ReluctantRomeo Posted October 21, 2005 Share Posted October 21, 2005 Where has all of this insanity come from? There's an inexhaustible supply of it out there somewhere, honey Link to post Share on other sites
newbby Posted October 21, 2005 Share Posted October 21, 2005 Alpha is this just an opportunity to brag? I think as many people have already said, playing the game and getting people hooked on you is pretty easy for men and women alike, once you know the psychology behind falling in love. It really is after this stage that the most challenging part of the relationship comes into play. If you like a challenge this IS it. Make your challenge trying to keep a relationship running, trying to get some depth to it. Make the challenge for yourself, it is lazy to expect the other person to be the challenge for you. It is as demanding to expect somebody to keep you interested in them with games, as it is expecting somebody to reassure you with commitment, it goes both ways, and both can be equally boring for the other person. Link to post Share on other sites
lindya Posted October 21, 2005 Share Posted October 21, 2005 ...it is lazy to expect the other person to be the challenge for you. It is as demanding to expect somebody to keep you interested in them with games, as it is expecting somebody to reassure you with commitment, it goes both ways, and both can be equally boring for the other person. Such a good point. A partner isn't a courtesan or a court jester...or any other sycophant who devotes their life in the struggle to lengthen some spoiled brat's attention span. I remember my ex advising me (after a relationship that had lasted several years) that I'd need to get involved in a few new activities - threesomes being one, won't mention some of the others - if I wanted to keep him, as he was getting "bored". I almost didn't have the heart to tell him, as we were breaking up soon after this delightful revelation, that there were many times I had felt quite bored in his company. Love isn't 24/7 excitement, after all. Nothing is. Jesus - I'm supposed to be on holiday just now, and look what I'm doing Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted October 21, 2005 Share Posted October 21, 2005 Alpha is this just an opportunity to brag? No, it's not. He's being honest and wanted our thoughts. Trust me, you'll know when he's bragging! yes, like I said....i'm usually very aloof with women and almost all of them i dated have told me I did not see them enough, call them enough, give them enough attention, etc.... my philosophy is just to move on when i get bored. i really don't think i'm meant to be with only one female for the rest of my life and i've stated this up front to many women i dated, sometime on the 1st date. the funny thing is, WWIU, that many of the women stuck around and were still interested in me and I usually got rid of them... That is because they obviously thought it was well worth their time to be with you, even knowing that it could just end for no real reason except that it's time to move on. You must have that quality in you that attracts them and they'll learn something from you...Even if it means getting hurt. Either that, or you're really f**k'n good in bed and have a talented tongue! An ex of mine used to say " A relationship is like a flight of stairs...Everyday it's exciting, each day a new stair, brings on new things and fun...Until you reach the top, there's nowhere to go, but down." No s***, he actually said that to me. Link to post Share on other sites
loony Posted October 21, 2005 Share Posted October 21, 2005 An ex of mine used to say " A relationship is like a flight of stairs...Everyday it's exciting, each day a new stair, brings on new things and fun...Until you reach the top, there's nowhere to go, but down." No s***, he actually said that to me. And I thought the sky's the limit. Link to post Share on other sites
ReluctantRomeo Posted October 21, 2005 Share Posted October 21, 2005 And I thought the sky's the limit. Depends which staircase you decide to climb. To make it even more profound, sometimes you don't know how far it goes until you have turned a few corners. Enough deep wisdom Link to post Share on other sites
loony Posted October 21, 2005 Share Posted October 21, 2005 Depends which staircase you decide to climb. To make it even more profound, sometimes you don't know how far it goes until you have turned a few corners. Enough deep wisdom I don't need to turn corners to see the abyss in front of me... Link to post Share on other sites
ReluctantRomeo Posted October 21, 2005 Share Posted October 21, 2005 I don't need to turn corners to see the abyss in front of me... That's abyss-mal Link to post Share on other sites
Outcast Posted October 21, 2005 Share Posted October 21, 2005 That is because they obviously thought it was well worth their time to be with you, even knowing that it could just end for no real reason except that it's time to move on. You must have that quality in you that attracts them and they'll learn something from you...Even if it means getting hurt. Either that, or you're really f**k'n good in bed and have a talented tongue! Oh cripes WWIU? How many LS ladies are here posting because they get stuck in relationships with the Alphas of the world. Look at StarGazer's thread! Players charm the pants off women (literally) because they work hard at it. When the 'thrill is gone' is when the guys' real personalities come out - but by then the women are hooked. You've been married too long, girl. Link to post Share on other sites
Mary3 Posted October 21, 2005 Share Posted October 21, 2005 6,556 posts Alpha and in most of them you are either showing us how you * bang the ladies and run / or are telling us that most females have done various things to you ..( game playing , cheating , ect.. ) IN answer to your question : You need a quick exit out ( as we all do in relationships that are NOT working ) and so you keep your eye out for the red exit sign and go out accordingly when the time is right for you. Perhaps you should hang around a little longer . Give the girl a chance. Your general opinion of women is outdated and most of your post stress that we are just there to grab your wallet , get some sex and then we are gone. ( Or YOU are ....) Sad thing is ALOT of women are NOT like that but apparently you have never saw the * warning signs * and continue to persue women ( who hurt you ) and DUMP them as you stated : 80 % right ?? Well anyway , in answer to your question. : 3 months is the lovey dovey phase where everyone is being special , warm and nice and don't mind your *dirty hygiene sock routine* or much else. Once the 3 months has PASSED we start seeing the other person and DECIDE that " Hey this person is awesome or Holy Crap I cant stand when she/he does this _______ ( fill in the blank ) at THAT point 3 months is when the facade starts coming down and we DECIDE if that person is WHO we really want to spend time with. So you went on 743 dates and decided at the 3 month mark that these chicks were NOT right for you.?? Thats fine. But I would start opening your eyes and listen to the posters here ( female ) What are we trying to TELL you ? What do we have to offer ? Can females be anything but gold digging, back stabbing ,evil do-ers of the Earth ? Is it POSSIBLE that good girls ( Okay bad girls in bed , good girls around your mom ) exist ?? Try some more flavors of icecream. In that you might find a flavor you can STICK to Link to post Share on other sites
noclobber Posted October 21, 2005 Share Posted October 21, 2005 Well anyway , in answer to your question. : 3 months is the lovey dovey phase where everyone is being special , warm and nice and don't mind your *dirty hygiene sock routine* or much else. Once the 3 months has PASSED we start seeing the other person and DECIDE that " Hey this person is awesome or Holy Crap I cant stand when she/he does this _______ ( fill in the blank ) at THAT point 3 months is when the facade starts coming down and we DECIDE if that person is WHO we really want to spend time with. Mary3, I think u r right about the 3-month progression in relationships. I guess people generally decide during the 3rd month whether they r really into the other person. Then if everything goes well the actual relationship starts and brings along with it its own baggage of problems. Then of course marriage is the end!! End to all ur happiness Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted October 21, 2005 Share Posted October 21, 2005 You've been married too long, girl. Boy am I ever glad I am! I see your point. Everybody goes through those kinds of relationships at some point, the ones where you put up with s***, get treated abit badly, can't let go of the guy because either of insecurities, or allowing the heart to rule over the head...Either way it's a learning curve, to find out what you will/won't put up with in the next relationship. And I thought the sky's the limit. LOL well, it wasn't with this guy. I thought so, but obviously he didn't. Link to post Share on other sites
fsfd Posted October 21, 2005 Share Posted October 21, 2005 You have some subconscious issues that are unresolved. It is likely that you were abused as a child in one way or another. Does anyone else have this problem?? I'll start dating someone new and I'll be real into them for 3 or 4 months and then my interest level will just hit rock-bottom and I don't care about them anymore..... This has happened to me with many different women. Its like they can't hold my interest for more than 16 weeks. There have been 3 or 4 women I dated that were able to keep my interest level high for quite a long time, as in years, but even with them I eventually lost interest (or they did).... My dating pattern has been that i'll meet someone new and she'll be all into me and I like her but after 3 or 4 months i just lose interest and dump her or stop calling her out-of-the-blue. Now, conversely, a few women have done the same to me (lose interest in me after a few months) but 80% of the time it is me losing interest in her. I don't know what the deal is, its weird. What do you think it is? Fear of falling in love, fear of commitment, wanting to sleep with many women? Hmmmm.... Link to post Share on other sites
Mary3 Posted October 21, 2005 Share Posted October 21, 2005 Marraige is the end ? You mean like the *final phase* or more like a death sentence ? Link to post Share on other sites
SmoochieFace Posted October 21, 2005 Share Posted October 21, 2005 Marraige is the end ? You mean like the *final phase* or more like a death sentence ? To Alpha it would be. Link to post Share on other sites
noclobber Posted October 21, 2005 Share Posted October 21, 2005 Marraige is the end ? You mean like the *final phase* or more like a death sentence ? Like a break.... before u move on to another person and start the cycle again.. till u end in.. of course, Marriage Link to post Share on other sites
Author alphamale Posted October 22, 2005 Author Share Posted October 22, 2005 IN answer to your question : You need a quick exit out ( as we all do in relationships that are NOT working ) and so you keep your eye out for the red exit sign and go out accordingly when the time is right for you. Perhaps you should hang around a little longer . Give the girl a chance. This is good in theory, MARY3....but in practice the longer I hang out with her the more "attached" she gets and the harder it is to break it off. Do you underestand my reasoning?? Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted October 22, 2005 Share Posted October 22, 2005 This is good in theory, MARY3....but in practice the longer I hang out with her the more "attached" she gets and the harder it is to break it off. Do you underestand my reasoning?? That makes perfect sense. Why would someone stay knowing and feeling it's over, yet keep the other person around, allow them to fall in deeper. That's insane and cruel. Link to post Share on other sites
Mary3 Posted October 23, 2005 Share Posted October 23, 2005 What is so wrong with you both becoming attached ? Are you the chronic bachelor ? lol Link to post Share on other sites
Author alphamale Posted October 23, 2005 Author Share Posted October 23, 2005 Are you the chronic bachelor ? lol pretty much, yes... Link to post Share on other sites
Lishy Posted October 24, 2005 Share Posted October 24, 2005 sure LRB...some of them do get "bored" with me....but most of the time, 80% i'd say, it is me who splits. I guess I'm just to frightened to get too emotionally close to a female. The few times I did it ended in disaster. There is your answer Alpha - You got burned and you wont allow that to happen again! You put on a brave 'Alpha Male' front - But I think deep down you crave that long lasting love. I think that when you reply to posts you give a great inside knowledge of the asses we are posting about lol But deep down you are just like us all - Vunerable and wanting to find that special person! Just admit it big guy!!!!!! Link to post Share on other sites
NatoPMT Posted October 24, 2005 Share Posted October 24, 2005 The few that were able to "wrap me around their fingers" eventually left after they had me lock, stock and barrel.... The only women you have wanted to stay with then react to you the way you have reacted to women you have dumped. You are looking in a mirror when dating – choosing women with the same problems you have. You want a female ‘you’ – that’s fine if you are a worthy companion, but by your own admission, you aren’t. You think that the only women worth staying with play games – the push pull power manipulation you spoke of, That’s not a relationship, it’s a game of cat and mouse to see who will push or pull the hardest until something snaps. I just get bored with them or they don't live up to my stds once i get to know them better. Don’t have relationships with people before you know them. Get to know a woman, if she still excites you without the s/ex, then you know you have a better chance of success I guess I'm just to frightened to get too emotionally close to a female My advice is to stop your behaviour if its not keeping you happy. Have a dating break, get to know women without seeing them through lust-crazed dilated pupils. If your pupils are still dilated after being overawed by her headlights has worn off, THEN go for it. If you are scared of being hurt, remember, no-one ever lies on their deathbed being thankful they never loved nor were ever hurt. And if you know her properly without viewing her a se/x toy before getting close, your chances of choosing a the wrong person decrease. Get out of your comfort zone, as your comfort zone is getting uncomfortable BB Link to post Share on other sites
Author alphamale Posted October 24, 2005 Author Share Posted October 24, 2005 Alpha is this just an opportunity to brag? No I think as many people have already said, playing the game and getting people hooked on you is pretty easy for men and women alike, once you know the psychology behind falling in love. Few men are concious of that "psychology" but more women are aware of it. What I was trying to point out was that its easy for me to have women fall in love with me but its hard for me to fall in love with them. I've been in "love" with maybe three women in my whole life... It really is after this stage that the most challenging part of the relationship comes into play. If you like a challenge this IS it. Make your challenge trying to keep a relationship running, trying to get some depth to it. I agree NEWBBY...but very few women are intriguing enough for me to even get to this stage. Oh cripes WWIU? How many LS ladies are here posting because they get stuck in relationships with the Alphas of the world. Look at StarGazer's thread! Players charm the pants off women (literally) because they work hard at it. When the 'thrill is gone' is when the guys' real personalities come out - but by then the women are hooked. I think that many men want variety. And the men who can get variety tend to abuse it. If a man is attractive and smart and with a good job he will have more women interested in him and its easier for him to take advantage of that... personally, i know that there will always be another woman around the corner. I may have to wait for 3 or 4 months but eventually another woman becomes interested. I've really never had a shortage of women who were interested in me. Not bragging, but that is the reality. But deep down you are just like us all - Vunerable and wanting to find that special person! Of course I am....we all want to find "the one" that will make us lose all interest in any other potential partners. But this is like trying to find the proverbial needle in the haystack Link to post Share on other sites
Outcast Posted October 24, 2005 Share Posted October 24, 2005 I've really never had a shortage of women who were interested in me. You don't get it. It's not about people interested in you. There are always plenty of people interested in me, too. The difference between us is that I will not enter into a relationship with someone unless that person meets my requirements for a long-term partner. I will not play with people's emotions and I will not try to fool myself that it's possible to 'just have sex' with someone thinking their feelings might not get involved. I don't think it's any big deal to have had numerous lovers because it's not that hard to find people who want to sleep with you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author alphamale Posted October 24, 2005 Author Share Posted October 24, 2005 You don't get it. It's not about people interested in you. There are always plenty of people interested in me, too. The difference between us is that I will not enter into a relationship with someone unless that person meets my requirements for a long-term partner. So you must have a crystal ball OUTCAST.....how do you know up front that someone has the requirements for a long-term relationship unless you've spend a few months with them. I mean, anyone can look good on paper or after 2 or 3 dates. How would you know on date # 4 that this is a good long term potential???? I sure as hell don't. I takes me at least 3 or 4 months (sometimes longer) to get to know someone fairly well and to even ascertain if I want to be with long term.... Link to post Share on other sites
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