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Ladies: Ever change your mind about going out with a guy and was thankful for it?


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I've heard stories about how couples (even married ones) have met where the man would continue to contact her more than once. Now...I'm not talking about blowing up her phone or whatever, as it's kind of circumstantial. You could say he'd give her a try ever month or two. Sometimes a year would pass and he'd try again.

Somehow the lady changed her mind, gave the guy a shot, and was thankful she did.

For instance, I've heard women say they gave their numbers to dudes, only to purposely ignore the text or phone call. The guys would wait a month, call again, still ignore. I recall a woman saying her current husband did this, and then she bumped into him in person (perhaps that changed the dynamic?)...and he asked her out...again.

She said "I was skeptical at first, but I gave him a shot"

A few years later, wedding bells, kids, the rest is history.

However, it could just turn into a "Ew, creepy stalker guy found me here!"  Then you're labeled a creepy stalker for persisting, or just creepy if you don't bump into each other in person.

Anyways, has there ever been any situations that you knew of, where some woman was on the fence about going out with a guy, but it took a few tries on his part to sway you into going out with him?

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Nope.  back when I was dating, my “no” was final.  And if I’d said no and he kept trying, I found it highly disrespectful and it would then become “Nooooo”

I can’t say that I’m aware of any women who has ended up changing her mind.  Most of us know very quickly whether or not we are into a guy.

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No. Only when I decided not to get together with someone, when I'd been really excited about the idea. 

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CaliforniaGirl

I hate to say it, but no. Twice I allowed this, and both times were pretty disastrous. IMO we women are trained not to trust our instincts, so we go against them, and lo and behold, what we thought wouldn't work out, doesn't, except now we've wasted time and gone through pain. Not every time, but well, often enough. 

JME! I'm sure somebody will have a different experience than these to share.

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Just the opposite, OP. Didn't listen to my instincts and went out with him anyway. Disaster. 

Best to listen to your instincts even the other way around (if you're asking someone out or on the fence).

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11 hours ago, CaliforniaGirl said:

I hate to say it, but no. Twice I allowed this, and both times were pretty disastrous. IMO we women are trained not to trust our instincts, so we go against them, and lo and behold, what we thought wouldn't work out, doesn't, except now we've wasted time and gone through pain. Not every time, but well, often enough. 

JME! I'm sure somebody will have a different experience than these to share.

Hm, judging by the responses here, it sounds like the decision wasn't based on the physical, but the character of saidman.

I was kind of basing it off that. Like say, if you're not attracted to shorter men, but decided to give him a shot because he was a decent man.

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CaliforniaGirl
5 hours ago, QuietRiot said:

Hm, judging by the responses here, it sounds like the decision wasn't based on the physical, but the character of saidman.

I was kind of basing it off that. Like say, if you're not attracted to shorter men, but decided to give him a shot because he was a decent man.

Why don’t you tell us why you’re asking? What’s the situation? 

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Lotsgoingon

Yes, more detail would help us answer your question.

I'm a guy, and yes, I've hit on people I passed by the first time. But whenever I did that, I was really desperate. I wouldn't recommend that path to anyone. Things never really worked out. My instincts were good the first time. 

Now it is possible for someone to grow on us, but usually that's without willing it. You run into someone, somewhat like them but nothing strong. Then two year later you run into them again, the this time you click. That's happened to me. But that's not intellectual work. When I finally got interested, I was REALLY interested. 

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  • 4 weeks later...
Love Yourself First

I would advise everyone to read the posts in here and become familiar with how important a first impression is, make or break in almost all cases I would say.

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