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I am struggling with my girlfriend


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I am with current GF, but recently met up with this girl, well yesterday actually.

It like we are a match in respect to how we are and how calm we are. I don't know she very nice, I don't have that physical chemistry with my GF yet so attach and don't want to end things and let her down, she deservers better from me 

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1 minute ago, GOLDIEJUST27 said:

I am with current GF, but recently met up with this girl, well yesterday actually. It like we are a match in respect to how we are and how calm we are. I don't know she very nice, I don't have that physical chemistry with my GF 

So you are cheating...or hoping to?

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It sounds like you are afraid of separation from your girlfriend but actually don't want to be with her.  

There is no way I can condone her being violent.  I don't know what the angry exchanges were about but if you are staying with her for security but actually don't want to spend time with her, that sounds like a very tense and unpleasant kind of relationship.

You don't want her but you would feel anxious without her.  You feeling anxious is not the same as you loving her.  It sounds more like you just want her to be around in the background while you play away and do what you like.  She is not your mother, she is your girlfriend.

I really think the only way forward for you two is relationship counselling.  It is clear you are not happy together and you are sunk in depression.  I would wager your girlfriend is feeling pretty depressed too.

What you need to find out is if there is any chance of improving this relationship and saving it.  At least you will have some certainty over which direction you need to go in.

Honestly, I think you will cling to the girlfriend you appear to dislike until she kicks you out.  She is feeling hurt about your disengaged behaviour.  This has led to a very tense, unhappy situation.  Something will give.  It is better that you come to terms with being separated from her and acknowledge that you are not making each other happy, than to keep on in this situation until the relationship ends in anger.

Edited by spiderowl
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16 hours ago, GOLDIEJUST27 said:

Not exactly, well lets say I am conflicted.

Ok. Move out of the GFs house. Stop using her as a security blanket and free yourself.

This woman or any others you're hoping to cheat with are just going to run when they learn the truth.

Examine your motives for staying. Reflect on what you want for yourself.

Don't rehearse the "my partner doesn't understand me, I'm a victim, etc" thing on new women.  Just end it if you are unhappy.

 

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