CalipsoRose Posted September 27, 2021 Share Posted September 27, 2021 Yesterday I went to the hospital for a blood clot in my lungs. I posted this ordeal on social media to alert all my friends about it. They all saw my stories on instagram about this (you can see when someone looks at your story). However not a single one of them reached out to me asking if I was okay. Not one. I am confused and hurt by this. Granted, the majority of my friends on social media are childhood friends, or friends who I don't speak to on a daily basis, but still...I would think if an acquaintance or friend of mine was going through this, I'd reach out. It just made me think if something really dire happened to me, would they even care? ☹️ Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted September 27, 2021 Share Posted September 27, 2021 I'm sorry you're sick and felt alone. I think if I read that about a friend I wouldn't reach out too soon either because with a clot in the lungs it's painful to talk. So they probably didn't think you felt up to talking or reading texts. They also probably are thinking your family is with you and don't know you're alone. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted September 27, 2021 Share Posted September 27, 2021 9 minutes ago, CalipsoRose said: I posted this ordeal on social media to alert all my friends about it. They all saw my stories on instagram about this Sorry this happened. Talk to trusted friends and family directly about your medical issues. It's unwise to post anything like this publicly on social media. Hospital visits are not a test for popularity among acquaintances and social media "friends".. Only your real life close friends and family should know about this. Why did social media friends need to be "alerted" about this? Remove the post asap and reset all your social media so only trusted friends and family can view certain content or message you. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
ShyViolet Posted September 27, 2021 Share Posted September 27, 2021 If an acquaintance like a childhood friend, or someone I don't talk to regularly, posted something like this on social media, I wouldn't immediately reach out to them either, because I would feel like it's prying. An acquaintance or a person you don't talk to regularly is very different from a CLOSE friend. Do you have CLOSE friends, and did they reach out to you during this? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Alvi Posted September 27, 2021 Share Posted September 27, 2021 Sorry to hear about your ordeal CalipsoRose. Virtual hugs!!! Do you have a family or close friends (not the ones on the internet friends), the real ones that you can reach out to? 2 hours ago, CalipsoRose said: Granted, the majority of my friends on social media are childhood friends, or friends who I don't speak to on a daily basis, but still...I would think if an acquaintance or friend of mine was going through this, I'd reach out. It just made me think if something really dire happened to me, would they even care? They probably wouldn't. As sad as it sounds. In reality, people have their own lives and worries, they can't care much about what is going on with someone they hardly see or haven't see in a while. Link to post Share on other sites
glows Posted September 27, 2021 Share Posted September 27, 2021 (edited) I would call a friend instead of posting it online. Do you have anyone you can call to chat with or talk about what's going on? It's not realistic to expect people to respond to this kind of news online. The general consensus for use of social media is networking and keeping things lighthearted so you may be using it incorrectly. The plus side is that there may be other survivors and individuals who have similar health conditions or diagnosis as you and there may be a facebook group for example that you can search or join. I hope you feel better soon. Edited September 27, 2021 by glows 1 Link to post Share on other sites
clia Posted September 27, 2021 Share Posted September 27, 2021 (edited) Honestly, if someone was posting about something like that on social media, I would assume they are fine. I also don't understand why you need to "alert" all of these people (who you admit you don't even speak to regularly) about your situation. Quote Granted, the majority of my friends on social media are childhood friends, or friends who I don't speak to on a daily basis, but still...I would think if an acquaintance or friend of mine was going through this, I'd reach out. It just made me think if something really dire happened to me, would they even care? And I echo ShyViolet that I wouldn't reach out to someone who I didn't speak to regularly about something like this either. The tens or hundreds or thousands of people who you are "friends" with on social media are not really your true friends, and I don't really think it's realistic to think that they would be that affected if something happened to you. Edited September 27, 2021 by clia Link to post Share on other sites
Foxhall Posted September 28, 2021 Share Posted September 28, 2021 Yes there are certain things you have to keep your own counsel on, I sympathise with you on this- you are reaching out for support and need bit of a boost- but still Id prefer to keep my deepest personal stuff private or only with very close people, A person is lucky too if they have a loving partner and a few close friends or family, that they can share with the harsh reality is that general acquaintances, while they be sorry for your troubles to an extent, they are too busy with their own lives to really care. So I would say do not feel too annoyed about it- it is just the way of the world. wishing you a speedy recovery. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Blind-Sided Posted September 28, 2021 Share Posted September 28, 2021 I'm sorry you don't feel well, and I hope you are doing better. But, too many people see "SM Friends" as actual friends. I was recently talking with a neighbor, who was a collage friend, and she told me she was a little lonely, but didn't understand since she had "Hundreds of friends". Knowing she posts almost daily... and she likes to post sitting by a pool, and with a cocktail... I told her that her FB friends, ARE NOT real friends. She really didn't like to hear that... but she understood. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted September 28, 2021 Share Posted September 28, 2021 Get well soon. Although I understand your disappointment, I can't say I am surprised by "friends" non-reaction. Good friends are people who would know of your troubles in a more personal way & they would most likely have stepped up. Once it's on social media it sounds less serious. They also may not have your address, phone # or a way to contact you other than social media so they didn't bother. Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted September 28, 2021 Share Posted September 28, 2021 I agree that childhood friends and what sounds like acquaintances aren't the people who one would expect to step up...and I'm not sure why you felt they needed to now. It's those who are close to you who really matter. Pretend that you don't have FB. Who would you have called and what kind of help could they have offered. I hope you're feeling better soon xxx 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Alpacalia Posted September 28, 2021 Share Posted September 28, 2021 (edited) Sorry about that, OP. I hope you're feeling better now. Some (myself included) really only log into social media once every so often, and there are a lot of posts to look through, so perhaps they didn't see it at first? When things happen in your life and you're in frequent touch, these things tend to come up regardless, or if it's a friend group that knows and talks to each other in real life, it tends to trickle down and they'll reach out. So, give it some time. ♡ Edited September 28, 2021 by Alpaca 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Lotsgoingon Posted October 1, 2021 Share Posted October 1, 2021 I agree with others here: you shot yourself in the foot by posting this on social media. The implied message is, "I'm fine." Just this past week, a good friend of mine was heading back to her parents' place because her mother was dying. I called her. She called me back. I sent her specifiic texts. Had I learned about this from social media, I might just assume she already had the support she wanted and didn't need anything from me. Now, after her mother died, she sent a bunch of her close friends an email with the obituary writeup. She didn't have the energy to contact us one by one. So that makes sense. Next time pick two or three people to call. And no, don't text them or post a message to them. Call them. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
GeorgiaPeach1 Posted October 12, 2021 Share Posted October 12, 2021 On 9/27/2021 at 11:31 AM, CalipsoRose said: Yesterday I went to the hospital for a blood clot in my lungs. I posted this ordeal on social media to alert all my friends about it. They all saw my stories on instagram about this (you can see when someone looks at your story). However not a single one of them reached out to me asking if I was okay. Not one. I am confused and hurt by this. Granted, the majority of my friends on social media are childhood friends, or friends who I don't speak to on a daily basis, but still...I would think if an acquaintance or friend of mine was going through this, I'd reach out. It just made me think if something really dire happened to me, would they even care? ☹️ The word FRIEND is one of the most overused words on the planet. These are old acquaintances, at best. It sucks when you have to find out the hard way. I've been there. Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted October 12, 2021 Share Posted October 12, 2021 42 minutes ago, GeorgiaPeach1 said: The word FRIEND is one of the most overused words on the planet. Yes that and "best friends". Not every guy is your 'best friend' even if you are having sex with him. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted October 12, 2021 Share Posted October 12, 2021 A friend in need is a pest indeed... Some don't want to get involved in case they are required to actually do something to help... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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