New job and prejudiced boss. What to do?

[babybrowns]

Hello all,

I recently moved across the country for a promotion. The top boss of this place, was very excited for me to start here because the place was in need of significant change and she felt I am the person that was needed. I came here with lots of energy and will to implement improvements.

Things are going generally well- when I’ve been allowed to do my job. However my immediate boss (not the top boss), suffers from prejudice. When I asked him about this, he tried to frame this as he “might be prejudiced against new staff” but I think it’s more than that.

I have a protected characteristic which not many people in this part of the country have, and I think that has a lot to do with the differential way in which he treats me.

In addition to this, The turnover rate at this place is very low, meaning that if you are a new member of staff, you absolutely feel it.

There have been a couple of occasions where I have been verbally abused by 2 people at this new job on separate occasions. Both times, they approached and attacked me, and were very rude. One of them had wanted the job I got (she applied as an internal candidate and got rejected for me coming in as a new person) and made sure to let me feel it. 

When I relayed these incidents to my boss, rather than help me resolve matters, he immediately turned on me and assumed I was at fault. He did *no* digging whatsoever into what happened.

Instead, he stripped me of some of my leadership responsibilities, and put my ‘faults’ as targets on my appraisal. All of this was extremely unfair and misrepresentative of me. 

Never in my employment history has this happened to me. My former employers would laugh at these ‘targets’ my boss gave me. Worse, the big boss of the place never has the opportunity to see or work with me and only knows about me through this prejudiced immediate boss of mine.

I really wanted to prove my boss wrong. Recently, he got very sick with a bug and was at home all week. In his absence, I acted on some of my senior responsibilities that he had stripped me of, and the results were awesome. Colleagues would then come to me for help, they would want me to mentor them. I did take a risk in doing what my boss had said I should not do, but I wanted him to see the benefits of it: what happens when he does not clip my wings like he had.

When my boss came back, he did see the changes, recognised them, but refused to change anything in terms of my restrictions. He kept me stripped of responsibilities and kept those written targets on my appraisal. He has been super nice to me since then though to ‘make up’ for it.

Needless to say, this is very demoralising. I wrote to the big boss of the place, who unfortunately did nothing. So I am thinking that my only option is to leave.

In the mean time though, would anyone have any tips or suggestions? I would really appreciate it 🙂

Edited November 26, 2021 by babybrowns

[glows]

Writing emails and letters can backfire so don't keep looking for issues to make a point or fight about. The people around you have been there at the company longer and are those you report to. A little respect for seniority and your coworkers will also earn you respect over time. Expecting that respect is entitled. Don't do that. Bosses don't want to keep referee-ing petty squabbles in the work place. If you have any documented issues of specific comments that are derogatory, inflammatory or target your "protected characteristic" or disability or minority status, then share it with HR.

Arguments not of this nature are usually considered petty and employees are expected to get along with one another and work as a team. Without knowing the ins/outs I think your immediate boss got irritated with you to start and felt that you were too focused on other issues or needing to be right about things. He may have felt you didn't or couldn't handle the extra responsibility because of lack of focus. I'm surprised he didn't fire you for doing things that you were no longer authorized to do. 

If you feel this place is so discriminatory, leave. Don't burn any bridges but reconsider working there anymore.  

[spiderowl]

Yes, best to leave if this is the way they treat you from the start.

As in many places, it does take time to be accepted and to be understood.  If you are in a position of authority over others, there will be resentment that they didn't get that job.  They may also resent that you are making changes.

I would say look for another job.  In the meantime, try to be supportive and understanding of those subordinate to you.  These are the people who will initially feel the effects of anything you do.  If you can get a team around you, supporting you as well, you will have achieved something in the job.

It is not right that people complain to you that you got the job they were hoping for.  What you can do, is to understand their anger and be pleasant and exercise patience until they come to terms with it.  Seeing where people's feelings come from, understanding, and then working out how best to turn them into something positive, may help.

Depending on what the boss took you on to do, other staff are either going to approve or not.  You could try all ways to get them on your side - and this is what some do - but the simplest thing would be to do your job as instructed (unless you would be sabotaging your own reputation in the process) and aim to at least avoid a negative reference.

Sometimes an environment is not conducive to making positive changes.  Sometimes it is, but it takes time.  Just be aware that those above you as well as those below you can feel threatened.  Getting them on board with you and making friends rather than enemies can only be beneficial.  Just be fair to all and consistent so that people know you have integrity and can be trusted.  Also, it goes without saying, but keep confidences for all who speak to you in confidence.  You may find that gradually you gain the trust of the people in the company and things go much better for you.

 

Edited November 27, 2021 by spiderowl