Texted my boyfriend a bunch of texts. Now what?

[Kyrak]

2 minutes ago, Georgeann said:

You are lucky. Today my boyfriend called me but I rejected the call and he told me to not text him again.

 

I Feel so bad

Sorry to hear that! Perhaps he is angry or mad about something that happened between you? I am not very good in giving advice but one thing that helps me is to take a deep breath and take as much time as I need to process my emotions before reacting or saying or doing something I'll regret. Then you could maybe try one more time to reach out but if he isn't receptive or asks you to not text him again you have no choice but to respect that. It is damn hard and I feel you. Sending you all love and support!

[ExpatInItaly]

3 hours ago, Kyrak said:

He texted: "Hey, sorry was just now seeing it. We can talk a bit later today if you want." 

And did you reply?

[Kyrak]

Yes i told him that we can talk in the evening and that he can call me anytime including love you and he replied: "A friend of mine is coming over from another town in the evening. Let's talk tomorrow".

[Kyrak]

He replied right away when I send my text but i had to go offline cause I was out all day and replied after a while wished him to have fun and that I'm flying tomorrow back and I look forward to meeting him.

[glows]

So he changed the plan to chat with his friend coming over. That’s fine. 

He seems very busy so let him reach out when you’re both back in town.

You’re doing ok. 

[Kyrak]

Just now, glows said:

So he changed the plan to chat with his friend coming over. That’s fine. 

He seems very busy so let him reach out when you’re both back in town.

You’re doing ok. 

Yes indeed. What I wrote is that I'm flying tomorrow and can call him when I arrive. But most likely the next day cause I come quite late like around midnight. 

[Kyrak]

Just now, Kyrak said:

Yes indeed. What I wrote is that I'm flying tomorrow and can call him when I arrive. But most likely the next day cause I come quite late like around midnight. 

Precisely I wrote this: Have fun!! I am coming tomorrow soo I'll call you when I arrive. Looking forward to meeting you!"

[glows]

Ok then do what you said you’d do and give him a call. 👍

[Kyrak]

1 minute ago, glows said:

Ok then do what you said you’d do and give him a call. 👍

Yes! Didn't make sense to chat on viber or videocall since I'll be packing and stuff and can properly call him when I arrive. I should leave it there right? No more texting to tell him that I'm bringing him food as he asked me and wanna give it to him. Does it seem like he's avoiding me?

[stillafool]

35 minutes ago, Kyrak said:

I should leave it there right?

Yes leave it right as it is.  No more texting, let him text you next to talk.

 

36 minutes ago, Kyrak said:

Does it seem like he's avoiding me?

Why now are you asking this after having spoken to him and you know the plan?

[Kyrak]

Just now, stillafool said:

Yes leave it right as it is.  No more texting, let him text you next to talk.

 

Why now are you asking this after having spoken to him and you know the plan?

Cause of how i might have overwhelmed him with texting and he might not feel like talking to me. I mean he texted me in the morning and asked me to speak later if I wanted but I told him I'll be out all day and to call me in the night so then he suggested to speak tomorrow cause his friend is coming over in the evening. Okay I am over thinking it. I guess it's because I thought he needed space from me.

[Kyrak]

Would have been nice if he would come and pick me up from the airport but he didn't suggest that so I haven't asked. 

[Wiseman2]

1 hour ago, Kyrak said:

Would have been nice if he would come and pick me up from the airport but he didn't suggest that so I haven't asked. 

Talk when you're in person. In the meantime simply scale back on the texting and respond/reply, but don't double text.

It's rude not to wait for a response before going on.

Edited December 26, 2021 by Wiseman2

[Kyrak]

8 minutes ago, Wiseman2 said:

Talk when you're in person. In the meantime simply scale back on the texting and respond/reply, but don't double text.

It's rude not to wait for a response before going on.

Yes correctly. I did reply and didn't initiate more texts although I saw a funny meme would love to share (we used to share those sometimes).

[stillafool]

1 minute ago, Kyrak said:

Yes correctly. I did reply and didn't initiate more texts although I saw a funny meme would love to share (we used to share those sometimes).

Good, don't initiate more texts just wait until you see him in person.  You can address your concern at that time to clear the air and get a better understanding of where this relationship is going.  It does seem a bit off to me.

[Kyrak]

1 minute ago, stillafool said:

Good, don't initiate more texts just wait until you see him in person.  You can address your concern at that time to clear the air and get a better understanding of where this relationship is going.  It does seem a bit off to me.

I'm thinking to break up with him cause it feels not having a boyfriend and it really doesn't worth this anxiety. I'm just sad at the moment and cant think straight. Not sure if it's in my head and I'm overreacting or something is indeed off. Don't feel like talking with him anymore tbh. I'm feeling hurt and disappointed.

[stillafool]

1 minute ago, Kyrak said:

I'm thinking to break up with him cause it feels not having a boyfriend and it really doesn't worth this anxiety. I'm just sad at the moment and cant think straight. Not sure if it's in my head and I'm overreacting or something is indeed off. Don't feel like talking with him anymore tbh. I'm feeling hurt and disappointed.

I'm sorry my statement triggered you to want to call it off before actually speaking to him when he gets back.  Just wait until he contacts you and you've had a chance to collect yourself.  After a few days you will have a better idea of what to do.

[Kyrak]

3 minutes ago, stillafool said:

I'm sorry my statement triggered you to want to call it off before actually speaking to him when he gets back.  Just wait until he contacts you and you've had a chance to collect yourself.  After a few days you will have a better idea of what to do.

Thanks a lot! Don't worry about it. This is something I have been thinking myself and so it's not like it didn't cross my mind. However part of being a mature grown up is to communicate in an honest way and express your concerns before jumping into conclusions. I am really trying to live by this standard and your perspective and comments did help a lot understand better how to best handle this situation and being respectful of other people's time and space. Kudos!

[Kyrak]

Just now, Kyrak said:

Thanks a lot! Don't worry about it. This is something I have been thinking myself and so it's not like it didn't cross my mind. However part of being a mature grown up is to communicate in an honest way and express your concerns before jumping into conclusions. I am really trying to live by this standard and your perspective and comments did help a lot understand better how to best handle this situation and being respectful of other people's time and space. Kudos!

He did reply: cant wait, do call me baby!

[stillafool]

18 hours ago, Kyrak said:

Okay. We also made nye plans to which I already transferred him money so we'll need to talk at some point and make plans. I shared with him via picture the dress I'll be wearing and he replied that he can't wait to see me wearing it. I have my flight back on Monday and I'll have credit to call as we mostly communicate via phone and SMS not viber. It was only because i didn't have credit.

I'm sorry I just saw this post.  You said "I already transferred him money"?  Are you the one paying for the NYE plans?  Why are you giving him money?

[Kyrak]

4 minutes ago, stillafool said:

I'm sorry I just saw this post.  You said "I already transferred him money"?  Are you the one paying for the NYE plans?  Why are you giving him money?

He paid for the tickets to the club already for 2 people and asked me to be his +1 a month ago so I transferred him my share this week when I got paid. He didn't ask me to do that but I wanted to cause it was a lot of money.

[stillafool]

Just now, Kyrak said:

He didn't ask me to do that but I wanted to cause it was a lot of money.

Well that was nice of you to do.  I hope you have a good time.  Yeah at this point I would just wait it out.

[Kyrak]

1 minute ago, stillafool said:

Well that was nice of you to do.  I hope you have a good time.  Yeah at this point I would just wait it out.

Yeah. He asked me to call him tomorrow when I arrive so I'll call its the proper thing to do. I also made some meatballs with my mother's recipe which he likes and some traditional food to take to his family so I'd love to give it to him regardless of what might happen next since I promised him this and it's like my christmas gift.

[glows]

No, he is not avoiding you. You both have plans to meet or speak when you’re less busy. You were going to call him. There are plans also in place for NYE. 

You mentioned wishing he picked you up from the airport. That would have been nice but not a requirement. Have your own plans. Don’t rely on anyone to pick you up. 

However if you do feel you’re putting more effort into this than he is, if you feel you’re anticipating and hanging off of his every word and action because you’re not receiving in return what you are available to give, move on. 

Go slow and see what he’s about. It’s a great time as you’re checking each other out dating. I’d also take the time to appreciate a partner who has an active social or personal life. When your lives come together it’s that much more interesting and engaging. There are blessings but know what your boundaries and limits are in terms of being compatible.