with each other. And the fact he has a girlfriend maybe he is just ignoring our connection and trying to be fateful to her.

but gosh I wish I knew how he felt. 
and how embarrassed I would feel I’d this was all in my head . But part of me doesn’t want to go completely cold on him - I still have feelings for him and I want to impress him still and get his attention. But is it time to stop feeling so down over it all and just move on ? 

[Wiseman2]

5 minutes ago, Bridget27 said:

And the fact he has a girlfriend maybe he is just ignoring our connection and trying to be fateful to her.

This is a definite possibility.

[Bridget27]

Furthermore - I still catch him gazing at me.

even though he acts cold to me -

i still seem him staring at me.and some days i go to a bit more effort and I do my hair nice makeup etc and I can see him staring . One day I was going into the staff room and he was sitting outside the staff toilets with a few other doctors - I had walked past them and went to type in the code and just glanced to my side and I can see from the corner of my eye he is staring at me.. and it makes me think he still has feelings for me perhaps ... but why isn’t he acting on it . It feels like his deciding to ignore our feelings and he has every right

to ... but it just breaks my heart so much because I still care about him. Like when I see him so tired and stressed I know to give him space or sometimes I leave him little treats and he smiles like a child. 
When we talk I can still feel the attraction but I also feel his efforts to ignore it and how I wish I could just get into his head and see what is going on.

Edited April 1, 2021 by Bridget27

[d0nnivain]

1 hour ago, Bridget27 said:

 he also has a girlfriend and I’m pretty sure she is been with him for years.

this past year though he has become so cold to me. Like completely 360 - he doesn’t flirt with me that much anymore and doesn’t even acknowledge me or tease or anymore unless he has to. It breaks my heart to be honest. 

* * * 

but gosh I wish I knew how he felt. 

* * *

But is it time to stop feeling so down over it all and just move on ? 

You know how he feels.  His actions in no longer flirting with you tell you everything you don't want to know.  It was a fun, harmless work flirt to pass the time but he does not want to date you.  Kissing him in a work setting would be massively inappropriate, not to mention covid unsafe.   He has a GF.  This is a non starter 

It's time to move on.   If you can't deal with being around him knowing your feelings are not reciprocated, get a different job in another department or office.  Medical professionals are a hot commodity.  You won't have trouble finding something new. 

[glows]

2 hours ago, Bridget27 said:

But is it time to stop feeling so down over it all and just move on ? 

Yes, try this. Take your mind off of this for awhile and come back to it later. He's attached/in a relationship so this is all kinds of complicated and issues. Why mess around with all that? Don't you deserve someone who is free from all that, single and interested in you? 

[LivingWaterPlease]

Bridget, because a man stares at you, though it's flattering, is not an affirmation he has feelings for you or wants to date you. I have a single male family member who told me there is a woman his friends have tried to get him to date. She is beautiful but he doesn't want to date her for his own personal reasons. When telling me about this he ended it with, "But I stare at her because she's so beautiful. I just stand and stare at her." Something like that.

Your Dr. friend has a gf and was wise to back off of the flirtations with you. It probably would have been entertaining for him to continue to flirt with you. But, he's trying to be respectful to both you and his gf.  IMO you'd be wise to follow suit and stop giving him little extra attentions.

[dramafreezone]

I think this is just a case of you wanting someone you can't have.

Iif somehow he were suddenly single it'd be hot and heavy for a few months maybe, then you'd be over it.

Edited April 2, 2021 by dramafreezone

[Wiseman2]

Enjoy your fantasy and crush. However there's plenty of other doctors where you work to consider dating.