Author ItsTheDay Posted May 17, 2021 Author Share Posted May 17, 2021 4 minutes ago, Marc878 said: Sounds like you’re keeping yourself in this. That’s what needless contact does. Like most you can’t let go. Make no mistake that is what you’re doing. You are analyzing everything she says/does. It’s hopium. Get your own dog. She actually told me before she wanted me to take him, I'm not at a place where I can have a dog full time. I'm currently renting a room with a couple roommates but they all agreed I can have him on the weekends. Link to post Share on other sites
Marc878 Posted May 17, 2021 Share Posted May 17, 2021 Ok but any contact means you will keep yourself in this. I get it. It’s not easy but like most in these situations she has someone else. It won’t bother her but you’ll just get more devastated when you see it because you are to close. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author ItsTheDay Posted May 17, 2021 Author Share Posted May 17, 2021 36 minutes ago, Marc878 said: Ok but any contact means you will keep yourself in this. I get it. It’s not easy but like most in these situations she has someone else. It won’t bother her but you’ll just get more devastated when you see it because you are to close. I'm just going to continue doing me. I'm not even thinking about "seeing it" but I'm sure my visits will be planned around it. Link to post Share on other sites
Marc878 Posted May 18, 2021 Share Posted May 18, 2021 (edited) On 5/17/2021 at 3:54 PM, ItsTheDay said: I'm just going to continue doing me. I'm not even thinking about "seeing it" but I'm sure my visits will be planned around it. I hope at some point you wake up. You need to. For you. Edited May 18, 2021 by Marc878 Link to post Share on other sites
Highndry Posted May 19, 2021 Share Posted May 19, 2021 The relationship was over well before she officially ended it. Having sex once a month? No man is happy with that. Separate beds and bedrooms? Find a better woman, my friend, she's not a keeper. Link to post Share on other sites
Author ItsTheDay Posted May 21, 2021 Author Share Posted May 21, 2021 On 5/19/2021 at 2:46 AM, Highndry said: The relationship was over well before she officially ended it. Having sex once a month? No man is happy with that. Separate beds and bedrooms? Find a better woman, my friend, she's not a keeper. Yeah, I can see your point about the sex once a month. Sometimes it happened 2 or 3 times a month but mainly it was once a month a couple days before her period. Now I'm not trying to defend her in this, but I did come to an understanding with her. She has stomach issues and she gets bad gas and doesn't feel "attractive" when that happens, that's also another reason why we slept in different rooms. She use to keep a log of the foods she ate and how her stomach was doing. Even went to a doctor about it a few times and some medicine would work but whatever. Anyway, we haven't talked since I dropped off my dog to her last weekend, we arranged that I would also pick him up this weekend. It's his birthday this Saturday but I did not mention that to her. She sends me a random text yesterday saying "It's apparently Happy's birthday this weekend". I just said "Yeah I know, he's turning 7". She replies "You're probably right, I have no idea how old they are". So I sent her a picture of him with the other dog showing the date when we first got him. She just said "wow they look so young there", and that was it. Link to post Share on other sites
Allupinnit Posted May 25, 2021 Share Posted May 25, 2021 She met someone at Crossfit. My sister is a Crossfit coach and they are an incestuous bunch. Sorry man, but she also probably wouldn't have been looking had your r'ship been solid. Did you hide the debt from her? Did she feel duped by you? Link to post Share on other sites
Author ItsTheDay Posted May 25, 2021 Author Share Posted May 25, 2021 (edited) 35 minutes ago, Allupinnit said: She met someone at Crossfit. My sister is a Crossfit coach and they are an incestuous bunch. Sorry man, but she also probably wouldn't have been looking had your r'ship been solid. Did you hide the debt from her? Did she feel duped by you? No, I don't believe she met someone from crossfit. She met a guy two weeks after our break up through her good friend outside of crossfit. The crossfit gym she goes to has mainly couples there, she mainly hangs out with the girls there and the girl she became good friends with there also has a boyfriend (he doesn't do crossfit or works out) and that's who she always partners with. No, I never hid my debt from her. It was a couple years into our relationship she asked about my debt, because I did tell her I was in debt. We sat down, went over it and we came up with a game plan. She wasn't angry about it, at least she didn't show she was. She mentioned a bunch of times of how excited she was to help me and how it would give us a better future. I actually did become credit card debt free, and we were both happy and then the plan was building my savings. I took over a few bills that I once was paying for in the beginning when I moved in with her. Shortly after that, my laptop went up and needed to be replaced. I picked one out, showed her and she said get it and put it on my one credit card to get 0% for 18 months and she'll add that to my budget. This was in February, It would of been paid off by now but this happened. Edited May 25, 2021 by ItsTheDay Link to post Share on other sites
Allupinnit Posted May 25, 2021 Share Posted May 25, 2021 Hmm - well, either way, I know it hurts. I was a few months away from my dream wedding when my ex-fiance broke it off for his sister's best friend. I thought I was going to die some days. But, I didn't. In fact I'm married to someone better for me now. Were you living with her rent-free while you paid off your debt? Do you save? Link to post Share on other sites
Author ItsTheDay Posted May 25, 2021 Author Share Posted May 25, 2021 (edited) 44 minutes ago, Allupinnit said: Hmm - well, either way, I know it hurts. I was a few months away from my dream wedding when my ex-fiance broke it off for his sister's best friend. I thought I was going to die some days. But, I didn't. In fact I'm married to someone better for me now. Were you living with her rent-free while you paid off your debt? Do you save? Rent free, yeah you could say that. In the beginning all she wanted me to pay was for all the utilities and internet. I also bought the dog food (raw food isn't cheap plus 2 dogs eating 3 pounds a day each) and also odd and ins around the house. I'm kind of a "handy man" and pretty mechanical. I replaced the water, upgraded both bathrooms (the master bath wasn't finished yet). I put a lot of work into her house, also bought a lot of stuff. Like I said, she found out how much debt I was in and stopped me paying for the utilities, internet and dog food. The focus was getting my debt gone. Also, when we went to the grocery store we bought our own groceries. Edited May 25, 2021 by ItsTheDay Link to post Share on other sites
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