TURP surgery scheduled for 8th December and I'm scared.

[Wade Lamare]

Hi all, sorry to sound like a bit of a sissy but I am genuinely scared.

I have a (fairly recent) history of problems for which my surgeon has suggested I undergo a transurethral resection of the prostate. Symptoms are, several UTIs two of which developed into blood sepsis, extreme urinary urgency and nocturia. I don't get the 'normal' symptoms of restricted flow etc.

I did reduce some of the symptoms by losing a little weight and exercising but they never went away, just reduced, but are now returning. I haven't had a UTI for a year or so.

My surgeon did suggest that maybe I could delay the operation if I wanted but he did say that he recommended I go ahead as my UTIs could return and he feels the other symptoms would only get worse.

One of the reasons I was so knocked off my stride was that I only saw him recently for the most recent consultation (I've had numerous tests, scans and tablets to take) I agreed to the procedure expecting him to say something like, "Hmmm, lets see, I can fit you in next March or May sometime". Instead he said, "we can fit you in on 8th of December." That was just over two weeks from my consult, so instead of several months to get over the idea I've got two weeks!

I have watched (usually only about 20 seconds worth before going 🤯) YouTube videos of the procedure and they seriously make me freak out and cringe, my wife has 'banned' me from watching any more as they really affect me 😀.

Don't get me wrong, I am one of these people who normally don't worry about operations, medical procedures etc, I have an almost childlike faith in science and medicine. But where this is, how they access it and the potential side effects are really doing a number on me.

The main side effect that is concerning me is that of retrograde ejaculation. I'm worried that my wife will see me as less of a man if I get this to any extent. The surgeon has suggested that I assume I will get it so that I will be pleasantly surprised if I don't. My wife has told me that my worries are nonsense and has pointed out the benefits of no mess. However although, after making love, she does the "eeew it's leaking everywhere" thing I think she is secretly pleased that I can still 'fill her up'.

I intend trying to deflect some of my anxiety on the day by sneaking a bow tie into hospital and putting it on my pride and joy before I get wheeled in to the operating theatre.

Not 100% sure why I've posted, but would welcome any advice and even a few 'good lucks'.

Finally, the blurb you get in the information package says, "please ensure you get a good nights sleep and rest the night prior to the operation". They are fricking kidding, right? I doubt I'll sleep at all tbh.

[Foxhall]

Hmmn rather you than me buddy,

Id prefer to treat it as best I could with herbal remedies if it were me,

At least from what I read there is not a huge amount of serious openings involved in the procedure, the procedure itself should not take them that long,

no easy way to say it- your going to be in discomfort for a couple of weeks anyway, but have to think positive I suppose and you will feel better for it in the long run,

well at least your going to get it over and done with and will be likely be coming back to yourself by the new year,

scary though - your health is everything really,

not reassuring you much am I- but anyway these surgeons know what they are doing,

good luck.

 

 

[Happy Lemming]

Blood Sepsis sounds scarier than this procedure.

 

[Wiseman2]

Get a second opinion. Always a good idea before surgery. Research "HoLEP"

[Wade Lamare]

21 hours ago, Happy Lemming said:

Blood Sepsis sounds scarier than this procedure.

 

Yeah, it was awful. And I did the typical 'bloke' thing by dealing with it by myself. I had a full on fever, shivering one moment, sweating the next, deathly cold the next. My wee was dark brown. It set off my worst ever attack of cold sores, my mouth was covered in them, I lost over 14 lb in weight. I spent the whole time in bed, everything tasted foul.

When I eventually saw the doctor to get a sick note for work he tore me off a strip. He told me that untreated sepsis can cause a number of issues including death due to toxic shock. He made me promise that if ever I got to the point where I felt I had no control over my temperature I would take myself to A&E pronto.

[Wade Lamare]

21 hours ago, Foxhall said:

Hmmn rather you than me buddy,

Id prefer to treat it as best I could with herbal remedies if it were me,

At least from what I read there is not a huge amount of serious openings involved in the procedure, the procedure itself should not take them that long,

no easy way to say it- your going to be in discomfort for a couple of weeks anyway, but have to think positive I suppose and you will feel better for it in the long run,

well at least your going to get it over and done with and will be likely be coming back to yourself by the new year,

scary though - your health is everything really,

not reassuring you much am I- but anyway these surgeons know what they are doing,

good luck.

 

 

Thanks, not looking forward to it to be honest, I'm hoping it gets cancelled due to covid really.

One thing I find mildly amusing is the pamphlet you get as part of your preparation pack. As I mentioned it advises you to get a good nights sleep the night before your op. However it basically describes that they are going to ram this pipe down your winky, burn out part of what makes you a man and that afterwards you will be so swollen and sore down there that you have to wee through a catheter.

Then it tells you to get a good nights sleep the night before so you arrive relaxed.

Not. Frickin'. Happening. I am going to be a sleep deprived bag of nerves!

[ShyViolet]

On 11/26/2021 at 3:58 AM, Wade Lamare said:

Yeah, it was awful. And I did the typical 'bloke' thing by dealing with it by myself. I had a full on fever, shivering one moment, sweating the next, deathly cold the next. My wee was dark brown. It set off my worst ever attack of cold sores, my mouth was covered in them, I lost over 14 lb in weight. I spent the whole time in bed, everything tasted foul.

What on earth?  I think getting this surgery is much better than risking THIS happening again.

And why are you watching Youtube videos of the procedure???  Stop doing that!  That will only drive you crazy and scare you, but you're not a medical professional so there's no reason for you to be seeing graphic video of the procedure.

[Wade Lamare]

On 11/28/2021 at 10:04 PM, ShyViolet said:

What on earth?  I think getting this surgery is much better than risking THIS happening again.

And why are you watching Youtube videos of the procedure???  Stop doing that!  That will only drive you crazy and scare you, but you're not a medical professional so there's no reason for you to be seeing graphic video of the procedure.

Well I suppose it was just curiosity. And yes, I know what they say about curiosity! ☹️.

I know what you're saying makes sense and that you are absolutely right in what you say but logic doesn't always trump irrational fear. As I mentioned I'm usually very blasé about medical procedures and I have great faith in science and medicine but it's where it is that is freaking me out.

Mrs Lamare didn't get it at first until I pointed out that some years back the option of her having a hysterectomy was mooted due to a medical problem she was having. She was worried about it and dead set against losing (to her mind) that which makes her a woman. Understanding how she felt about that led to her understanding how I feel about potentially losing that which makes me a man.

[Taramere]

I wish you all the best for your surgery, Wade.   I'm assuming you'll have to fast for several hours before the surgery?  In the time before that fast starts, it's important to eat healthy - avoid any sort of junk food.  Yin yoga is very good for relaxation and getting your best chance at a good night's sleep.  I'm sure it will all go very well for you.

[Foxhall]

Likewise, best wishes for tomorrow.