Crush on very good-looking and popular guy in school

[Katie02]

3 minutes ago, poppyfields said:

Katie, one last piece of unsolicited advice.  Please refrain from asking his friends or others about him.  He will certainly find out and this is NOT cool.

Not to mention, friends can lie, and sorry but you simply cannot believe everything you hear.

The only way to get to know who he is and what he's about is by spending time with him yourself, and observing his actions.

Best to keep it all in proper perspective which is, you haven't even been on one date yet, try and stay chill if you can.

Good luck and keep us updated.

 

Thanks a lot. ^-^
I will see how it feels to be with him tomorrow, and then I will hopefully start to feel comfortable enough with him to be alone with him at home in the near future, if things turn out well.

[princessaurora]

15 minutes ago, poppyfields said:

You and I must be kindred spirits (we share the same style of OLDing too!) cause the same thing happened to me with my long term ex (six year relationship).   When we met, I was also prepared to be just another notch but we ended up dating six years!

Dating, not OLD, poppy. lol But yes, you remind me so much of my premarriage self and if I were single today, and using OLD,  I would use the same style you do because it suits my personality. 

Wow, 6 yrs, now that's a success story! It was so funny when that dude called me the next day after our first date sex and asked if I wanted to go on another one. I was beyond stunned. 😆

[Katie02]

That sounds like great experiences for both of you. ^-^
It must have been really wonderful to have it work out like that.

Hopefully, I will be that lucky myself. ^-^

[princessaurora]

Just try to relax and live in the moment. Y'all are just studying and getting to know each other a bit better. Expect nothing else and just see where it goes. 

Good luck! 

[SumGuy]

3 hours ago, Katie02 said:

By the way, I was just curious how you think I should interpret his responses to me so far?
I do feel like he must be interested to some degree, but I hope I am not making overly positive assumptions.

Good not make too many assumptions but all signs point to he is in to you and is signaling it with the touch...I would never do that with a woman viewed as just friends.  Those are exactly, for me, the kind of physical contact would do while flirting and communicating I think she is all that.

I think he digs you and attracted to you.

[SumGuy]

3 hours ago, Katie02 said:

I am not really in any great need for help from him, haha;
that was mostly something that I said just to carry on my conversation with him, and the stuff that I do find a bit challenging is something that I feel that I could get through on my own with a little bit of work, and those things are just unclear enough to me so that I can genuinely ask him for help with that. ^-^

I am not sure if he was just being friendly when he made light touches on my arms and my back, but it seems like that was a way for him to flirt with me.

100% a way to flirt.  Bet all you need to do when studying is siddle up close to him and lean in with him over the book and he'll kiss you, or you him.

I always had a rule on homework, similar to some people have a no sex on the first date rule, no making out until we complete at least one homework problem  

[Katie02]

1 minute ago, SumGuy said:

100% a way to flirt.  Bet all you need to do when studying is siddle up close to him and lean in with him over the book and he'll kiss you, or you him.

I always had a rule on homework, similar to some people have a no sex on the first date rule, no making out until we complete at least one homework problem  

Haha, I will definitely sit next to him and close to him.

I have quite complicated feelings about this at the moment;
I don't want to get any false hopes up, but then I think about the ways that he has made physical contact with me and how we have gazed into each other's eye for a long time on several occasions, and all of that has certainly felt like flirting, so I dare to feel quite hopeful about everything.

[SumGuy]

11 minutes ago, Katie02 said:

Haha, I will definitely sit next to him and close to him.

I have quite complicated feelings about this at the moment;
I don't want to get any false hopes up, but then I think about the ways that he has made physical contact with me and how we have gazed into each other's eye for a long time on several occasions, and all of that has certainly felt like flirting, so I dare to feel quite hopeful about everything.

I believe it would be a premature hope to think this is more than great chemistry at the moment.  It can be fun to think how this could last, I did that all the time...but knew how to keep the fantasy from having me get weird.  All that being said, it's a good start.

I don't think it is unreasonable to think he is into you and you'll be making out and not get much homework done.

[Katie02]

7 minutes ago, SumGuy said:

I believe it would be a premature hope to think this is more than great chemistry at the moment.  It can be fun to think how this could last, I did that all the time...but knew how to keep the fantasy from having me get weird.  All that being said, it's a good start.

I don't think it is unreasonable to think he is into you and you'll be making out and not get much homework done.

That is what it feels like, haha.
I am aware that I should control my excitement, but that is very hard!

Edited March 4, 2022 by Katie02

[SumGuy]

Just now, Katie02 said:

That is what it feels like, haha.
I am aware that I should manage my excitement, but that is very hard!

I'm old enough to just be me.  I revel in the excitement, enthusiasm, passion and anticipation, savor it I say.  It's a wine that does not get better with age.    Doesn't sound like you are acting in an over the top way based on it.  Just be sure to not start planning out a future with him or even mention necessarily after the first date you seeing it/wanting it.  Certainly if he asks can answer honestly

Not saying play games.  Be honest with how you feel about it, how much you are enjoying him (if that is the case), want to see him again etc.  One can do that honestly and enthusiastically without putting expectations on someone.  If you are into each other it will blossom into more soon enough on its own.

[Katie02]

31 minutes ago, SumGuy said:

I'm old enough to just be me.  I revel in the excitement, enthusiasm, passion and anticipation, savor it I say.  It's a wine that does not get better with age.    Doesn't sound like you are acting in an over the top way based on it.  Just be sure to not start planning out a future with him or even mention necessarily after the first date you seeing it/wanting it.  Certainly if he asks can answer honestly

Not saying play games.  Be honest with how you feel about it, how much you are enjoying him (if that is the case), want to see him again etc.  One can do that honestly and enthusiastically without putting expectations on someone.  If you are into each other it will blossom into more soon enough on its own.

So far, it has definitely felt like we have been into each other.
Both times when we have talked we have hesitated to leave each other, and we have found each other gazing into each other's eyes for long moments and smiling to each other.

Of course, it is pretty hard to perfectly describe those situations, but I have felt a really really strong connection;
It feels like we would have excellent chemistry if we spent more time together, and I guess I will notice this tomorrow. ^-^
I mean, I literally shivered and felt exhilarated every time he touched me, and I found myself giggling really easily, and I am sure that I was blushing a lot as well.

Edited March 4, 2022 by Katie02

[Wiseman2]

9 hours ago, Katie02 said:

 I dare to feel quite hopeful about everything.

Try not to let nerves/anxiety run the show. Have fun studying together without all the futuristic angst, catastrophizing or worrying.

One step at a time. Relax, be friendly, natural and yourself. If you are too distracted to pay attention to studying together, it will make it awkward and off-putting.

[Katie02]

Oh, this is going wonderful at the moment - much better than I ever dared to hope just a while ago. ^-^

We spent the first 5-10 minutes or so on talking about studies, but we quickly got bored of that and started to have a conversation instead.
He asked me about myself and seemed very interested in me, and I asked a lot about him, and we found out a lot of things about each other, and this time we had an even stronger connection than during our last converstaions.
Then we got one of those long quiet eye contacts again, and I started to feel shy and quiet, and ended up resting my head on his shoulder, and he gave me a light push on the side of my chin to get me to look at him, and then he kissed me on the lips.
I didn't know how to react to that, other than to feel overjoyed, and then we continued talking for a while and found ourselves kissing each other on random occasions, until it ended with long unbroken tongue-kissing and cuddling that easily lasted several minutes. ^-^

He asked if we could meet some time this weekend, and he suggested visiting the local spa in our town (that spa has a jacuzzi that is partly blocked by half-transparent walls, so that sounds perfect!), and I was thinking that we maybe could watch movies together.
I haven't decided exaclty what I want to do yet, but we have each other's phone numbers, so I will definitely talk to him about that later today, and tomorrow. ^-^

I guess it is "safer" to follow him to the spa, but it is also more tempting to follow him home, although i am not sure if it is the right time for that yet.
But both options sound wonderful! ^-^

Edited March 4, 2022 by Katie02

[Marcus87]

On 3/4/2022 at 8:24 PM, Katie02 said:

Oh, this is going wonderful at the moment - much better than I ever dared to hope just a while ago. ^-^

We spent the first 5-10 minutes or so on talking about studies, but we quickly got bored of that and started to have a conversation instead.
He asked me about myself and seemed very interested in me, and I asked a lot about him, and we found out a lot of things about each other, and this time we had an even stronger connection than during our last converstaions.
Then we got one of those long quiet eye contacts again, and I started to feel shy and quiet, and ended up resting my head on his shoulder, and he gave me a light push on the side of my chin to get me to look at him, and then he kissed me on the lips.
I didn't know how to react to that, other than to feel overjoyed, and then we continued talking for a while and found ourselves kissing each other on random occasions, until it ended with long unbroken tongue-kissing and cuddling that easily lasted several minutes. ^-^

He asked if we could meet some time this weekend, and he suggested visiting the local spa in our town (that spa has a jacuzzi that is partly blocked by half-transparent walls, so that sounds perfect!), and I was thinking that we maybe could watch movies together.
I haven't decided exaclty what I want to do yet, but we have each other's phone numbers, so I will definitely talk to him about that later today, and tomorrow. ^-^

I guess it is "safer" to follow him to the spa, but it is also more tempting to follow him home, although i am not sure if it is the right time for that yet.
But both options sound wonderful! ^-^

That sounds great so far, IMO.

I might be a bit late, but I would suggest that you start with visiting the spa together - that feels like a good continuation from your kissing during your study time, and then after that you could probably proceed with the date at his or your place.

If his friends have assured you that he is the kind type, and if he doesn't have any bad reputation at all, then I would guess that it is fine if you are alone together in the near future.

[Katie02]

1 hour ago, Marcus87 said:

That sounds great so far, IMO.

I might be a bit late, but I would suggest that you start with visiting the spa together - that feels like a good continuation from your kissing during your study time, and then after that you could probably proceed with the date at his or your place.

If his friends have assured you that he is the kind type, and if he doesn't have any bad reputation at all, then I would guess that it is fine if you are alone together in the near future.

Yes, that is what it feels like. ^-^
We actually went to the spa together in the morning yesterday, which was our first true date, and I find myself being more and more drawn to him.
We talked, kissed and just spent time with each other, and I wished that that moment would have never ended.

We will go out on dinner together today this evening, and I really want to follow him home after that;
what are your thoughts about that?
I mean, his friends have told me that he is a great guy, he seems to have a very good reputation, and I feel completely comfortable with him, so it feels like it should be the right time.

[princessaurora]

Well, he's escalating fast just as I predicted. He got you to make out with him at the study session and got you in a hot tub on the first date. Now you're seeing him again tonight and talking about following him home like you're a puppy. lol  I wouldn't invite yourself to his place, but if he extends an invite you can decide if you want to go.  You could also invite him to yours if you are ready to sleep with him, but I would still guard my heart because you don't know him well enough to know what his intentions are and now you're about to to see him for the 3rd time in less than 72 hrs. Could this be a situation that turns into  a relationship? Yes, possibly. But there are far more stories about these kind of situations crashing and burning. Just tread carefully and expect nothing more than an opportunity to have sex with a superhot guy. That mindset will be the best thing for you at this point in time.  

Keep us posted! 

[Wiseman2]

3 hours ago, Katie02 said:

 ^-^
We will go out on dinner together today this evening, and I really want to follow him home after that.  so it feels like it should be the right time.

Is this your first BF? Or are you hoping to have your first sexual encounter with him? Does he live with his parents or roommates?

People hookup after one or two dates, so that's up to you.

[Katie02]

19 minutes ago, princessaurora said:

Well, he's escalating fast just as I predicted. He got you to make out with him at the study session and got you in a hot tub on the first date. Now you're seeing him again tonight and talking about following him home like you're a puppy. lol  I wouldn't invite yourself to his place, but if he extends an invite you can decide if you want to go.  You could also invite him to yours if you are ready to sleep with him, but I would still guard my heart because you don't know him well enough to know what his intentions are and now you're about to to see him for the 3rd time in less than 72 hrs. Could this be a situation that turns into  a relationship? Yes, possibly. But there are far more stories about these kind of situations crashing and burning. Just tread carefully and expect nothing more than an opportunity to have sex with a superhot guy. That mindset will be the best thing for you at this point in time.  

Keep us posted! 

I guess it might be pretty fast, but we have connected so well every time we have met and talked about a lot of things together. ^-^
I have also been eager myself to spend a lot of time with him, so I guess I may have made it go quick.

I guess I will wait a little while longer with following him home;
it's just that we seem to have wonderful chemistry, and we have already told each other a lot of things about ourselves.
We spent about 4-5 hours together yesterday, and did other things except for the spa visit, such as taking a walk together and just sitting and talking, and it really feels wonderful so far. ^-^

But I guess we should perhaps slow it down just a little bit, for the time being.
 

14 minutes ago, Wiseman2 said:

Is this your first BF? Or are you hoping to have your first sexual encounter with him? Does he live with his parents or roommates?

People hookup after one or two dates, so that's up to you.

He has said that he has an own apartment, which is close to the university, so that would be great. ^-^

I have had a couple boyfriends in the past, but this is the first guy that I have felt really really interested in to this level.

Edited March 6, 2022 by Katie02

[princessaurora]

12 minutes ago, Katie02 said:

I guess it might be pretty fast, but we have connected so well every time we have met and talked about a lot of things together. ^-^
I have also been eager myself to spend a lot of time with him, so I guess I may have made it go quick.

I guess I will wait a little while longer with following him home;
it's just that we seem to have wonderful chemistry, and we have already told each other a lot of things about ourselves.
We spent about 4-5 hours together yesterday, and did other things except for the spa visit, such as taking a walk together and just sitting and talking, and it really feels wonderful so far. ^-^

But I guess we should perhaps slow it down just a little bit, for the time being.
 

Just follow your instincts. If your goal is just to bang a really hot guy and you can keep your emotions out of it, then proceed with that. But if you see potential for something more. then maybe not jump from kissing to piv in one date. You could do things between kissing and piv iykwim. It's totally up to you. But I wouldn't invite myself to his place, let him invite you. And if the vibe is strong and you end up in his bed, then just go with it, but just live in the present moment and don't think about the future. 

Have fun whatever you decide:)

[stillafool]

1 hour ago, Katie02 said:

I have had a couple boyfriends in the past, but this is the first guy that I have felt really really interested in to this level.

At first you wanted him to be your FWB and now you are saying "boyfriend", has that changed?

[Katie02]

  

17 minutes ago, princessaurora said:

Just follow your instincts. If your goal is just to bang a really hot guy and you can keep your emotions out of it, then proceed with that. But if you see potential for something more. then maybe not jump from kissing to piv in one date. You could do things between kissing and piv iykwim. It's totally up to you. But I wouldn't invite myself to his place, let him invite you. And if the vibe is strong and you end up in his bed, then just go with it, but just live in the present moment and don't think about the future. 

Have fun whatever you decide:)

I definitely feel that there will come something more out of this.
We have had amazing connection every time we have talked to each other, and he is already starting to feel like someone that I have known for much longer than a few days.
I think that this is the main reason why we have developed this quite quickly - we enjoy each other's company a whole lot, and try to spend as much time as possible.
 

20 minutes ago, stillafool said:

At first you wanted him to be your FWB and now you are saying "boyfriend", has that changed?

Yes, I am starting to view him more and more as a boyfriend.