Uruktopi Posted May 18, 2022 Share Posted May 18, 2022 2 minutes ago, Helicon5 said: I'm making her Mediterranean pasta Good choice 3 Link to post Share on other sites
glows Posted May 18, 2022 Share Posted May 18, 2022 32 minutes ago, Helicon5 said: What we talked about must have resonated with her. She just texted me good morning and wish me a great day. She hasn't done that after we've set up a date. 🙂 That's good to hear. Use the wait and see approach and enjoy your next date. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Helicon5 Posted May 18, 2022 Author Share Posted May 18, 2022 I guess now would be a good time to end this 251 reply thread, unless you're all dying to find out if we have sex after dinner on Friday. LOL 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣.......just kiddin'. I'm not making any moves unless she decides to rip my clothes off. I'm not going to stop her. 🤣😂🤣😂 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Alpacalia Posted May 18, 2022 Share Posted May 18, 2022 1 hour ago, Helicon5 said: I guess now would be a good time to end this 251 reply thread, unless you're all dying to find out if we have sex after dinner on Friday. LOL 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣.......just kiddin'. I'm not making any moves unless she decides to rip my clothes off. I'm not going to stop her. 🤣😂🤣😂 Well at least we have a better idea of what's been stressing you out. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted May 18, 2022 Share Posted May 18, 2022 9 hours ago, Helicon5 said: Honestly, I can see why her ex stalked her. She's vague and doesn't let people in. It's too early to tell anything. I'll give it a couple more dates. If I feel she isn't wanting to give more, I'm out. Nobody deserves to be stalked. It's a criminal act and her ex chose to stalk her for his own twisted reasons. I'm glad you won't be wasting too much time on this if it doesn't progress. At the moment, the thill of chase may be enticing but you're really just spinning your wheels and feeling frustrated in the process. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Uruktopi Posted May 18, 2022 Share Posted May 18, 2022 6 hours ago, Helicon5 said: I'm not going to stop her. 🤣😂🤣😂 No???????????????????????? 🤣 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Alpacalia Posted May 18, 2022 Share Posted May 18, 2022 (edited) Mediterranean pasta sounds really good. Just be sure to use the long pasta so you can recreate the whole "Lady and the Tramp" thing. 🍝 + 😃 = 😍 Edited May 18, 2022 by Alpacalia 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Helicon5 Posted May 19, 2022 Author Share Posted May 19, 2022 2 hours ago, Uruktopi said: No???????????????????????? 🤣 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Helicon5 Posted May 19, 2022 Author Share Posted May 19, 2022 2 hours ago, Alpacalia said: Mediterranean pasta sounds really good. Just be sure to use the long pasta so you can recreate the whole "Lady and the Tramp" thing. 🍝 + 😃 = 😍 LOL......right? 😁😁😁 Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted May 19, 2022 Share Posted May 19, 2022 6 hours ago, basil67 said: Nobody deserves to be stalked. It's a criminal act and her ex chose to stalk her for his own twisted reasons. Yeah, what the heck, OP? Being distant or aloof does not make stalking logical or remotely acceptable. Link to post Share on other sites
glows Posted May 19, 2022 Share Posted May 19, 2022 Keep it classy if you want to continue seeing her. Otherwise, break it off. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Helicon5 Posted May 21, 2022 Author Share Posted May 21, 2022 (edited) Okay, so basically another Friday night date that ended the same way as the last two Fridays with me leaving her house at 4:30 a.m. and her saying I probably won't be up, but text me when you get home. Do I? Edited May 21, 2022 by Helicon5 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted May 21, 2022 Share Posted May 21, 2022 21 minutes ago, Helicon5 said: Friday night date that ended the same way as the last two Fridays with me leaving her house at 4:30 a.m. What happened to you making her dinner? Don't stay this long. Leave at a reasonable hour. Focusing on the "I'm home" text seems inconsequential compared to doing the same old routine of hanging out at her place way too long and way too late. This routine seems dull and old. Why can't you two do something interesting or different? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Helicon5 Posted May 21, 2022 Author Share Posted May 21, 2022 (edited) 8 minutes ago, Wiseman2 said: What happened to you making her dinner? Don't stay this long. Leave at a reasonable hour. Focusing on the "I'm home" text seems inconsequential compared to doing the same old routine of hanging out at her place way too long and way too late. This routine seems dull and old. Why can't you two do something interesting or different? We had a nice dinner at my place, then after a couple hours she hinted that she would like to go see a band, and she said she knew a place where we could go, but when we got there, no band playing. From there I was at a loss because all the bands I usually go see we're playing too far away. She was apologetic for dragging me out. At this point it was 10:15 and she said we can end the night here and go guitar shopping tomorrow, but I opted not to do that, in which we ended up back at her place where the same scenario happened. This time she said maybe we can get together on Sunday. Edited May 21, 2022 by Helicon5 Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted May 21, 2022 Share Posted May 21, 2022 (edited) 1 hour ago, Helicon5 said: We had a nice dinner at my place, then after a couple hours she hinted that she would like to go see a band. Ok 👌 good. That the dinner went well. Did you meet her in a bar/club? She seems like a one-trick-pony in that regard. It's always bars and clubs till the wee hours. Don't go shopping together. That's friendzone stuff. Is Friday night all she has? Unless you're a night owl, her vampire hours could get very old very fast. Same with her obsession with bars, clubs and drinks. Why can't she do interesting or daytime or nonalcoholic things? Frankly she seems rather dull. Like some karaoke queen or barfly. This late night bar scene all the time would be a deal breaker for me as well as the avoiding intimacy. She's really way too old for this playing coy stuff combined with her college campus lifestyle. Edited May 21, 2022 by Wiseman2 Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted May 21, 2022 Share Posted May 21, 2022 1 hour ago, Helicon5 said: her saying I probably won't be up, but text me when you get home. Do I? Sure. Why wouldn't you? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
introverted1 Posted May 21, 2022 Share Posted May 21, 2022 2 hours ago, Helicon5 said: We had a nice dinner at my place, then after a couple hours she hinted that she would like to go see a band, and she said she knew a place where we could go, So she got you out of the house and away from an environment where anything could escalate physically. 2 hours ago, Helicon5 said: At this point it was 10:15 and she said we can end the night here and go guitar shopping tomorrow, So how did you end up back at her house until 4am? Whose idea was that and what did you do until 4am? 2 hours ago, Helicon5 said: her saying I probably won't be up, but text me when you get home. Do I? I think this should be the least of your questions. Text or don't text, I fail to see how this will have any bearing on your "relationship" with this woman. 1 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted May 21, 2022 Share Posted May 21, 2022 6 minutes ago, introverted1 said: So she got you out of the house and away from an environment where anything could escalate physically. So how did you end up back at her house until 4am? Whose idea was that and what did you do until 4am? Unfortunately, this is also my take on her maneuver . 2 Link to post Share on other sites
glows Posted May 21, 2022 Share Posted May 21, 2022 4 hours ago, Helicon5 said: We had a nice dinner at my place, then after a couple hours she hinted that she would like to go see a band, and she said she knew a place where we could go, but when we got there, no band playing. From there I was at a loss because all the bands I usually go see we're playing too far away. She was apologetic for dragging me out. At this point it was 10:15 and she said we can end the night here and go guitar shopping tomorrow, but I opted not to do that, in which we ended up back at her place where the same scenario happened. This time she said maybe we can get together on Sunday. In future, go home. See what she's up to on Sunday and stop overthinking those text messages. Not sure why it's such a big deal to text someone you're home and they don't see it till the following morning. If you don't want to, don't do it. She's not forcing you to. It seems you're dating casually and she enjoys your company but this isn't moving at a pace you'd like and you're very anxious all the time. Think back to what you'd like out of a potential partner and rethink what you know about her. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Alpacalia Posted May 21, 2022 Share Posted May 21, 2022 6 hours ago, Helicon5 said: Okay, so basically another Friday night date that ended the same way as the last two Fridays with me leaving her house at 4:30 a.m. and her saying I probably won't be up, but text me when you get home. Do I? Ohh. I take it there was not a lot of pasta... Making. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Uruktopi Posted May 22, 2022 Share Posted May 22, 2022 11 hours ago, Alpacalia said: Ohh. I take it there was not a lot of pasta... Making. May be the pasta was not "al dente", a must of course. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
chillii Posted May 23, 2022 Share Posted May 23, 2022 (edited) On 5/21/2022 at 10:00 PM, introverted1 said: So she got you out of the house and away from an environment where anything could escalate physically. Yeah , it was the perfect situation for things to finally go even a little further, but she wants to go out. Then back to hers later for more nothing on the couch. She might be stringing you a long romantically as a way of keeping you around as a friend and company, but she'd know damn well whether she does or doesn't want more out of you two . Edited May 23, 2022 by chillii 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Alpacalia Posted May 23, 2022 Share Posted May 23, 2022 The two of you have been dating for a month now. That's one month. Not everyone jumps into bed with a new partner right away. In agreement with the other poster, why all the home dates? If you feel that sex is something you want from a relationship one month in then she needs to know that. If you're not on the same page, you have a busy life and don’t have time to spend with someone that’s not compatible. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
chillii Posted May 23, 2022 Share Posted May 23, 2022 (edited) Yeah fully agree that's why l only mentioned "even a little further" . There should be building interest in at least being closer in some ways romanticly, doesn't sound like there's even that. Edited May 23, 2022 by chillii 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Uruktopi Posted May 23, 2022 Share Posted May 23, 2022 (edited) May be because I have some kind of allergia to what may smell like "ambiguous on purpose" (not being the same ambiguous than uncertain and not the same on purpose than concious) I would get out of that kind of emotional shadow boxing. Do you enjoy her company as it is? Meet her like the friend she is now. Do not chase what don´t seem enthusiasticaly welcome. Once removed for some time the dating appearances and her role of gatekeeper of your intents, she may react to the implicit in some more explicit way. Being it accepting the friendship with no further expectancies, asking for the next step or........dropping you cos you don´t play her game. I´m NOT advising you this as a tactics to get more (sex, affection, romantic commitment). No. Instead, it MAY lead to a more transparent situation. Whatever you do, do not become an orbiter. Best wishes. Edited May 23, 2022 by Uruktopi 2 Link to post Share on other sites
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