canadian87 Posted June 2, 2021 Share Posted June 2, 2021 I met a girl one year ago. We started our relationship too soon, after 3, 4 dates she asked me if i want to be hers and I accepted. I really liked her. One month later she told me she loved me so much, I couldn't say "I love you too", I thought it was too soon for that. She became needy and started making problems if I don't see her everyday, she told me she needed me every day. But I really liked her, she was very sweet, we had good conection and good sex. 3 months later I found out she is still online in the dating app where we started our conversation. I was devastated. I hoped she was just bored or unsecure but then I reached out from the fake profile (I know its inmatured) and she startrd chatting like she was single. I thought its time to break up but I confronted her and she told me she had the problem of feeling lonely and asked me to forgive her. I agreed to continue seeing her. She was still very nice but I had my doubts. 3 months later her phone rang in the middle of the night, it was a guy she didnt't want to speak with and told me he is her ex. Tomorrow I took her mobile and found out she cheated on me sexualy with few guys every time I couldn't come to visit her. I was so stressed, I felt so hurt and I told her, she tried to deny but I told her I saw everything, she started to cry and beg me for forgiveness. I tried to stay in that relationship but I felt like I cant trust her. She gave her best to be with me but everytime I started conversation about what hurt me she didn't want to talk about that. She started cheating again and I broke up. She said she cheated because I don't trust her and I didn't really forgive her.. But she still wanted the relationship to work. I was so depressed trying to forget about her. Half year after that she reached out begging me to give her another chance and promissing me she will be faithful. I refused to come back eventhough I still miss her and our happy moments. She told me I never really loved her and she will never find a guy like me again. Did I make the right choice? I think yes but why am I still miss her that much and feel sad for her being sad and left by me??? Link to post Share on other sites
Caauug Posted June 2, 2021 Share Posted June 2, 2021 2 hours ago, canadian87 said: She said she cheated because I don't trust her and I didn't really forgive her.. I like that. It is your fault that she cheated on you!!!! What else is your fault, maybe world hunger?? The only thing that is your fault is taking her back after she cheated on you... You showed her that she can treat you like crap and you will roll over and take it. Start thinking with your head that is on your shoulders and delete and block her. If you are going to date girls like that, don't get emotionally attached to them and wear protection. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted June 2, 2021 Share Posted June 2, 2021 3 hours ago, canadian87 said: good sex. 3 months later I found out she is still online in the dating app where we started our conversation. Since you were pumping the brakes so hard with being exclusive, why wouldn't she keep looking? If you need to catfish rather than have honest conversations about exclusive dating, it's time to take a break from dating altogether. 1 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author canadian87 Posted June 2, 2021 Author Share Posted June 2, 2021 1 hour ago, Wiseman2 said: Since you were pumping the brakes so hard with being exclusive, why wouldn't she keep looking? If you need to catfish rather than have honest conversations about exclusive dating, it's time to take a break from dating altogether. I started conversations few times about that. It was hard because she refused to speak about serious things. I felt like every time I start conversation she feels afraid and wanted to change the subject. I deleted the app after our three dates when I decided it was her I want to date only. My "mistake" was that it was too much seeing her every single day but it was the begining of pandemic, I had so much stress in the office and she knew it was a hard time in general. Everytime I say we will meet tomorrow she was about to cry why not today. Refusing to stop chatting with others and never wanted to delete the apps. It was obvious she is not seeing only me but why wasn't she honest... She was telling me I am too jealouse... Of course I was, I suspected she has the other guys and it never really stopped. Even when I found out why wasn't she honest then? She tried to manipulate me and say I didn't understand good. Later when we broke up I found out (since we live in small town) that her ex broke up with her after 3 years because she cheated on him too. I could show her more interest maybe but I don't beleive it would be any different. When I'm in the relationship I don't even think about having anything with anybody else. It was not just sex that we had, I was very honest with her, making her dinners and planing to go to trip together etc Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted June 2, 2021 Share Posted June 2, 2021 1 minute ago, canadian87 said: She was telling me I am too jealouse... Of course I was, I suspected she has the other guys and it never really stopped. E Ok, if you weren't exclusive and that's what you wanted, just move forward. Why go through a mess like this replete with fake profiles, etc? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted June 2, 2021 Share Posted June 2, 2021 11 hours ago, canadian87 said: Did I make the right choice? Without any doubt, yes. She is a train wreck - far too immature and selfish for a relationship. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted June 2, 2021 Share Posted June 2, 2021 run away as fast as you can. She's a serial cheater. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Caauug Posted June 7, 2021 Share Posted June 7, 2021 On 6/2/2021 at 8:02 PM, canadian87 said: When I'm in the relationship I don't even think about having anything with anybody else. It has nothing to do with you!!!! It's got to do with her.... Men and women have different needs, this dictates what we find attractive in other people. This varies from one person to the next. As the needs are met our feelings for that person grows. This is all part of human nature. On 6/2/2021 at 8:02 PM, canadian87 said: It was obvious she is not seeing only me but why wasn't she honest... She was telling me I am too jealouse... Evolutionary biology has made her look for her best mate possible. She will not want to give up best now (you), until she has the new best.... Don't take this personally, it's just the way it is. She likely has an over inflated view of who she can get as a mate, may never find "Her Best Possible Mate" and she may burn a lot of guys like you looking.... Not everyone is compatible, the dating/engagement phase is to test on where our boundaries are and who we are compatible with. Link to post Share on other sites
BaileyB Posted June 7, 2021 Share Posted June 7, 2021 On 6/2/2021 at 1:42 AM, canadian87 said: I still miss her that much and feel sad for her being sad and left by me??? Don’t worry, she will find someone else soon... You made the right decision. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
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