Love that you're allowed?

[Ducky]

Any of you out there believe you're only allowed to be with certain someone, and no one else?

 

Sometimes I see some couples and I would say to myself, I can be that guy and do what he is doing. Why can't it be me over there with that girl?

 

What about fate? Sometimes you see very odd looking couples and yet they are together, very happy.

 

So is there such thing as you only get the love that you're allowed? How would you know who to pursue?

[Tony T]

1. "Any of you out there believe you're only allowed to be with certain someone, and no one else?"

 

Not me, anyway. What authority would be doing the allowing? We are born with a free will. We can be with as many people as we want or are capable of. Wouldn't it be tragic if you were meant to be with someone in Antarctica? If you never went there, you would be alone forever.

 

There are lots of people on this earth and many, many people who would be good for each of us. Luckily, we need only find one in most cases.

 

2. "Sometimes I see some couples and I would say to myself, I can be that guy and do what he is doing. Why can't it be me over there with that girl?"

 

This is pretty insane. You have no idea if this couple is happy, if the girl is a bxtch, if she has bad breath, if she is dating many other people, if she is dying from AIDS, etc. How can you just look at a couple and make some kind of conjecture like that?

 

Now you can look at a couple having fun and being affectionate and wish you had a similar relationship with a nice person. If that's what you would be meaning, all you'd have to do is get off your butt and find that situation.

 

Envy of others' apparent happiness is counterproductive. Let others be happy and find your own happiness. If you look at another guy with a lady and wish you could take his place, in time there will be other guys looking at you and wishing the same thing. That's a hell of a way to live. YUK!!!

 

3. "What about fate? Sometimes you see very odd looking couples and yet they are together, very happy."

 

You sure make a lot of wild assumptions. How do you know which specific couples are happy? Maybe they could be having some happy moments...even trying to put on a show. Maybe they just met. Maybe they're going to break up a week later.

 

If a couple seems odd to you, that doesn't mean the arrangement is odd. If they are OK with being together, that's all that matters.

 

You have a serious problem with making assumptions based on superficial observation. This will get you into major trouble if you don't stop.

 

How do you know these odd looking couples are very happy? If you are so superhuman, you shouldn't have any trouble whatsoever bettering them in the happiness department. You need to apply for a job at the CIA (Central Intelligence Agency). They would pay you millions for your ability to tell so much about people just by looking at them!!!

 

4. "So is there such thing as you only get the love that you're allowed?"

 

Again, who are you talking about? Who or what is doing the allowing that you speak of? You are the captain of your ship, the architect of your destiny. YOU allow yourself what you get. You put limitations on yourself...or you remove obstacles. You create your reality. There's no force out in the atmosphere that "allows" anything. You get the love you go after, plain and simple. If you keep going for people who reject you, you get what you deserve.

 

5. "How would you know who to pursue?"

 

Pursue people who you are attracted to, who are receptive to you, who are nice to you, who respect you, who are kind, considerate, thoughtful and compatible with you.

 

I urge you to sit with some friends who have experience in dating and have them fill you in on the details.