How much will a tattoo lower my dating options

[Wiseman2]

10 hours ago, Cookiesandough said:

  On Reddit, which is a pretty ‘progressive’ community

You can always put it off until you're sure about it, graduated, secured a job and have the money for it.

Most people don't regret them.

 

[Taramere]

13 hours ago, Cookiesandough said:

So not trying to brag, but I have a lot of dating options at the moment. I don’t know why I’m so popping right now, but I’m going with it. 
 

I have a shallow problem.  I want a tattoo really bad!!. I have my entire life. Ideally I want more than one too but I think I should start with one. I want to get it on my forearm which is kind of a revealing spot( I really don’t see the point in getting it in a highly concealed spot anyway.) I have it picked out and I’m ready. 

The only time I considered getting a tattoo, I was in my mid twenties, in a really good place and just generally having a very fun, exciting time.  I think I contemplated getting a tattoo because I knew it was a special time in my life, and I wanted to mark it.  Although I don't regret not going ahead and getting a tattoo, equally I don't think I'd have regretted getting one done.  It sounds as though you're in an exciting phase and maybe there's that element of "I want to mark this time in my life. I want to wear some visible memory of it for the rest of my life."  In the end I didn't get one done because generally I'm not a huge fan of tattoos and I thought at the time that I'd probably regret it later on.  I don't think I would have done though.  Looking back, that really was a special and wonderful period in my life and if ever there was a phase I'd want a permanent marker of, that would be it.

There are hundreds of things about us and the choices/statements we make that will result in some people putting us into boxes....but the people who put us into boxes and dismiss us would probably do that to a certain extent, regardless of our choices. If a small tattoo that's meaningful to you is enough for a guy to dismiss you and say "next" then he'd have probably found a reason to do that sooner or later anyway.  I suppose you could say that in some cases a man's religion might preclude him from considering a tattooed woman.  But even then, I think that would be largely dependent on the meanings he extracted from his religion and the way he prioritised those meanings. 

[Blind-Sided]

First.... it's not shallow by any means.   But society still judges people for things like this. So... really consider it.

1) Why do you want a tattoo?   You say you really want one... but you don't say why.  If you want one for the sake of wanting it... then you shouldn't get it. (maybe why your ex BF said not to)  I've known WAY too many people who walk into a tattoo shop, and point at a picture on the wall... an say... put that on my ankle.  Those people just want a tat to say... "Yes... I have ink".  

2) You don't know where life will take you... so consider that a small thing could be deal breaker.  Both in love, and in career.  I had a cousin who had a big scar on the inside of his forearm.  (he had a bunch of random tat's) When I asked him about it... he said he worked at a catholic hospital for a while, and to get the job, he had to get a tat removed. (They offered to do it for free)  He didn't really care about that one... and agreed.  BUT... it very well could have been a deal breaker.  Even he told me if I ever got one... put it where it can be covered, and consider the subject matter. 

On that note... the lady who lives next door to me is a middle school teacher, and has a thin cursive tat of her kids names on her forearm.  It's elegant, and meaningful to her.  The local schools don't care about that kind of tat.  But... if it was a tat of flames, and the devil in the same location... then she would be out of a job... or would have to always wear long sleeves.

It seems like my entire family has tattoos... even my 72 yo mother.  She is a "Norman Rockwell" picture of a grandmother.  She wears conservatives clothes, and normally has a cardigan over a blouse, and pearl, or small gold ear rings.  Never wears t-shirts, or tank tops.... but yet... her entire back is done in a cherry tree that is blossoming, and the branches have names of our family.  It has deep meaning to her... and it is covered almost all the time, unless she wants to show it to someone.  My dad, and brother don't have anything past a half sleeve. SO a normal shirt can cover it. 

Finally... just accept that if you get a tat... and you put it in a very public place... you will be judged, and it will destroy some possibilities in life.  (love, friends, and career) 

[Miss Spider]

Thank you all for your opinions & getting better image of some fonts here & their ink 😊.Thanks for the help. I’ve decided against getting a tattoo between yesterday evening and this morning, so I guess you could say that I am not ready for this commitment

[basil67]

I think that's smart @Cookiesandough .  When in doubt, don't.

Only get inked if you are 100% sure and have been sure for a substantial amount of time. 

[Foxhall]

I used to dislike them on a woman, but have changed my mind recently,

Yeah I think they show a bit of sass and attitude,

still a natural beauty is always a favourite.

[Blind-Sided]

Hey @Cookiesandough

OK... I know you said you made up your mind... but I have a new story for you.  

Today, I was with my GF.  She has a bunch of tats.... but for the most part... its in her lower parts.  Most of them on legs... but she has one on her butt, and a couple on her sides.  Nothing on her chest, arms, neck or face.  I think it's cute when she wears a dress.  She is clean, and cute up top... but her legs are almost fully done. (FYI, I've asked her to not do her chest, arms or neck, because it's a turn off even for me) 

Anyway... today we were in a local Italian market, and she had on a dress.  We heard a mother behind us say to her teen age boy.... "Look at that crap  !!  is that really what you want to turn into?"   The lady was being a total b****... and her kid said... "Yes, it's cool".   But when we left the store, my GF was on the verge of tears.  She really likes her ink, and has spent a lot of money on it.  She asked me why do people have to be that way... and I told her... she made a choice that will make people judge her.  I comforted her, and said that lady was a prude, and shouldn't have said it so loud... but the truth is the truth.  I also said if she went for a more "Professional" job... she would need to wear dark leggings with her dresses... otherwise the interview may be over before it even starts. 

Edited August 13, 2021 by Blind-Sided

[basil67]

@Blind-Sided how horrible for your girlfriend.  It just goes as a reminder that being a nice person with ink is a whole lot preferable to being a horrible clean skin.

Edited August 13, 2021 by basil67

[glows]

 

1 hour ago, Blind-Sided said:

Hey @Cookiesandough

OK... I know you said you made up your mind... but I have a new story for you.  

Today, I was with my GF.  She has a bunch of tats.... but for the most part... its in her lower parts.  Most of them on legs... but she has one on her butt, and a couple on her sides.  Nothing on her chest, arms, neck or face.  I think it's cute when she wears a dress.  She is clean, and cute up top... but her legs are almost fully done. (FYI, I've asked her to not do her chest, arms or neck, because it's a turn off even for me) 

Anyway... today we were in a local Italian market, and she had on a dress.  We heard a mother behind us say to her teen age boy.... "Look at that crap  !!  is that really what you want to turn into?"   The lady was being a total b****... and her kid said... "Yes, it's cool".   But when we left the store, my GF was on the verge of tears.  She really likes her ink, and has spent a lot of money on it.  She asked me why do people have to be that way... and I told her... she made a choice that will make people judge her.  I comforted her, and said that lady was a prude, and shouldn't have said it so loud... but the truth is the truth.  I also said if she went for a more "Professional" job... she would need to wear dark leggings with her dresses... otherwise the interview may be over before it even starts. 

I too am sorry she had to encounter such treatment and small minded behaviour. Yes, people like this are ugly on the inside. They create their own problems so I leave them to it.

Edited August 13, 2021 by glows

[basil67]

41 minutes ago, glows said:

They create their own problems so I leave them to it.

You are more controlled than me.  I have been known to shred people like this to pieces.   Only a couple of times, but they were being so mean about things which had nothing to do with them.   

Edited August 13, 2021 by basil67

[glows]

54 minutes ago, basil67 said:

You are more controlled than me.  I have been known to shred people like this to pieces.   Only a couple of times, but they were being so mean about things which had nothing to do with them.   

I hear you. Sometimes people project way too far and assume too much. Usually I'm more preoccupied with changing course and avoiding that person or adjusting my view of that person. 

I find a lot of backhanded comments demeaning. They are not outright insults that may warrant a retort but they still serve to devalue someone with art or body mods. There are some things also I won't do but I celebrate anytime anyone feels liberated enough to express themselves.

[Wiseman2]

Yes it's no longer rebellious. Just a fashion statement.   More women have tattoos now than men.

About 40% of Americans have tattoos. Only 30% state they regret it.

[basil67]

2 hours ago, Wiseman2 said:

About 40% of Americans have tattoos. Only 30% state they regret it.

Funny!

[Wiseman2]

11 minutes ago, basil67 said:

Funny!

True. But overall it's a sad statement that anyone needs to ask what body modifications they should or shouldn't have to attract more male attention.

[Taramere]

6 hours ago, Blind-Sided said:

Anyway... today we were in a local Italian market, and she had on a dress.  We heard a mother behind us say to her teen age boy.... "Look at that crap  !!  is that really what you want to turn into?"  

That teenage boy was likely mortified by his mother's rudeness.  That comment of hers practically guarantees her son will be giving the local tattoo artist his business as soon as he has the means.

[Timshel]

7 hours ago, Blind-Sided said:

Anyway... today we were in a local Italian market, and she had on a dress.  We heard a mother behind us say to her teen age boy.... "Look at that crap  !!  is that really what you want to turn into?"   The lady was being a total b****... and her kid said... "Yes, it's cool".  

 

5 hours ago, basil67 said:

You are more controlled than me.  I have been known to shred people like this to pieces.   Only a couple of times, but they were being so mean about things which had nothing to do with them.   

In general, people will defend their choices, values and opinions but easily berate/demean other's for theirs. Avoiding hypocrisy requires effort and is typically a bridge too far, lol.

If a lifestyle choice isn't hurtful to a person or others, I see no reason to act or speak against it. There are real problems in the world to rail against. Who knows what activities this mom is engaged in that other people would disapprove. One that jumps out at me is spewing disgust toward and hurting a stranger who has done nothing to her and has zero effect on her own life. Idiot hypocrite.

A tattoo is your body/your choice Cookiesandough.

[basil67]

 

2 hours ago, Wiseman2 said:

True. But overall it's a sad statement that anyone needs to ask what body modifications they should or shouldn't have to attract more male attention.

How does this comment relate to your joke about x amount of people wanting tattoos removed?  It reads like a segue from a joke to a jab.

[Miss Spider]

1 hour ago, basil67 said:

 

How does this comment relate to your joke about x amount of people wanting tattoos removed?  It reads like a segue from a joke to a jab.

And wasn’t even my question xD wiseman2 always does this, though. It’s okay. We still love wiseman2.

Edited August 13, 2021 by Cookiesandough

[glows]

1 hour ago, basil67 said:

 

How does this comment relate to your joke about x amount of people wanting tattoos removed?  It reads like a segue from a joke to a jab.

That’s exactly the kind of comment I was talking about. 

[Interstellar]

have at it. put it anywhere or all over except your lower back. it’s played out already. 

only kidding, it’s your body. 

Edited August 14, 2021 by Interstellar

[Wiseman2]

On 8/13/2021 at 7:50 AM, basil67 said:

How does this comment relate to your joke about x amount of people wanting tattoos removed? 

Not a 'joke' a statistic based on surveys.

Edited August 14, 2021 by Wiseman2

[basil67]

5 hours ago, Wiseman2 said:

Not a 'joke' a statistic based on surveys.

And what surveys would these be?   I don't know anyone who regrets their ink.

[Wiseman2]

8 hours ago, basil67 said:

And what surveys would these be?   I don't know anyone who regrets their ink.

You can google "percent of people who regret tattoos" and pick whatever source of info you're most comfortable with.

Here's just an example:

https://www.healthline.com/health/tattoo-regret

Edited August 15, 2021 by Wiseman2

[basil67]

@Wiseman2  I did look up that question and the first page or two of my results had no credible research.  There was research on people who do regret their tattoos, and blogs too.  But I found no credible research into what percentage of people who have tattoos regret their tattoos.

As for the link you gave me, the study linked in the article was done by a tattoo removal clinic (bias much?) and surveyed those who already have tattoo regret. It said that 3 out of 4 people who regret their tattoo hadn't planned it for more than a few weeks.    At no point does it say that 3/4 people regret their tattoos.  

Edited August 15, 2021 by basil67

[Wiseman2]

42 minutes ago, basil67 said:

@Wiseman2   At no point does it say that 3/4 people regret their tattoos.  

At no point did I say that either so what's your attack all about?

I mentioned "only 30% regret getting them". 30 % is not 75% so not sure why you are detailing with your attacks.