Lotsgoingon Posted February 22, 2022 Share Posted February 22, 2022 Hmmm ... your last post makes me think that yes, you're having a great time with him, but he's just slightly ambivalent and non-committal. Which can be really anxiety-provoking for a person in your situation. Don't push things and don't jump when he makes himself available or communicates---don't just unless you feel safe. Sounds like you need to have the "what is going on here?" conversation in order to feel safe. Better, however, is to just chill as you're doing. If it feels uncertain, it is uncertain. I would say the uncertainty you're feeling is a red flag in itself. Somehow he is keeping more distance than what feels right for you. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted February 22, 2022 Share Posted February 22, 2022 17 hours ago, Emmylou_H said: @basil67Also, I don’t think there is a “too soon” to say you love someone if you really feel it. And we seem to be on the same page with that. I think love means something different for everyone. But I do agree with you that just seeing how this grows/pans out and moving slow for now would be a great idea. I would like to just move slow to ensure I don’t get these “in over my head” kind of feelings when I can’t be with him. Perhaps @Lotsgoingon's post above describes it better than me. To be clear, I'm only raising this because you're wary about being hurt....and these early declarations of love between you puts you at such high risk of hurt. There is no rule about when to say ILY, but as you want to protect your heart, it's highly advisable to be putting a caveat on this love you feel. As in, secretly reminding yourself that it's feeling really great being together, but it's early days and you really don't know each other all that well yet. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
NuevoYorko Posted February 23, 2022 Share Posted February 23, 2022 7 hours ago, Emmylou_H said: @NuevoYorko I would say we have hung out around 10 days so far? We spend the entire day together, often long weekends. So I suppose this has actually been going on for a little over a month now? I’m giving him/this space. Haven’t spoken to him at all today and I’m trying my best to focus on things in my life. Also looking into how to build resiliency as well. OK. I'm not here to challenge your timeline, but this is completely different than dating for one month, and meeting up every other weekend within that time span. I don't think you can get much help here when we don't actually know what is going on. How about you just spend whatever time together works for both of you and see where it leads. Try to enjoy it. That's the best I can do. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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