LD affair looks like turning into a real relationship and I'm having a lot of anxiety

[Wiseman2]

4 minutes ago, ScientificThoughts said:

I do 50/50 with my kid and my ex. 

That's normal since you're legally divorce and live in the same area. 

However you can't just move to him and he certainly is not going to abandon his child to move to you, so it seems you may as well enjoy your visit but realize the logistics are quite difficult because of kids, home, jobs, family, etc.

[stillafool]

1 hour ago, ScientificThoughts said:

Not yet, he moves in Jan 1. He will be taking his kid there though every weekend. 

What about your kids are they going to?

[Birdies]

I think you will need to figure out the distance thing.  You both have kids you don't want to uproot or leave.  How are you going to have a real relationship when you live 12 hours apart?

My MM and I (both married during affair) are now very happily married with a family.  It can happen, particularly IF you address the reasons that you cheated (conflict avoidance, root selfishness, etc) and work on improving yourself.  But logistically, your situation seems difficult.  Someone would have to make hard decisions that will further upheave their children's lives, and like any parent should, hopefully you both will continue to put your kids first.