Boyfriend acts like my feelings don't matter

[Rusland0006]

Just looking for a bit of support. 
 

I told my boyfriend of 2 years that I was feeling a bit low today. No particular reason, just felt like things were getting on top of me a bit. I hadn’t seen my boyfriend all day and I made sure to give him some space after work so he could chill. I put my daughter to bed and was excited to come through and see him, to which he threw down his headphones and said that he never gets any peace. He is either working or he is with me. I said to him that he could listen to music if he wanted to, I don’t mind. I also told him that the comment hurt me, especially considering I felt a bit low, that he made me feel like I was inconveniencing him by coming in to spend time with him. 
 

I ended up getting upset because he said I made everything about me and that I was giving him stress on top of his work stress. I said I just needed him and he left me crying and went into the other room. He never even came to see if I was okay. I’ve told him before that I have massive issues with abandonment and feeling rejected (growing up) and invalidated but for some reason this is exactly how it made me feel. I almost feel like my feelings don’t matter if they cause any inconvenience.  Am I being overly sensitive? Or am I right that someone who loves you, who says they want to marry you,  “worships” you, would not leave you crying with no comfort? 

Edited November 18, 2021 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
give meaningful title

[Wiseman2]

13 minutes ago, Rusland0006 said:

I told my boyfriend of 2 years that I was feeling a bit low today. I hadn’t seen my boyfriend all day and I made sure to give him some space after work so he could chill. I put my daughter to bed and was excited to come through and see him, to which he threw down his headphones and said that he never gets any peace. He is either working or he is with me.

Sorry to hear tis. Do you live together? Whose place is it? Yours, his or do you co-own/co=lease? 

Is it his child? How old is she?  If not, how is your co-parenting relationship?

What were you "down" about?

He seems rather nasty and dismissive. Does he help out around the house?

 See a physician about your mental and physical health. Ask for a referral to a therapist for ongoing support.

 Discuss how nasty and dismissive this BF is. While a Bf is not responsible for your "abandonment issues", there's no reason to snap and make you feel worse. Discuss whether having someone like him around is good for your child and parenting.

Edited November 17, 2021 by Wiseman2

[glows]

2 hours ago, Rusland0006 said:

Just looking for a bit of support. 
 

I told my boyfriend of 2 years that I was feeling a bit low today. No particular reason, just felt like things were getting on top of me a bit. I hadn’t seen my boyfriend all day and I made sure to give him some space after work so he could chill. I put my daughter to bed and was excited to come through and see him, to which he threw down his headphones and said that he never gets any peace. He is either working or he is with me. I said to him that he could listen to music if he wanted to, I don’t mind. I also told him that the comment hurt me, especially considering I felt a bit low, that he made me feel like I was inconveniencing him by coming in to spend time with him. 
 

I ended up getting upset because he said I made everything about me and that I was giving him stress on top of his work stress. I said I just needed him and he left me crying and went into the other room. He never even came to see if I was okay. I’ve told him before that I have massive issues with abandonment and feeling rejected (growing up) and invalidated but for some reason this is exactly how it made me feel. I almost feel like my feelings don’t matter if they cause any inconvenience.  Am I being overly sensitive? Or am I right that someone who loves you, who says they want to marry you,  “worships” you, would not leave you crying with no comfort? 

What's causing your low moods? It sounds from your post that you are more or less venting instead of wanting any advice in particular.

I don't think that you are being overly sensitive. His reaction was over the top and quite rude. He could have greeted you lovingly and mentioned he was finishing up in a few minutes. Is he always this resentful towards you?

[Foxhall]

Yes he will probably regret his reaction later and make it up to you,

you caught him at a bad time perhaps.

yes ,patience, tolerance, coping with stresses all things a person needs to become better at.