FMW Posted February 22, 2022 Share Posted February 22, 2022 For me, 4 hours is a long time for a hang out with a friend, unless it's an evening socializing with couples. Even then, they don't last much if any longer than 4 hours. I understand you don't feel that you are being needy or expecting too much, but just reading what you've posted leads me to have the opinion that you are. If she sees things similarly, she might feel that your interest in time together is too intense and drains her energy. That's going to lessen her enjoyment of being with you over time, which might be what you are picking up on. Questioning her about what you perceive her reactions to your conversation topics are only magnifies it. Your view of how much time she spends with others might not be accurate. And as pointed out by someone else, socializing in larger groups instead of one on one is naturally going to result in longer periods together. It would be nice if you could find a friend who has similar needs and views of time spent together. But as this experience and the other friendship you posted about shows, you are probably going to find that most people are going to have more limited time to share with just one particular friend one on one. It doesn't mean the friend isn't important. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author josi334 Posted February 23, 2022 Author Share Posted February 23, 2022 This is not just about the time we spent together, it is the fact that I sense that she is "not eager" to spend time with me as she is with some other people. We actually spent close to 4 hours because I had asked if she wanted come over after to have some of the dessert I had made, otherwise it wouldn't even be 2 hours. She has complained to me about people who want to just meet for short a period of time, saying that it feels like a "doctor's appointment". And no, it is not just in groups that she spends long periods when hanging out with people, it is also with just one friend. And yes, I am trying to make other friends or meet new people that it will show more eagerness to spend time with me. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted February 23, 2022 Share Posted February 23, 2022 22 minutes ago, josi334 said: And yes, I am trying to make other friends or meet new people that it will show more eagerness to spend time with me. Well this is good. It's probably that your friendship has run it's course and entering a new stage. It happens and you're smart to meet additional friends. Link to post Share on other sites
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