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Texting ex after bad brakeup


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Background I ended a 3.5 year relationship 3 weeks ago. Really out of nowhere. I came across some of her things. I would like to get these back to her as one has value. This is a text I have drafted. If you were a woman that just had your heart crushed by who you thought you were going to marry one day what would you do. 

Aw hell, there is no right time or way to do this. I have a few of your belongings one of value. I don't want to just leave them as i don't want it falling into the wrong hands. I know I handled this poorly but i took your advise and finally saw my doctor. After my visit I have an explanation for for my mood change and outburst. I was told to take a few days off this week. Id like to meet you one day for a coffee or even lunch to give you these items and talk. I know you deleted and blocked me on social media, understandably. I have no idea if you blocked my number. Let me know. 
 

 

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ExpatInItaly

You’re conflating two issues in that text - returning her things, and attempting to get her back.

I would take out the part about seeing your doctor. Simply tell her that you have found some of her belongings and ask if she’d like to meet to retrieve them and if she’s open to hearing you out about how this all ended. 

I am going to guess the items don’t mean much to her of she likely wouldn’t have blocked you, ostensibly removing an avenue to get them back. 

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If she's wanted her belongings, why hasn't she contacted you?

Don't bother rationalizing your behavior with you medical update.

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Ok notes taken. When we got together I owned my own house and rented 2 rooms out to friends. Her and her sister had a long term lease on a condo that they were not allowed to sublet. I moved in there and rented out all 3 rooms at my house. Some of the items are just things nothing special. One is a necklace not only does it have monetary value but sentimental value. She lost it when we first started dating and she would spend time here. We tore both places apart trying to find it. I just found it as I was cleaning my old room up. I know she would love to have it back. 

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8 minutes ago, Solowon said:

I moved in there and rented out all 3 rooms at my house. 

Give notice to them and your tenant and move back into your own house. 

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4 minutes ago, Solowon said:

Already am moved back in to my own house 

Excellent. Notify her you have this item, but do not suggest coffee as a platform to reconcile. If she wants it she will reply/retrieve it.

Once it's over and you've moved out there's no point in having coffee.

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