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[UPDATE] Dating a cancer patient who… blew me off?


Kansasbbq10

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37 minutes ago, Alvi said:

He did use you as an emotional pillow and discarded you soon after you no longer needed. As soon as you placed some demands, he is poof, gone.  I am going to cut him some slack since he is fighting to survive. I don't think he was expecting for a chemo to be that hard, maybe he never meant to lead you on in a first place. But regardless, he did just that. He used your good nature and your nurturing instincts to fit his needs.

How could you possibly know this? For all we know, he may have liked her just fine, then when she mentioned meeting her child, he got spooked by the commitment. He may have lost feelings or interest. Maybe he could sense hostility from her. 

There’s no way to know why he ended things unless he’s willing to offer up that information, but just because she held his hand during chemo doesn’t mean he was using her one bit. 

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  • 6 months later...
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Kansasbbq10

[UPDATE]

We didn't speak for months. I totally moved on. Then he started texting me again. Inviting me to do platonic activities but I was never free. Then finally i came over his place as we planned to go to this cool spot near his house. We!l we just got lost in conversation \ catching up and then...He made a move! We fooled around a bit but it was way more than wed ever done for those months we dated! Now he's texting a normal amount for a guy who's interested , seems very into me. But we didn't talk much for those months he was still going through cancer!  seems like he's ultimately wanting a relationship from comments he made. I don't know what to think ?

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ClearEyes-FullHeart

If you like him, take it day by day and just begin dating.

Given all he was going through during his chemo and recovery, he needed to be alone to heal. It sounds like you were an amazing friend and support to him at that time, but he just needed isolation. Now he is feeling well and is ready to start dating. Good luck to you both….no need to rush or get ahead of things just let it unfold and see if you are both a match.

If you are no longer available or interested that is also fair.

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ExpatInItaly
1 hour ago, Kansasbbq10 said:

But we didn't talk much for those months he was still going through cancer! 

That's to be expected. He wasn't concentrating on anything but surviving. 

If you are still interested, you can see where it goes.

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