How should someone react when someone dumps you? Act civil and 'wish them luck' in hopes of them being friends and coming back to you if things don't work out with the other?

[Katkats7777]

But still what about weddings? People say they love each other till death do us part. So marriage is a crock then? There is no such thing as marriage. I mean they say they love each other then what 5 years later divorce? Why believe in marriage then?

Edited June 25, 2021 by Katkats7777

[stillafool]

17 minutes ago, Katkats7777 said:

I get maybe he doesn't owe me any further explanations, but when one spends the night, watches movies, cuddles, does those kind of things, someone deserves answers.

People do that stuff all the time without even agreeing to a one on one relationship.  He's already given you the answer - he met someone else and asked her to be in a relationship.

[stillafool]

17 minutes ago, Katkats7777 said:

But still what about weddings? People say they love each other till death do us part. So marriage is a crock then? There is no such thing as marriage. I mean they say they love each other then what 5 years later divorce? Why believe in marriage then?

Most people who plan a wedding together are in love and want to be together for life.  Sometimes it doesn't work out and they divorce.  What does this have to do with your situation?  You guys weren't that serious about each other.  Plus you don't have to believe in marriage - many don't.

Edited June 25, 2021 by stillafool

[Happy Lemming]

1 hour ago, Katkats7777 said:

The last thing sentence i said to him was, “i just need some closure then i’ll go.”

 

1 hour ago, introverted1 said:

He doesn't owe you any further explanations. 

 

I agree with @introverted1...  He doesn't owe you an explanation or closure. 

I give him credit for telling you he wanted to pursue another woman.  Most guys would use some stale old line like "I don't think we are compatible - long term" or "it's not you... it's me" or "I'm not in a good place, right now" or some other BS. 

I really do think your guy told you he truth, that he prefers this other woman over you.

[Wiseman2]

5 hours ago, Katkats7777 said:

I know where he lives so what is he going to have police surrounding his property now?

No, he'll have you arrested for trespassing, harassment, stalking etc.. Then he'll have a nice relationship and you'll have expensive legal costs and an arrest record.

Have you seen the movie "Fatal Attraction"?  You need to get a handle on the bunnyboiler situation.

Is 28 weeks of dating worth all this drama?

[ExpatInItaly]

5 hours ago, Katkats7777 said:

someone deserves answers.

Deserving answers does not mean you will ever get answers, OP. 

You can't force it out of someone. You have to accept that. 

[Katkats7777]

10 hours ago, Happy Lemming said:

 

I agree with @introverted1...  He doesn't owe you an explanation or closure. 

I give him credit for telling you he wanted to pursue another woman.  Most guys would use some stale old line like "I don't think we are compatible - long term" or "it's not you... it's me" or "I'm not in a good place, right now" or some other BS. 

I really do think your guy told you he truth, that he prefers this other woman over you.

I dont understand why he would pursue another woman. It couldnt have been sex, i mean he told me he enjoyed it. And he loved it when i gave him head

[SumGuy]

Simple answer is he lied to you and led you on to monkeybranch. 
 

The best revenge is to just live well.  He is not worth one more ounce of your energy or one more minute of thought.  
He’s a d**che bag, lucky you found out early. 

[Happy Lemming]

1 hour ago, Katkats7777 said:

I dont understand why he would pursue another woman. It couldnt have been sex, i mean he told me he enjoyed it. And he loved it when i gave him head

As I stated up thread... it could be one of any reasons why he picked this other woman over you.  It could be he thinks she is prettier or she may make more money than you (and spend it on him) or he could just be wanting some variety in life and decided he wants someone different.

Many years ago, I was dating two women and decided one just made me happier over the other one.  It was strictly personal preference. 

I'm sure you were the best person you could be and that wasn't good enough for your ex-boyfriend, so he took up with another woman. 

You need to stop beating yourself up over this... people come and go throughout our lives, very few stay (long-term).  It really is just part of dating.

[Katkats7777]

2 hours ago, Happy Lemming said:

As I stated up thread... it could be one of any reasons why he picked this other woman over you.  It could be he thinks she is prettier or she may make more money than you (and spend it on him) or he could just be wanting some variety in life and decided he wants someone different.

Many years ago, I was dating two women and decided one just made me happier over the other one.  It was strictly personal preference. 

I'm sure you were the best person you could be and that wasn't good enough for your ex-boyfriend, so he took up with another woman. 

You need to stop beating yourself up over this... people come and go throughout our lives, very few stay (long-term).  It really is just part of dating.

Do you think it had anything to do with our age difference? I’m older than him

Edited June 26, 2021 by Katkats7777

[Happy Lemming]

14 minutes ago, Katkats7777 said:

Do you think it had anything to do with our age difference? I’m older than him

It's possible... How much older are we talking about?? 

I do know that most guys (not all) prefer women their age or younger.

 

[Katkats7777]

8 minutes ago, Happy Lemming said:

It's possible... How much older are we talking about?? 

I do know that most guys (not all) prefer women their age or younger.

 

Its a 19 year age difference, and that he wanted to pursue a girl at his school. But when he first met me he said he always wanted to get a girl at my age

[Happy Lemming]

25 minutes ago, Katkats7777 said:

Its a 19 year age difference, and that he wanted to pursue a girl at his school.

19 years is a HUGE age difference.  There is no mystery here, he wanted to date a woman his age or younger.

27 minutes ago, Katkats7777 said:

 But when he first met me he said he always wanted to get a girl at my age

Yes... he lied and told you what you wanted to hear so he could have sex with you.

[introverted1]

6 hours ago, Katkats7777 said:

Its a 19 year age difference, and that he wanted to pursue a girl at his school. But when he first met me he said he always wanted to get a girl at my age

So he's in school (early 20's) and you are a grown woman (40s)? Old enough to be his mother...

You had to know from the beginning that this was just a temporary thing. He said it himself - he wanted to experience sex with an older woman.  He's done that, and now he's moved on.

Collect your dignity and let it go.

[HiCrunchy]

Ummm with that age difference, u have ur answers. 

[Katkats7777]

1 hour ago, introverted1 said:

So he's in school (early 20's) and you are a grown woman (40s)? Old enough to be his mother...

You had to know from the beginning that this was just a temporary thing. He said it himself - he wanted to experience sex with an older woman.  He's done that, and now he's moved on.

Collect your dignity and let it go.

He’s in a frat so he had to bring a date to this formal dance last month. He didnt tell me anything about it until i saw his snap story pictured with a girl. I confronted him about it and asked if he was dating her he told me no, that shes just a friend. I asked him why i wasnt his date and he replied,”because you would feel out of place with those girls being 18-22.” Is he being logically about this ? I told him i wouldnt feel weird about it, and that he didnt know. Besides i still look like I'm in my late 20’s anyway. Then like last week i saw his snap story with the same girl to what looked like they were outside at a swimming pool late at night. 
 

i didnt think it was going to last this long though. I met him before thanksgiving, so i figured when he went back to school things would fizzle but no
 

aren’t there posts on here how young guys date older women? Was it an age thing or him just choosing to be with someone else?

Edited June 26, 2021 by Katkats7777

[introverted1]

8 minutes ago, Katkats7777 said:

 Was it an age thing or him just choosing to be with someone else?

Yes to both.

You were a novelty and now that he's had the experience he wants to have other experiences, which is pretty typical/normal for a guy in college.

 

[Katkats7777]

23 minutes ago, introverted1 said:

Yes to both.

You were a novelty and now that he's had the experience he wants to have other experiences, which is pretty typical/normal for a guy in college.

 

But wouldnt the sex keep him around? We been at it for 7 months, i imagined it was good for him. He told me he was always horny for me,and that i was good at it

[introverted1]

1 minute ago, Katkats7777 said:

But wouldnt the sex keep him around? We been at it for 7 months, i imagined it was good for him. He told me he was always horny for me,and that i was good at it

🙄

Really?  You think that there aren't plenty of college girls who are "good at" sex?

And 20yo guys are pretty much always horny. 

Look, he's told you it's over.  Believe him. 

 

[ExpatInItaly]

4 hours ago, Katkats7777 said:

But wouldnt the sex keep him around? We been at it for 7 months, i imagined it was good for him. He told me he was always horny for me,and that i was good at it

No, not if he met someone he liked more and felt more compatible with. And yes, the age gap was almost definitely a factor as well. At your age (and I imagine you and I are relatively close in age), you know better than this. 

I don't mean to be unkind, but you were fooling yourself if you thought a romance with 20-year-younger frat boy was going to go the distance. It was always going to be short-lived. 

[ExpatInItaly]

4 hours ago, Katkats7777 said:

I asked him why i wasnt his date and he replied,”because you would feel out of place with those girls being 18-22.” Is he being logically about this ? I told him i wouldnt feel weird about it,

He felt weird about it. 

[stillafool]

22 hours ago, Katkats7777 said:

I dont understand why he would pursue another woman. It couldnt have been sex, i mean he told me he enjoyed it. And he loved it when i gave him head

He was probably telling you the truth.  However he had sex with the new girl too.  He asked her to be his gf because she captured his emotions. 

[basil67]

Oh hon, you gave him his MILF fantasy and he loved it.  But it's now time for him to move on and go back to dating his peers.

 

[stillafool]

10 hours ago, Katkats7777 said:

But wouldnt the sex keep him around? We been at it for 7 months, i imagined it was good for him. He told me he was always horny for me,and that i was good at i

He was probably telling you the truth.  However a lot of young guys want to sleep with an older woman to get experience with sex.  Once they get that experience they take it  and use it on a young woman to keep her.  This happens all the time.  I can't believe you got serious over this guy.  Your downfall was getting serious about him when you should have just enjoyed the sex.  After what you've said about the age difference please don't show up at his house or you will be embarrassed.

 

[stillafool]

12 hours ago, Katkats7777 said:

Besides i still look like I'm in my late 20’s anyway.

LOL, this reminds me of Wanda Skye's comedy routine where she says her and her friends were at a party feeling and looking like 25 year olds.....she said "until the real 25 year olds showed up."