breaking up

[beep]

Ok, my girl friend of 6 and a half months just decided that she is not ready to be in a relationship and that she has never done well with boyfriends, we are about 9 years apart, she is 20. I feel I have been very good to her, respect her, and we really never fight. I know that I ve treated her better than any ever treated her before. I am feeling sad and hate this feeling, it seems like I always have a hard time with dealing with breaking up.

 

We have never told each other that we loved each other, but she says that she still wants to hang out with me, I just told her to call me, and that I will leave her alone. Is there any hope for us? I care for her a lot and miss her already. It's been 3 days. We only saw each other on weekends when we were together somethimes only once a week, but her schedule is pretty busy this summer and I am off for the summer.

 

Going into this, I didn't know how long we'd last because of our age difference, I was enjoying the company. I feel like nice guys finish last again!!!!

[Tony T]

This has nothing to do with being a nice guy or with the age difference either. Your girl just isn't ready for a serious relationship of any duration right now. The fact that you can't understand this or respect the fact sort of makes you ineligible for her anyway.

 

Yes, you could be with her in the future for sure. But only if you back off, don't be her buddy, start seeing other people and let her call you later on when she might be ready.

 

You have to listen to people and take them at their word, even if they aren't sure of what they feel themselves. She doesn't want to be with you right now, or so she says, so get moving. She'll have absolutely no respect for you if you just stop your life to hang around her.

 

It's not a good idea...as a matter of fact it's a real bad idea...to hold out hope in cases like this. You could end up just being her friend in hopes she will come back and be more to you...and then one day she could end up with someone else.

 

The best thing you can do is BE A MAN and move on with your life and leave her in the dust. When it clears, maybe she'll catch up with you. Right now, she's still growing up.

[beep]

This has nothing to do with being a nice guy or with the age difference either. Your girl just isn't ready for a serious relationship of any duration right now. The fact that you can't understand this or respect the fact sort of makes you ineligible for her anyway. Yes, you could be with her in the future for sure. But only if you back off, don't be her buddy, start seeing other people and let her call you later on when she might be ready. You have to listen to people and take them at their word, even if they aren't sure of what they feel themselves. She doesn't want to be with you right now, or so she says, so get moving. She'll have absolutely no respect for you if you just stop your life to hang around her. It's not a good idea...as a matter of fact it's a real bad idea...to hold out hope in cases like this. You could end up just being her friend in hopes she will come back and be more to you...and then one day she could end up with someone else.

 

The best thing you can do is BE A MAN and move on with your life and leave her in the dust. When it clears, maybe she'll catch up with you. Right now, she's still growing up. It's not that I don't understand or don't respect it, I fully respect that. Thanks Tony for your advice. I just wish I was one of those people that could just move on and not look back, I just care for her.