Is it abuse?

[a little lost]

I've been in a relationship with Dave for about 10 months and love him very much.

 

He pursued me very intently for a month before I ever went out with him and we feel in love within a few months. He and I get along well and are very happy most of the time. However hes rather selfish about his plans for the future. He wants to move from Hawaii, where we live now, to Kentucky to go to school and I don't. His reason being that he can go to school for very cheap because he owns a house there. He once said he loved me enough to wait a few years but now he wants to leave at the end of August with or without me and doesn't want a long distance relationship.

 

He has "let me go" three times since we started going out. Always over his unhappiness in his current carrier and Hawaii vs. my love of Hawaii and insecurity about Kentucky. I have tried to suggest other places but he doesn't think are any other options. We are currently on the not going part but I know he will try to come back. Its like torture when he leaves me and I honestly am thinking about not going back to him but I love him so damn much.

 

Is his leaving abuse? If I go back am I assuring that he will do it again?

[sarah]

It sounds like he cares for you, but he has priorities that come before your relationship.

 

If he has left you 3 times before, yes, he will do it again. If you accept that behavior you are telling him you will be there the next time he dumps you and comes back. (Been there, done that.) Decide what is going to make you happy, hopefully not someone that will leave you, and look for someone with compatible goals that will be there with you. How would you feel in Kentucky when he left for whatever reason?

I've been in a relationship with Dave for about 10 months and love him very much. He pursued me very intently for a month before I ever went out with him and we feel in love within a few months. He and I get along well and are very happy most of the time. However hes rather selfish about his plans for the future. He wants to move from Hawaii, where we live now, to Kentucky to go to school and I don't. His reason being that he can go to school for very cheap because he owns a house there. He once said he loved me enough to wait a few years but now he wants to leave at the end of August with or without me and doesn't want a long distance relationship.

 

He has "let me go" three times since we started going out. Always over his unhappiness in his current carrier and Hawaii vs. my love of Hawaii and insecurity about Kentucky. I have tried to suggest other places but he doesn't think are any other options. We are currently on the not going part but I know he will try to come back. Its like torture when he leaves me and I honestly am thinking about not going back to him but I love him so damn much. Is his leaving abuse? If I go back am I assuring that he will do it again?