Why hasn't she blocked me on social media?

[fckmylife83]

Sorry for the long story.

I had joined this discord with a dude I matched with on bumble bff. A few weeks ago this girl joined up and I decided to talk to her. I found that I wanted to get to know her more and I friended her. For the past few weeks in the discord we do game nights or watch parties where we play games together. I've talked to her privately about how I was rejected by a girl from my class recently and she gave me her advice about it. We talk about each other and have sometimes played games with just the two of us.

Recently during a trivia game night where there was a game mode where we make questions about ourselves and she mentioned that she is in a complicated relationship with someone.

Later on I ask her privately what is going on with her "complicated" relationship". And she mentions that she and her boyfriend haven't been getting along lately. She mentions how she's always the one who initiates conversations and he doesn't even bother trying to talk to her anymore. She mentions one time that when she was really sick her bf didn't bother calling her or doing anything for her. She also talks about how recently they got into a fight during a video call. He stood there and didn't say anything and when she said "do you not wanna talk to me" he said "No". When she called him out on it he just said that he was joking and she told him that wasn't funny. She tells me that it doesn't really feel like she's in a relationship anymore. I'm not really sure what to think about them tho.

We had dinner together a few weeks ago and it seemed like we both had a great time. We talked about ourselves and the people in the discord. We asked questions about each other and teased each other about the way we played during game nights. When I asked if she'd wanna do this again she agreed and told me she had fun. When we talked later she said she patched things up with her boyfriend and that we shouldn't hang out together one on one anymore.

I saw that she spent nearly 5 hours talking with the discord admin guy. I got jealous and I ended up telling another friend in the discord privately that I didn't want to be the admins friend. He ended up banning me from the discord because of that.

The discord had been planning a hiking trip but I didn't go because of what happened. I found out she had showed a conversation between us where I told her I didn't want to be the admins friend. She said the two of us could still patch things up and be friends but I told her she shouldn't have done that.

I asked her if we could still hangout together and she said she doesn't want to if I had other intentions beyond being a friend. I then told her yeah I really like you and I want something more between us so your probably right we shouldn't be friends.

I got mad at her and told her why won't you just unfollow and unfriend me on social media because it feels like you already chose a side and that it already feels like you cut me out of your life. She said she doesn't unfollow or unfriend people unless they really annoy her or she wants to cut ties with them. I said I was already an a**h*** to you and you basically already cut ties with me so just do it already.

She still hasnt unfriended or unfollowed me on social media. And I see that shes still some part of some of the few people who view my stories on instagram. Why hasn't she done so already.

TLDR: I confessed to a girl I was in a discord server with that I liked her but she doesn't wanna be close anymore and I told her she should unfollow me on all social media because it feels like she already cut me out of her life.

[Sun Seeker]

She already told you why she hasn't, []

And probably because she's mature enough to be able to end a relationship in a civil way without getting upset and blocking everyone in a rage. []

Edited April 25, 2021 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
Rude

[Acacia98]

4 hours ago, fckmylife83 said:

She still hasnt unfriended or unfollowed me on social media. And I see that shes still some part of some of the few people who view my stories on instagram. Why hasn't she done so already.

I find it strange that you're wasting so much time wondering about her motivations. Why don't you just unfriend and unfollow her if that will help you deal with the pain/humiliation and recover faster?

Edited April 25, 2021 by Acacia98

[fckmylife83]

1 hour ago, Punterxx said:

She already told you why she hasn't, what's confusing about that?

And probably because she's mature enough to be able to end a relationship in a civil way without getting upset and blocking everyone in a rage. Something you can definitely learn from her.

She is anything but mature. She knowingly lead on me and other guy in the discord and lied to to us that she didn't have a boyfriend because she wanted male attention because her boyfriend was neglecting her. When we had dinner together she talked a lot of s*** about her boyfriend and how he wasn't paying attention to her and neglecting her even she she was really ill one time. She lies when its convenient so she can get attention. I learned that she lead on another man from the discord for two months lying that she didn't have a boyfriend and telling the other guy that she wasn't ready for a relationship dumping all her problems on him taking advantage of his kindness because she knew he liked her. 

I didn't write everything that happened because there is way too much I can think about but there you go. She isn't the sweetheart that I thought she was she just has everyone fooled because she's cute. 

[fckmylife83]

29 minutes ago, Acacia98 said:

I find it strange that you're wasting so much time wondering about her motivations. Why don't you just unfriend and unfollow her if that will help you deal with the pain/humiliation and recover faster?

Because I'm a hopeless romantic who's never had a girl like him before and latches onto anyone who seems like they might like him. In the actual message I sent her I was being a complete dick to her telling her I think you should block me because if your so hung up on your shitty boyfriend then you should block me because it already feels like you cut ties with me. If she liked me at all she won't block me but if she does it'll be easier to move on. 

Edited April 25, 2021 by fckmylife83

[basil67]

She was clear with you from the outset that she had a boyfriend and I can't see anything in what you've written which implies she was leading you on.   Thing is, when a girl talks all about her relationship woes with you, she's doing it because she sees you as a friend.   

She also did nothing wrong by showing someone the discussion about you not wanting to be the admin's friend because he had a long conversation with her.   If it's OK for you to get feedback from another guy on what he thinks of her, then it's OK for her to get feedback from other people on what they think of you.

As for her not blocking you, that's her drawing a line in the sand showing that you can't control her.  So if you want her gone, you have to block her.  

[fckmylife83]

1 minute ago, basil67 said:

She was clear with you from the outset that she had a boyfriend and I can't see anything in what you've written which implies she was leading you on.   Thing is, when a girl talks all about her relationship woes with you, she's doing it because she sees you as a friend.   

She also did nothing wrong by showing someone the discussion about you not wanting to be the admin's friend because he had a long conversation with her.   If it's OK for you to get feedback from another guy on what he thinks of her, then it's OK for her to get feedback from other people on what they think of you.

As for her not blocking you, that's her drawing a line in the sand showing that you can't control her.  So if you want her gone, you have to block her.  

She wasn't clear from the outset that she had a boyfriend she lied to everyone in the discord that she didn't have one and only revealed it later on. Yeah she did do something wrong when she showed the admin our conversation. She said she wanted us to get along but only an idiot would think that the conversation we had would've convinced him to let me stay I told her i'd fix it and not to tell him anything but she went behind my back and did it anyway. 

and no shes not some strong women who thinks shes taking control by not doing what I tell her. She knowingly lead me on as well as another guy in the discord because she wanted male attention because her shitty boyfriend wasn't giving it to her. I learned about how she manipulated the other guy in the discord later on when she said she went on tinder and matched with him when it said on his profile he was looking for a gf. She lied and didn't tell him she had a boyfriend so she could dump all her problems on him because he was a nice guy. after two months he told her he liked her and she lied saying she wasn't ready for a relationship. Only later on did she finally confess that she actually had a boyfriend. 

She was 100% leading me on. Only a fool would think that a guy you barely know asking you out to dinner didn't like you. And no we both talked about our relationship woes to each other she asked me about mine and then she told me hers. 

[basil67]

So if she's so terrible, block her.

[Wiseman2]

5 hours ago, fckmylife83 said:

 she said she patched things up with her boyfriend and that we shouldn't hang out together one on one anymore.

I saw that she spent nearly 5 hours talking with the discord admin guy. I got jealous and .He ended up banning me from the discord because of that.

Ok. It's good you got banned because it was getting weird in this discord group.

She has a BF. Steer clear of that. It's your job to delete and block her and all her people from ALL your social media and messaging apps.

That way you can get on some dating apps and start talking to and meeting women.

Try to maintain better boundaries.

[Indigo Night]

Stop wasting so much emotional energy on someone who has made it clear that they aren't interested in being more then friends with you.

It didn't matter if you thought she wanted more at first, and she lead you on, say first. She has since made it clear to you that she didn't want a relationship with you. 

It's not her problem that you are struggling with moving on because she won't block you. She may have just deleted you, and once she did you were out of sight, and you're not on her mind.

Do whatever works for you;  block her, delete her, or stare at her screenname driving yourself crazy wondering why she won't block you. What did it mean when she didn't block you??? Nothing. She didn't block you. She isn't reaching out to you either. 

If you're going to correct people for their responses, based on the information you provided, then provide all of the relevant information. Every post you have added information to is  basically trashing her more and more.

We get it.  She is a horrible emotional succubus!  Thankfully, you don't have to deal with her anymore. Good riddance!!

 

 

[d0nnivain]

You are very immature.  Hey, it's a function of age.  We all do dumb things when we are young. She's not much better. 

You ignored some serious red flags here, then let them color your actions. 

I don't care how much of a "romantic" you are or how badly you want your 1st GF,  girls who already have BFs are not available.  Stop chasing them.  Find a switch in your brain that you flip whenever somebody tells you she has a BF.  The minute you hear those words you have to categorize her as unavailable.  There is zero romantic possibility here.  So you never should have gone out one on one with her for dinner. It was too date like & she was using you to emotionally cheat on her BF.  Her better move would be to end the relationship that isn't working.  If she lied to you or at least concealed the truth & you thought she was single at the time of the dinner, then she is an awful person & you dodged a bullet with this one because she's not worth your effort.  

The odd thing in here is that you got jealous over the admin of some on line group who was her friend but you don't seem to have much problem with her actual BF.  That makes no sense.  Is it because the admin is somebody you know from the discord group while the BF is just a concept, so the BF isn't as real to you?  

It's a shame that her hurtful manipulation caused you to get booted out of the group when she was the instigator but again your anger was misplaced.  Nothing that happened was the fault of the administrator.  If anything she was probably using him the same way she used you so I don't see the point in being mad at him but when you were upset with him I can see why he viewed you as an angry troublemaker who was going to upset the harmony of the group. 

Going forward in group things like this, where everything you "say" is written & saved, assume everybody in the place can read what you wrote.  Nothing is private. So communicate as though it's all public.  In short be diplomatic.  

If you no longer want to interact with her, you have the ability to unfriend, unfollow & block her.  Do it.  Stop giving her all the control.