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MM tells me he has feelings for me


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13 hours ago, lovebuzz said:

I am the first time he has strayed in six years.

There are no other women around here for him other than his wife and me in his controlled environment.  He has said it was "very painful".  The "other things going on" for him is that his wife is watching him like a hawk and his interactions are monitored.

Is there really nobody else you can date? As was said above, I would not set my standards so low…

Why involve yourself in this kind of drama? Personally, I would stay single for the rest of my life and live very happily before I would involve myself in a situation like this.

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On 12/6/2021 at 10:27 PM, lovebuzz said:

It's not that I think I deserve a serial cheater.  I was his confidante, tennis partner and friend.

Just disregard all the red flags and character flaws because he is a good friend and tennis partner. What kind of decision making is that? And, if that’s true - be his friend. Have a weekly game of tennis together in public and then let him go home to his wife. You can enjoy his company without having sex and breaking up his marriage - can you not?

Edited by BaileyB
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On 12/6/2021 at 10:27 PM, lovebuzz said:

I think mostly the people on this site think I am no good and their opinion is swayed because of it.

I think you are making a poor decision and throwing out a bunch of rather silly justifications for your behavior… your posts remind me of a petulant teenager - I’m going to do what I want to do and nobody can stop me! I had tuned out of this thread because there is nothing anyone can say that will sway you… And honestly, it’s disheartening to watch an otherwise intelligent and mature woman sacrifice her self respect by involving herself in such a relationship…

Edited by BaileyB
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14 hours ago, lovebuzz said:

 There are no other women around here for him... it's not like he goes out without his wife.

Does he live in the middle of Arizona desert with miles between him and civilization? If not, rest assured he will find a way. These men don't care much how you look, they care only about the chase and scoring. Doesn't matter you look half your age and he thought you were oh-so-hot, that was part of his game. he will hump about anything in site, sexy or not. 

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2 hours ago, elaine567 said:

Since his "final email" has he been in touch?

This seems to me to be the rub. OP, you are waiting on communication that may or may not ever arrive.

The good news is you seem content on your own, so no harm done in that sense.

I don't sense much drama in that actually, in and of itself. OP posted here, but it seems like without extended commentary from external parties, things would essentially be humdrum, with perhaps a bit of unrequited longing thrown in.

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On 12/6/2021 at 3:12 AM, lovebuzz said:

 

However from speaking to him prior,  he told me he agreed to see a therapist just to keep the peace in his home... so I believe he just agreed to send the email but did not necessarily mean all of its content.  He had also told me he was not allowed to enter my house, and then after a while, he did.

 

 

This is almost funny, but it's also one of the most pathetic things I've read in a long, long time. So what you're saying is this guy, who clearly knows he has a problem (sex addiction) and that it's hurting his wife and potentially putting his kids at risk. He has a chance to get some therapy to improve himself an make him less of a jackass ,  and he would rather fake his way through it, and comment on this to a women he wants to sleep with on the side as if it's something to proud of?

Add to that he seems to feel it's a good joke that he's going behind her back? Good god, what is, he? three years old? "My big mean mommy told me I can't go out to play, but guess what? I ran away" ?.

That's ridiculous.

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2 hours ago, Gaeta said:

Does he live in the middle of Arizona desert with miles between him and civilization? If not, rest assured he will find a way. These men don't care much how you look, they care only about the chase and scoring. Doesn't matter you look half your age and he thought you were oh-so-hot, that was part of his game. he will hump about anything in site, sexy or not. 

if he is a sex addict, it's not about sex. it's no different than a gambler placing one more bet even though he knows he's going to lose his house or an alcoholic picking up the bottle even though they know it means they'll lose their kids. This may just be me, but I wouldn't feel good handing him the bottle or dealing the cards, especially if had had any sort of feelings for him. why would I help him destroy himself like that?

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18 hours ago, lovebuzz said:

There are no other women around here for him other than his wife and me in his controlled environment. 

I thought you said you guys live in a 55+ development?

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