Sarah123456789 Posted June 15, 2021 Share Posted June 15, 2021 So l start with saying this is a crazy situation.. my ex and l been together for over a year now. It was a very Rocky relationship, l think our characters just don’t match that great, but chemistry was amazing. Every time we fight he would do a silence treatment on purpose which would really annoy me, he knew that so well and kept doing it. I was always there for him, to the point that he would only use me for sex because he knew l would agree because l felt so much for him. We had a huge fight and he blocked me on WhatsApp, but kept my iMessage open. I texted, l.called him asking to talk, asking to sort things out but he just ignored me. Then he went to the police and failed a complaint that l am harassing him.. Long story short, l spend a night in cell because of him and l was so hurt, how can someone you love can do this. He’s now trying to contact me, what should l do. Even after what he’s done l feel things for him, but l don’t know if l can forgive.. Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted June 15, 2021 Share Posted June 15, 2021 The minute the police get involved it's over & there is no going back, EVER. He could be trying to entrap you. Have whatever lawyer is defending you against the criminal charges reach out & tell him to leave you alone. Once your lawyer gets whatever evidence that person needs from your devices, printed out hard copies & whatever electronic duplication necessary to defend you, block this guy on all platforms & never look back. Do not forgive him. He has to be out of your life completely or you will end up right back in jail. 5 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Sarah123456789 Posted June 15, 2021 Author Share Posted June 15, 2021 He lives next to me in my friends flat, we see etch other in the car park. Other day as l was leaving he just followed me.. I still have feelings for him, but l know what you are saying. Link to post Share on other sites
ShyViolet Posted June 15, 2021 Share Posted June 15, 2021 29 minutes ago, Sarah123456789 said: He’s now trying to contact me, what should l do. Even after what he’s done l feel things for him, but l don’t know if l can forgive.. Do you really honestly not know? When a relationship is this toxic, it needs to end. You shouldn't have any more contact with him. If you see him when you are out then just ignore him. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
xxcazaxx Posted June 15, 2021 Share Posted June 15, 2021 Avoid, avoid, avoid. Great advice from Donnivain about giving this evidence to lawyers Link to post Share on other sites
Author Sarah123456789 Posted June 15, 2021 Author Share Posted June 15, 2021 Yes l know and my brain says the same thing, but not my heart. It doesn’t help the fact that l see him daily.. I been going on dates, l met someone, but lm still thinking about my ex, l am sad the way things are and l just want him to at least apologise. If l post anything on my status he’s the first one to watch if he doesn’t care about me why is he doing it. Link to post Share on other sites
flitzanu Posted June 15, 2021 Share Posted June 15, 2021 14 minutes ago, Sarah123456789 said: Yes l know and my brain says the same thing, but not my heart. It doesn’t help the fact that l see him daily.. I been going on dates, l met someone, but lm still thinking about my ex, l am sad the way things are and l just want him to at least apologise. If l post anything on my status he’s the first one to watch if he doesn’t care about me why is he doing it. he doesn't care about you, he got you thrown in jail. 3 2 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted June 15, 2021 Share Posted June 15, 2021 53 minutes ago, Sarah123456789 said: Yes l know and my brain says the same thing, but not my heart. It doesn’t help the fact that l see him daily.. I been going on dates, l met someone, but lm still thinking about my ex, l am sad the way things are and l just want him to at least apologise. If l post anything on my status he’s the first one to watch if he doesn’t care about me why is he doing it. Stop listening to your heart. Listen to your brain. Do not engage with him. Make plans to move. Seriously. 3 1 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted June 16, 2021 Share Posted June 16, 2021 (edited) @Sarah123456789 -- why are you mad at my comment? Edited June 16, 2021 by a LoveShack.org Moderator clean up Link to post Share on other sites
spiderowl Posted June 16, 2021 Share Posted June 16, 2021 If he filed a complaint against you, then why should you forgive him and stay in touch with him? He didn't want you to stay in touch. If he has now changed his mind, then please think about why this is. One minute he is contacting the police about you; the next he is making contact with you. What does he want? From what you have said before, it seems you were the one who was keen on him and he just wanted sex. If that is the case, then of course he is coming back looking for sex. You are worth more than that. You need to teach men to treat you better. Never chase them and never plead for anything because a guy will lose respect for you. Once he loses respect, it is hard to regain it unless you teach him to treat you better. You can only do that by withdrawing your company from him until he treats you with love and respect. However, can you forgive him for reporting you? I wouldn't. It is a drastic thing to do and one of you must have been in a serious mental state to take it that far. Better to learn from this relationship and learn to care for and respect yourself so that you can have better relationships in the future. Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted June 16, 2021 Share Posted June 16, 2021 You two have zero chance of a future together. This was incredibly toxic and you spent a night in a jail for it. There is no coming back from this, depsite whatever dysfunctional dance you two might do for a little while. One or both of you will eventually meet someone else and leave the other in the dust. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted June 16, 2021 Share Posted June 16, 2021 On 6/15/2021 at 1:06 PM, Sarah123456789 said: Then he went to the police and failed a complaint that l am harassing him.. Ok, it's over. Just step way back and delete and block him from ALL devices, messaging apps and social media. get a handle on your intensity. Fight-and-screw relationships never work out, and usually end badly just like this because they are too highly charged and not based on compatibility. Link to post Share on other sites
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