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I’m sorry you are hurting. It sounds like you made the right call given the timeline and the mismatch in what you want vs what he was willing or able to give. 

It wasn’t a waste of time. These experiences can be invaluable in seeing future relationships more clearly good or bad. When you find someone where feelings are near equal and your goals align, it’s like magic and you will know. 

What was his reaction to the breakup? I know you want that text or phone call that says he has come to his senses, but if that were to happen, you need to guard yourself and proceed carefully to make sure it is genuine or you will wind up in the same place down the road. 

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58 minutes ago, QueenBanrigh said:

Hey, I'm there with you. I was doing the dishes while crying, showering while crying lol it's okay. It hurts like hell now but you will look back on this eventually and not feel that pain anymore that seemed like it would last forever.

It’s the worst feeling

I struggle getting out of bed in the morning and the thought of facing another day makes me feel sick to my stomach

How are you doing now?

 

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46 minutes ago, DividedTrail said:

I’m sorry you are hurting. It sounds like you made the right call given the timeline and the mismatch in what you want vs what he was willing or able to give. 

It wasn’t a waste of time. These experiences can be invaluable in seeing future relationships more clearly good or bad. When you find someone where feelings are near equal and your goals align, it’s like magic and you will know. 

What was his reaction to the breakup? I know you want that text or phone call that says he has come to his senses, but if that were to happen, you need to guard yourself and proceed carefully to make sure it is genuine or you will wind up in the same place down the road. 

I don’t even think he saw it as a break up as I was never his girlfriend 

I asked him if he felt stuck with me and didn’t know how to end things but he said no as he felt content with where we were, but when I asked what was holding him back from committing fully to a relationship he said he just didn’t know and he couldn’t give me an answer. So frustrating it almost would have been easier if he just said I don’t like you enough!

I know I won’t hear from him again as he clearly only saw it as a casual thing, I kept telling myself things weren’t right but ignored those thoughts as I like him so much, I’ve genuinely never met someone I felt so comfortable with and who made me smile so much, so I miss that a lot 

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I think he liked you for the time being but not for a long term kind of relationship, you did the right thing ending it!

sorry for your sadness, you'll get over it, block him everywhere so you can move on faster.

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26 minutes ago, Noproblem said:

I think he liked you for the time being but not for a long term kind of relationship, you did the right thing ending it!

sorry for your sadness, you'll get over it, block him everywhere so you can move on faster.

Yeah I think you’re right, I know he did like me and it sounds a bit childish but I kinda hope he regrets this decision in the future as I know we would have been good together

Ive deleted him off social media so I can’t see what he’s up to and I’m working my way up towards deleting his number 

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14 minutes ago, MissT92 said:

Yeah I think you’re right, I know he did like me and it sounds a bit childish but I kinda hope he regrets this decision in the future as I know we would have been good together

Ive deleted him off social media so I can’t see what he’s up to and I’m working my way up towards deleting his number 

he might regret it one day, but by then he would mean nothing to you, just a distant memory!

Delete the photos too or hide them!

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9 minutes ago, Noproblem said:

he might regret it one day, but by then he would mean nothing to you, just a distant memory!

Delete the photos too or hide them!

They were all deleted the day I called things off, I couldn’t bear having them on my phone 

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44 minutes ago, MissT92 said:

They were all deleted the day I called things off, I couldn’t bear having them on my phone 

I just want to let you know, it will pass and it will get better

Try to occupy yourself with other stuff, read a book, watch a tv show (non-romantic one), go out with friends or family..

Anything..

 

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On 11/6/2021 at 12:55 PM, MissT92 said:

 

I found out he was messaging another girl (not his ex) and that made me question things too as I thought maybe he didn’t want to call me his girlfriend because he wanted to keep his options open

 

Bingo!

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12 hours ago, MissT92 said:

It’s the worst feeling

I struggle getting out of bed in the morning and the thought of facing another day makes me feel sick to my stomach

How are you doing now?

 

I'm okay. Unfortunately I live with my ex so I have to face him everyday when I get home. Night time is the worst, I'm sleeping in the guest bedroom until I can get my things together to move out. 

Try to make little daily goals for yourself. Simple things like getting out of bed and making your bed or eating, watching a movie etc. We have to take baby steps

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1 hour ago, QueenBanrigh said:

I'm okay. Unfortunately I live with my ex so I have to face him everyday when I get home. Night time is the worst, I'm sleeping in the guest bedroom until I can get my things together to move out. 

Try to make little daily goals for yourself. Simple things like getting out of bed and making your bed or eating, watching a movie etc. We have to take baby steps

That must be really difficult, are you speaking much in the evenings or trying to stay out of each other’s way? 
Im back in work now Monday to Friday so that’s something to focus on and I’m going to get back to the gym tomorrow which always helps me 

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7 hours ago, MissT92 said:

That must be really difficult, are you speaking much in the evenings or trying to stay out of each other’s way? 
Im back in work now Monday to Friday so that’s something to focus on and I’m going to get back to the gym tomorrow which always helps me 

I stay out of his way mostly all day, though he still texts me to "check up" on me. It's odd. The other day I got home after midnight because I was busy helping my Aunt paint her livingroom and kitchen, as well as helping her build her new furniture. When I got home, he came into the kitchen when I was cooking myself food before bed and he started to quiz me asking where I was and who I was with. 

I'm not reading into any of this though. He made his decision and I am still focusing on myself. The gym will definitely help you in terms of sleeping, and eventually you'll start to feel better about all of this.

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3 hours ago, QueenBanrigh said:

I stay out of his way mostly all day, though he still texts me to "check up" on me. It's odd. The other day I got home after midnight because I was busy helping my Aunt paint her livingroom and kitchen, as well as helping her build her new furniture. When I got home, he came into the kitchen when I was cooking myself food before bed and he started to quiz me asking where I was and who I was with. 

I'm not reading into any of this though. He made his decision and I am still focusing on myself. The gym will definitely help you in terms of sleeping, and eventually you'll start to feel better about all of this.

It does sound like he is checking up on you and it’s not his right to do that if he decided to end things, that’s just playing mind games with you. What was his reasoning for the break up by the way? 

Stay strong and definitely focus on yourself, you got this :) 

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5 hours ago, MissT92 said:

It does sound like he is checking up on you and it’s not his right to do that if he decided to end things, that’s just playing mind games with you. What was his reasoning for the break up by the way? 

Stay strong and definitely focus on yourself, you got this :) 

Honestly, he didn't really give me a reason. He just randomly told me that he wasn't sure about us and he thinks we should just be friends - after I was supporting him for weeks with his depression. I had bought him a PS5 to cheer him up bc he always wanted one and then two weeks later that's what he told me.. so I've been in a state of confusion since then

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