My boss keeps asking my gf/co-worker, instead of asking me this.

[ShyViolet]

Oh my goodness.  NO, NO NO.  What she is doing is completely inappropriate and disrespectful to you.  Don't let her twist things around and make you think that you're the one with the problem.  You have asked her SEVERAL times not to have these conversations about you to the boss, and not only does she keep doing it, but she's sharing more and more personal and inappropriate information with the boss.  Your boss is being completely unprofessional also in asking these questions.

I didn't realize that your gf is autistic, that explains a lot... maybe that's why she is having such a hard time understanding that this is socially inappropriate.  Honestly I have seen you post so many, many problematic things about this girlfriend, I'm surprised that you haven't started to rethink this whole relationship.  Your girlfriend sounds very immature.

[ironpony]

Oh okay thanks.  Well later on now she said she was sorry and sucks at having boundaries.  She feels she needs to get defensive because she feels hurt if I get mad at the situation it seems, but she says she feels bad for not knowing what is appropriate and what is not.  However, I did read that it's tough for some autistic people to lie their way out of conversations in a sense, if that's true.  So maybe I need to be mindful of that?

But I did tell her that even though she wants more friends and that the office is a friendly environment that I do not think the boss has her best intentions in mind.

She also said that the boss chooses to confide in her information about his personal life and relationship with his partner, and that she feels it's rude if she doesn't do it back therefore.  But just because he confides her and chooses to, I don't think that means she owes it to him back.

Edited December 5, 2021 by ironpony