I will never get married again. why do people get upset when I say this?

[NYAG]

The grass is always greener on the other side. Until you get to the other side, and realise you probably were better off where you were. Which is why so many MMs and MWs stay in their marriages. Despite everything it's usually the better deal.

[Alfano]

4 hours ago, NYAG said:

I don't understand that response.

I'm simply applying your own reasoning to gambling odds as you did to marriage. Overall, it's gambling is a failure for the masses or everyone would be rich. Overall, marriage is a failure the masses or there wouldn't be so many divorces.  Same difference.

 

[FMW]

@Alfano, I'm not sure why statistics on success or failure matter as relates to this post. 

In my response to the OP (which elicited yours) I specifically noted I didn't see marriage as a failed institution to make clear that my view on that is immaterial to whether or not someone should be upset about another person's choice. The issue was about people being upset with OP's talking about never getting married again, not a debate on whether marriage statistically makes sense.  Marriage isn't something I ever want again, I'm very clear on that.  Any response I would have to someone who had the nerve to express their displeasure with my choice would have nothing to do with failure rates.  Maybe they would to someone else, but unless I missed it, the OP did not say her reasons were based on statistics.  

You're of course free to respond in anyway you choose, but I think debating whether marriage should exist anymore is not helpful to this specific discussion. To me, it sidetracks discussion of OP's thread.  Maybe it would be a useful topic for a separate thread.

[understand50]

Toothgirl2,

When my buddies, from my younger days, stated as you do, I would start planning to attend their wedding.  You can be against tying the knot now, but in our society, you do not have to declare and have this stay forever.  Hell, you could be 60 plus and decide to get married.  So, right now, you are not inclined.  Maybe later, maybe never.  In any case it is your business, and I would not hold it against you. Nor, would I hold you up as an example.  We are each a individual, and have our own paths.  Folks who get married are not and example ether.  What works for a couple or individual, can not be for all.   I do point out, that "love" and marriage happens, and sometimes when you least expect it.  If it does, I hope it works out for you, and I wish you luck in what ever you do.

[Happy Lemming]

About a year before the pandemic, I was waiting in this long grocery line.  My grocery list was sitting on top of the bread in the cart.  A couple in their late 50's were behind me.  I heard this guy say to his wife, "Look his wife sends him to the store with a typed list".  I turned back and said "I'm not married... never been. I keep my grocery list on my hard drive and add to it as I remember things I need, then I print it out for my weekly grocery run"

Then he said to me "No wife, ever... I bet you're rich."  I responded "No, but I was able to retire early at 52."  Then he turned to his wife and said "See, that is what I was talking about."

Then the wife turned to me and asked "Are you happy?" I said "Yes, very much so... Life is good!"

I can only imagine this couple must have had a recent argument about money or retirement planning or whatever.  I guess I reinforced his side of the argument that he would have been better off if he had never gotten married.

I think marriage works for some people, but isn't for everyone.  I realized that it wasn't for me.

 

[Harry Korsnes]

Hi

So dont get married again, it's up to you. You dont need to listen  to anyone.

[Wiseman2]

On 4/28/2021 at 2:36 PM, Toothgirl2 said:

 But society has these rules and people have their opinions on this matter. My parents stayed together in a miserable marriage, and now I am doing the same. 

People want to see you march as couples.