spyderchaz Posted October 22, 2005 Posted October 22, 2005 So my girlfriend of 2 years moved out on sept 29th and broke it off on the 11th of october and said she loved me but didnt see a future with us. Also she told me that she liked taller guys and the last couple times she saw me i looked really short, also honestly i was never your type. my thing is it got broke off kinda out of nowhere didn't see it coming at all. So she started staying with her friend megan and her boyfriend jeff till she figured out what to do which at this point would only be to move back to her parents house which would be going backwards. So my thing is i have being doing NC for almost 2 weeks now. And i mean this girl loved me so much like 2 days before she moved out.....but what i think happened was her best friend moved in a month before we broke up and it killed our intimacy our friendship cause she would always talk to her.....is she wanting to move on after a 2 yr relationship because she wants to test the water or because she is really indeed over me i really don't know...she said when she moved out that she wanted independence because she is only 21 and was with me since she was 19.....also that she wanted to experience more....so i dont know i am completely crushed still because i am living in the apartment that we shared the lease on and no sign of her at all really dont know waht to do. thank you if anyone can help.
stjarna Posted October 22, 2005 Posted October 22, 2005 "she liked taller guys and the last couple times she saw me i looked really short" that's a really biatchy thing to say . . . and somewhat pointless after being together for two years. you mentioned in the subject that she's interested in someone else, how do you know? if she is, she is probably pursuing that relationship to make it easier to leave you . . . it's never easy breaking up, but if it's not going to work out, better to know sooner than later. sorry, dude.
J dub Posted October 22, 2005 Posted October 22, 2005 >Also she told me that she liked taller guys and the last couple times she saw me i looked really short Um, hello...shallow? Party of one? Jezus this girl is harsh. >And i mean this girl loved me so much like 2 days before she moved out These things dont fall out of nowhere, chances are she was entertaining the idea of breaking up long before the actual action took place, you just had no idea because us females are extremely sneaky >but what i think happened was her best friend moved in a month before we broke up and it killed our intimacy our friendship cause she would always talk to her Doubtful, if anything it was the girl who reminded her of what life is like without you and THATS what fueled her fire to get out. But female/female chat is TOTALLY different that talks with female/male (esp two in a relationship) so I highly doubt it was this friend that "replaced" you as you seem to suggest. >is she wanting to move on after a 2 yr relationship because she wants to test the water or because she is really indeed over me i really don't know Either way, she wanted out. Thats enough for you to say...dont let the door hit you in the a$$. >she wanted independence because she is only 21 and was with me since she was 19.....also that she wanted to experience more Generally its good that a girl recognize she needs to get out and experience life because seriously think about it: in 10 yrs youre married w/ 2 kids and all the sudden she cries, "I CANT TAKE THIS ANYMORE I NEED OUT!" and youre sitting there stunned like where the hell did this come from???? So better to know now, than later, right?? >so i dont know i am completely crushed still because i am living in the apartment that we shared the lease Any way you can sublease or get out somehow? Being there is probably similar to being stuck in a relationship graveyard w/ memories galore...
meltwithme Posted October 22, 2005 Posted October 22, 2005 Jdub, you have some of the best advice I’ve read on this site. I would like to ask for your help in private if that’s ok with you, I can’t send pm’s but if you feel comfortable my email is in my profile. I saw NC worked for you and would do spyder good in this situation, it has for me.
downcydeguy Posted October 22, 2005 Posted October 22, 2005 I will say this for as long as I live my friend. SHE'S 21!!! Please read through this site and you will see that this is by far one of the most commonly posted phrases on here: "...she's 21..." I've now had this happen to me TWICE in my life and will not go through it again. Something happens in a woman's brain/heart when she turns 21. Seemingly overnight she feels suffocated and needs to "explore" and see what's out there. However, Jdub is right about it being better now than later. It just sucks to go through heartbreak - no matter what age you are. Please remember to date only those over 21 in the future my friend. Good luck.
westernxer Posted October 22, 2005 Posted October 22, 2005 "...she's 21..." Yep, that says it all. *chuckle*
Rocko Posted October 22, 2005 Posted October 22, 2005 *Standard Reply* "Hello, welcome to the People With Young Ex's Who Are Clueless Club. In Order to help serve you better, please look up posts by eddpad, lostinmymind, Super83Rex, and dprelz. We hope you will feel better soon!" In all seriousness though, Westernxer is right. This happens very often (I know, I went through it a few months back). Take some comfort in the fact that you're not alone. We're here for you.
Drivetildriven Posted October 23, 2005 Posted October 23, 2005 It's been my experience that even 24 is no better than 21. Date older women.
Still_In_Love Posted October 24, 2005 Posted October 24, 2005 Hey I have to agree with the others. I am coming up to 2 months after the woman I loved broke my heart and now I am finding out more than what I originally new. I am still hurt, but listened to the opinion on this site. First NC...I did it for 2 weeks and was phoned most days. Finally after seeing her with a guy who lied about me to her, I wrote her a letter telling her how hurt I was, how disrespected I feel and told her I am no longer around to even talk to ...ever!! She is ticked becuase I told her the facts and I am no longer on the back burner for her.... Time to cut your losses and move forward..it's true!! It hurts now, but be thanksful it didn't smack you in the butt 5- 10 years from now! AND....21....too young!!!
the_dude077 Posted October 24, 2005 Posted October 24, 2005 Guys...not only is 21 a tough age - try the transitional 28. Especially if the girl is going through a tough time. It's awful. I'd rather take the 21 girl, because you just know that she's not going to want to be together and want to explore options. Easier. They are young. Lets move to 28, you hear "let;'s be together, let's get a dog, let's move in together, and then BOOM. Over. You assume at that age they are making decisions. But what they are doing is testing. Not sure. Makes it SUPER hard, because you have to balance is "she testing the water, so shut that thought of moving in, down" OR "better not dimiss this thought, because she might actually want to be moving in" Anyways, something to chew on tonight.
J dub Posted October 24, 2005 Posted October 24, 2005 Jdub, you have some of the best advice I’ve read on this site. I would like to ask for your help in private if that’s ok with you, I can’t send pm’s but if you feel comfortable my email is in my profile. I saw NC worked for you and would do spyder good in this situation, it has for me. Thanks I can try, go ahead and PM me.
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