Monica1609_ Posted August 20, 2021 Share Posted August 20, 2021 I have been dating a guy for the past 2-3 months, we get along so well and we see each other like once a week. Some days ago, I asked him if he was looking for something serious and he told me that he want things to work out between us but is a little too soon to know and he doesn’t know if we are going to be husband or wife or if we are going to end up being nothing. We didn’t discuss anything about exclusivity but he told me he is not seeing anyone else. There is another guy, I haven’t see him in like a month because some circumstances but he wants to see me again and I think he is going serious. I don’t want to have my hopes up and then be disappointed with the first guy but I don’t know if dating the second one would be something wrong for me to do. Link to post Share on other sites
NYAG Posted August 21, 2021 Share Posted August 21, 2021 I don't know why we always have to fixate on the end point so soon. 2-3 months is a very short time to be talking about the possibilities of getting married to someone or being serious long term. Either of these guys could work out. Neither of them might work out and at this point you can't tell who's going to follow through with that. If you're looking to date only with longevity in mind (or maybe that's what you want to avoid) then you won't be able to tell now no matter what they tell you because anything can happen no matter the intention, and the chances are whichever one you pick could end up being the wrong one. The question is, who do you like the best now. And if he's not a wrong'un go with him. Link to post Share on other sites
Blind-Sided Posted August 21, 2021 Share Posted August 21, 2021 You are living in a unrealistic mindset. You aren't even truly open with each other yet. 3 mo... there is no way to know. Also... multi dating is NOT for someone who is looking to get married. You will not focus on one person... and could ruin something good. So... since your goal is to get married... focus on one person, and see where it goes. If it's not working out, break up, and move on. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted August 21, 2021 Share Posted August 21, 2021 Seeing each other 2-3 months of course nobody knows if you are destined for marriage. You will figure that out in 2-3 years. If you like him & want to give this a fighting chance, since he's not seeing anybody else you should not either. If you go out with the other guy, this guy will bolt. Link to post Share on other sites
Caauug Posted August 22, 2021 Share Posted August 22, 2021 On 8/21/2021 at 5:06 AM, Monica1609_ said: We didn’t discuss anything about exclusivity He's not setting boundaries for you. This shows his lack of interest or ignorance if he thinks there is not have a back up suiter in the wings... You are clear to date who ever you want when ever you want. Just wait at the "Finish line".... Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted August 24, 2021 Share Posted August 24, 2021 OK so you fished for an answer, you got one, and it's definitely a no. Go with other guy....the one that actually is more serious. You are not losing any opportunity with negative guy. He's made it clear, it's not going any further. Time to move onto more promising pastures. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
glows Posted August 24, 2021 Share Posted August 24, 2021 I'd only determine if the care and interest is mutual/reciprocal or at a similar level. It is natural to lose interest automatically in someone if the other side is lukewarm and ambivalent. Don't feel guilty for wanting more. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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