stillafool Posted August 13, 2021 Share Posted August 13, 2021 23 minutes ago, Krystalheart said: We started talking 2 weeks ago , but now he is being distant with me again from last 3-4 days. I don't know if i am overthinking it but he was too good 3-4 days back ,he was talking to me for hours on call . But from last 3-4 days he is being little distant. If he's just a "friend" he can go 3-4 days or more without talking to you. You aren't a couple anymore just friends, remember. He talked for hours before to catch up. Now he's going about his business. Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted August 13, 2021 Share Posted August 13, 2021 3 minutes ago, Krystalheart said: But then he also says he can't see me with anyone else. Also he says it would be great if we will be together in future. It's difficult for anyone to "see" their recent ex with someone new but that doesn't mean they want you back. Also the future could be 5, 10, 15 years from now. He is looking forward to college and experiencing life. At his age that is what he's supposed to be doing and so should you. Stop contacting him to try to get back together. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Krystalheart Posted August 13, 2021 Author Share Posted August 13, 2021 @stillafool yeah 😞 so should i stop contacting again? Or should i take things slow until he feels like opening up again? Well i am confused after hearing him. Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted August 13, 2021 Share Posted August 13, 2021 (edited) 13 minutes ago, Krystalheart said: @d0nnivain but he said that it would be great if we will be together in future. He said he can't see himself moving on nor he can imagine me with someone else. More of the it's cruel to be kind. He said that because at the age of 19 he thinks that something may magically change in the future. He doesn't understand that college & growing up fundamentally change who a person is. Nobody is the same as an adult as they were in HS but since you two are still closer to HS than middle age, neither of you can see that. You are taking some casual words spoken by a child as an iron clad promise. They are pipe dreams with little chance of becoming reality. He knows it's false hope but he does it anyway because he has not yet matured enough to be direct. Anything he says to you other than "get the F away from me; I hate you" will be misinterpreted by you as the possibility of reconciliation because you are so desperate for that to happen. Go back to campus. Date a new guy at school. By Halloween you will have forgotten all about him. Stop contacting him. It's not about taking things slow. It's about leaving this alone. It's OVER Edited August 13, 2021 by d0nnivain 2 Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted August 13, 2021 Share Posted August 13, 2021 10 minutes ago, Krystalheart said: @d0nnivain but he said that it would be great if we will be together in future. He said he can't see himself moving on nor he can imagine me with someone else. That's because he knows you're fragile right now and he doesn't have the heart to be honest that he doesn't want to get back together. He's doing what a lot of dumpers do when they're trying to let their exes down, which is fill your head with empty words meant to soften the blow of rejection. If you are broken up, you can be sure he will eventually move on. He's not being sincere when he says he can't "see" himself doing so. He just doesnìt want to hurt your feelings even more by telling you that it will one day happen. The reality is that this is why you cannot be friends with him. He doesn't want to be in touch every day. He's fine going several days without talking to you, because he doesn't really want to be close to you. Krystalheart, you really need to cut contact. This is only hurting you. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted August 13, 2021 Share Posted August 13, 2021 6 minutes ago, Krystalheart said: so should i stop contacting again? Yes. It will hurt like hell if you insist on keeping in touch only to one day hear that he's met another girl. Because that is what's going to happen. Then you will kick yourself for not listening to the advice being given here. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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