My divorced female supervisor I just met says her touching and innuendo comments are only her being just friendly in only 2 months time, I 100% say she was harassing me and hitting on me, any ideas ?

[chevellecobra]

She says I took the following things the wrong way and i say B.S. and i've never been through this before and am worried what to do :

Within the first week she and i started talking about how we both use to work at the same company at different times and how working at this new company was a refreshing and relaxed change and while we were talking, she started rubbing the middle of my back straight up and down with her hand and that's the day that it started.

After that she has come up from behind me 3 different times and put both her hands around my neck for making a data entry mistake, patted me on the back as she walked by me, and started bumping her hand on my thigh to talk to me.

She's asked me to dance with her in the warehouse in front of coworkers and even asked if i was going to whip her one day when my belt broke loose while putting boxes on a skid for inventory.

When i was putting boxes on a skid one day the bottom of a box broke open letting glass bottles break on the floor and when she seen it, she told me to come over to her and she playfully slapped me.

This last time i was bubble wrapping glass bottles for protection for shipping and i had a large roll of bubble wrap at my feet on the floor i was using and she came over to help on the other side of the roller conveyor and looked at me and said gimme some, so when i started to bend down to get her the bubble wrap, she said to me, If you think i'm going anywhere near down there to get the bubble wrap from you, your crazy, well, i didn't say anything to her but, just looked at her confused and was saying to myself, i wasn't expecting you to go down at my feet to get the bubble wrap but, i felt she was implying something else.

[d0nnivain]

She's crossing lines.  

You need to make it clear to her that all touching in the workplace is inappropriate as far as you are concerned & that you would prefer she refrain from touching you from now on.  If she reiterates that she was just kidding around, tell her that now she knows your boundaries & you trust she will be professional going forward.  

[Wiseman2]

1 hour ago, chevellecobra said:

when she seen it, she told me to come over to her and she playfully slapped me.

How old is she? Is she attractive? Is she divorced, married, single? 

She seems a bit wacky. Yes it could be construed as sexual harassment.

Does she flirt with other men in the workplace?

Make sure you don't have any contact outside of work including anything but work email. 

[chevellecobra]

She's been divorced only one year, 48 years old and never had kids, she has red hair, freckles, thin and average looking and in 2 months I've never noticed her doing anything thing like this with anybody else, she's the boss in my receiving department, very flirtatious with 24 years experience.

I don't won't to get involved with her and have not laid a finger on her, I'm just in disbelief why she's doing this to me, I've never had this happen before but, I've worked with my family mostly and never had a female boss till now

Edited September 16, 2021 by chevellecobra
more information

[glows]

Are you married or with someone? Report it to HR and keep your distance. Ignore her and respond with dry comments only about work.

[chevellecobra]

I'm single but, I want the job not her and she just keeps on making passes at me, You'd think with her experience she'd know better, she's not afraid of nothing.

[glows]

6 minutes ago, chevellecobra said:

I'm single but, I want the job not her and she just keeps on making passes at me, You'd think with her experience she'd know better, she's not afraid of nothing.

Again, report it to HR. Ignore her. It doesn't matter what she's afraid of or not (not your job to threaten her or create a scene). It's clear her behaviour is inappropriate. Just focus on your work if you need the job. 

[chevellecobra]

Thanks, It's going to be difficult, I've never had a women act this handsy before this quick.

[pureinheart]

Dude, this is disgusting and demeaning on so many levels... no one should have to put up with that... 

Back in the day I was harassed quite a bit at work, although didn't like going to HR, so took matters into my own hands which proved to be very effective. I would confront the person asking the person to stop what they were doing, if that didn't work I'd tell one of my big/large friends and they would 'have a talk' with that person... the latter always worked. I know it sounds bad involving someone else, although my friends were more than happy to assist.

Good luck to you and I hope your supervisor gets a grip- she sounds like she has few boundaries and needs counseling, as that behavior is completely unacceptable.

[Caauug]

On 9/17/2021 at 4:54 AM, chevellecobra said:

I don't won't to get involved with her and have not laid a finger on her, I'm just in disbelief why she's doing this to me, I've never had this happen before but, I've worked with my family mostly and never had a female boss till now

Be very careful.... If you complain to HR she will likely come up with a story about you making moves on her but she thought she had you straightened out without HR involvement, this is just you retaliating... This is you wanting to climb the ladder quickly... She's a female and a supervisor....Who would HR believe when she has first crack at defense? Just because it should be fair doesn't mean it's going to be. Last thing you want is this following you around. 

She may not even be interested in you, maybe she is bating you to make a move so she can shoot you down.... Like on a power trip of sorts.... Don't trust her, keep distance and keep your conversations short and professional, yes and no answers where ever possible.

Make yourself unattractive to her. 

Never ever get involved with someone you work with. When it all turns "pear shaped" you are stuck working with the same person.

[stillafool]

This is so unfair because if she was a man and you were a woman she would lose her job.  I've worked places where women have sexually harrassed young men,  they didn't like it but nothing was done about it.  I don't know what is wrong with those women.

[chevellecobra]

How she see's this as friendly in only 2 months time is unbelievable to me, I don't think there would be any women at work who would let me do this to them.

Maybe if two people knew each other for a long time but, not just meeting someone, you're still strangers.

I'm just going to quit, this isn't worth the mental torture everyday especially if i report her, I'll have to watch my back everyday.

[Wiseman2]

4 hours ago, chevellecobra said:

I'm just going to quit,

Good call. Line something up, then resign. Sounds like a weird workplace culture.

[chevellecobra]

One other thing i've never had a boss say to me was when I was getting ready to go home one night, she told me she wanted me to be happy at work and well rested when coming to work.

I've never had a boss say that before.

[Noproblem]

On 9/27/2021 at 4:16 PM, chevellecobra said:

One other thing i've never had a boss say to me was when I was getting ready to go home one night, she told me she wanted me to be happy at work and well rested when coming to work.

I've never had a boss say that before.

is that harassment?

[Noproblem]

I would tell her. I don't like strangers touching me, no offense to you or any other. Can you please refrain from doing that!

If she didn't, either report or quit!

Sorry that this happened to you!

[Noproblem]

On 9/26/2021 at 12:39 PM, chevellecobra said:

How she see's this as friendly in only 2 months time is unbelievable to me, I don't think there would be any women at work who would let me do this to them.

Maybe if two people knew each other for a long time but, not just meeting someone, you're still strangers.

I'm just going to quit, this isn't worth the mental torture everyday especially if i report her, I'll have to watch my back everyday.

try to find a good job first, then quit!

 

[stillafool]

I shutter at what would happen if a male supervisor were putting his hands on a female and rubbing her back, making her uncomfortable.  Women should be held to the same standards.  She's disgusting.

[chevellecobra]

I quit last month but, I went ahead and reported her but, they just laughed me out the door, her 20 plus years experience made her untouchable to me.

[Noproblem]

On 10/24/2021 at 5:42 PM, chevellecobra said:

I quit last month but, I went ahead and reported her but, they just laughed me out the door, her 20 plus years experience made her untouchable to me.

such a sad reaction from them. You reported her and they laughed, did they investigate it further or informed her or anything

 

 

Edited October 26, 2021 by Noproblem

[basil67]

I'm sorry this happened.  But did they literally laugh at you?  Or did they simply dismiss your concerns?

[chevellecobra]

No, They did nothing to her, I worked everyday and days I didn't have to work and that's how much I loved my job, I'm really screwed up over it too and they wouldn't even contact me to work something out, I guess once you report something like this their concerned about a lawsuit so i was probably out of a job as soon as i reported her.

Their worried about the company not the worker.

[chevellecobra]

Yes, the literally laughed at me, saying i took it the wrong way from her but they failed to see me being male that i couldn't of done this to her in only 9 weeks time being we were total strangers.

Maybe if i worked there for a longer period of time things would've been different but she just kept on doing this too many times too quick.

[jspice]

1 hour ago, chevellecobra said:

Yes, the literally laughed at me, saying i took it the wrong way from her but they failed to see me being male that i couldn't of done this to her in only 9 weeks time being we were total strangers.

Maybe if i worked there for a longer period of time things would've been different but she just kept on doing this too many times too quick.

Is this the reason you left? If so, you might have some legal recourse. 
do you have anything related to these incidents in writing? 
 

I can’t believe their reaction. 

[chevellecobra]

Her and them both is the reason, they don't care there's almost 100 % turnover rate of the hourly workers and i see why now.