Concerns about my parents mentioning weight to any dates

[caliguy93029]

Hi. I’m into big women. My parents have gotten on me about weight like my dad said my stomach is big. They did it for health reasons though. Mind you my dad remarked to his adult niece 10 years ago how she should lose Weight and his friend about his weight. That causes me to be scared about them mentioning weight to any dates. They said they won’t but I realize I’m in a process. Process? Unfortunately a Process of realizing they are not that harsh. Like I’m scared my dad will remark to any gf about weight bc he said to his friend and niece. 
1. how likely would they say something if I didn’t mention my concern?

2.how much am I in the wrong here? I want to post texts with my mom and chats with my friend but I can’t.

3. How likely is it my parents will think “who cares if we upset our son?? What’s he going to do about it?!”

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Edited February 9, 2022 by caliguy93029

[Wiseman2]

33 minutes ago, caliguy93029 said:

1. how likely would they say something if I didn’t mention my concern?

2.how much am I in the wrong here? I want to post texts with my mom and chats with my friend but I can’t.

3. How likely is it my parents will think “who cares if we upset our son?? What’s he going to do about it?!”

Do you live at home? Why are you so terrified about your parents controlling your love life and being rude to your dates?

Do not post personal communication on any online format. It's irresponsible.

Why can't you date whatever women you want? Are you overweight?  Is that your concern?

Why would your parents say obnoxious things to women you date? 

Don't bring women to meet them or home until you get your own place.

Edited February 9, 2022 by Wiseman2

[glows]

59 minutes ago, caliguy93029 said:

Hi. I’m into big women. My parents have gotten on me about weight like my dad said my stomach is big. They did it for health reasons though. Mind you my dad remarked to his adult niece 10 years ago how she should lose Weight and his friend about his weight. That causes me to be scared about them mentioning weight to any dates. They said they won’t but I realize I’m in a process. Process? Unfortunately a Process of realizing they are not that harsh. Like I’m scared my dad will remark to any gf about weight bc he said to his friend and niece. 
1. how likely would they say something if I didn’t mention my concern?

2.how much am I in the wrong here? I want to post texts with my mom and chats with my friend but I can’t.

3. How likely is it my parents will think “who cares if we upset our son?? What’s he going to do about it?!”

 

How old are you, OP? Are you still living with your parents? Your family will find it hard to resist commenting on any romantic interest anyway, as most families would. There's nothing you can do about that if they have a history of being extra nosy and disrespectful towards whom you date. 

Fat or overweight people are treated terribly by society and bullied quite a lot. I think you have good intentions but over-worrying about a situation that also has not presented itself. 

Don't post any personal chats/texts on the forum.

 

 

[caliguy93029]

2 hours ago, glows said:

How old are you, OP? Are you still living with your parents? Your family will find it hard to resist commenting on any romantic interest anyway, as most families would. There's nothing you can do about that if they have a history of being extra nosy and disrespectful towards whom you date. 

Fat or overweight people are treated terribly by society and bullied quite a lot. I think you have good intentions but over-worrying about a situation that also has not presented itself. 

Don't post any personal chats/texts on the forum.

 

 

My parents do not have any history of that and I’m 30. With that said how paranoid do I sound since they said they won’t care to comment about my dates weight?

[caliguy93029]

3 hours ago, Wiseman2 said:

Do you live at home? Why are you so terrified about your parents controlling your love life and being rude to your dates?

Do not post personal communication on any online format. It's irresponsible.

Why can't you date whatever women you want? Are you overweight?  Is that your concern?

Why would your parents say obnoxious things to women you date? 

Don't bring women to meet them or home until you get your own place.

I livr with them and they said they won’t care to comment on her weight. They only remarked on mine bc of health concerns.

[chillii]

[ ] Ask your dad not to mention it.

Edited February 10, 2022 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
off topic

[Wiseman2]

6 hours ago, caliguy93029 said:

I livr with them and they said they won’t care to comment on her weight. They only remarked on mine bc of health concerns.

Perhaps it's time to focus on getting your own place. If you are financially and otherwise dependent on your parents,they may be concerned about that. 

Get to a physician about your overall physical and mental health. See if you are clinically overweight and if it's a health issues.

Don't bring dates home. Get a second job and focus on getting your own place.

[glows]

8 hours ago, caliguy93029 said:

My parents do not have any history of that and I’m 30. With that said how paranoid do I sound since they said they won’t care to comment about my dates weight?

It seems less of paranoia and more fixating on a topic that doesn’t seem helpful to you at all or your current situation. You’re fixated on what your family says or thinks instead of finding your own place and gaining more independence. 

Move out and date whom you want. Is there a reason you are staying with your parents? Is it due to your health? 

If you live with your parents you’ll also have to live with any possible running commentary in the same way people who have roommates have less privacy. You’ve also expressed clearly that certain comments are not appreciated or unwanted. Good for you for establishing boundaries. Take care of your health too. 

Edited February 10, 2022 by glows