rainrhonda Posted April 29, 2022 Share Posted April 29, 2022 Saw my Ex for the 1st time in a year. That ended with an argument. We've since made ammends (long distance) via email, etc and there has been a small amount of flirting on both sides. So last weekend I saw him. At 1st he seemed to struggle making eye contact and looked down alot. But I was friendly and smiling so he seemed to relax after that. We were in a group of people, and I caught him staring at me once, we held a gaze for a few seconds and he smiled. We did alot of catching up and he listened carefully to everything I told him about my life. He laughed at my jokes. He sat down right beside me a couple times, I made a point not to touch him at all, I was afraid of rejection. He took me to the beach to talk. Didn't touch me at all, didn't try anything, we just talked and laughed. I had many chances to make a move but I was scared. He knows that I love him and want him back, so he knows I wouldn't reject him if he kissed me or anything. We both seemed quite happy to be together. I'm assuming he just doesn't want to hurt me or vice-versa. Thoughts? He used to hold my hand alot, etc without hesitation. There was none of that. But he seemed happy and said it was good to see me. Is he playing games or am I friend zoned, etc? Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted April 29, 2022 Share Posted April 29, 2022 It sounds like it was a pleasant catch up for him, but you've written nothing which would indicate that he wants to try again. Why did you break up? Has that situation now changed so that it's no longer a problem? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author rainrhonda Posted April 29, 2022 Author Share Posted April 29, 2022 14 minutes ago, basil67 said: It sounds like it was a pleasant catch up for him, but you've written nothing which would indicate that he wants to try again. Why did you break up? Has that situation now changed so that it's no longer a problem? 14 minutes ago, basil67 said: It sounds like it was a pleasant catch up for him, but you've written nothing which would indicate that he wants to try again. Why did you break up? Has that situation now changed so that it's no longer a problem? Written nothing? Not sure I understand what that means ... I loved seeing him ❤️ Which he knows. Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted April 29, 2022 Share Posted April 29, 2022 I think he is fine being friends and it was good to catch up, but is not interested in reconciling. 4 hours ago, rainrhonda said: Written nothing? Not sure I understand what that means And I would guess that it means there is nothing in your description of the night that indicates he still has romantic feelings for you. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted April 29, 2022 Share Posted April 29, 2022 8 hours ago, rainrhonda said: Written nothing? Not sure I understand what that means ... I loved seeing him ❤️ Which he knows. It means that nothing you described indicates he's interested in getting back together again. It sounds like he was having a nice catch-up but nothing more. Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted April 29, 2022 Share Posted April 29, 2022 You'll feel better when you leave the past in the past. There's no need to drag out the breakup by "staying friends". Delete and block him and all his people from ALL your social media and messaging apps. Get a good profile and pics on quality dating apps and start talking to local available men who want what you want. Link to post Share on other sites
Author rainrhonda Posted April 29, 2022 Author Share Posted April 29, 2022 Well I should've mentioned this before but forgot. A few months ago he wrote a song about me. He's a musician. Anyway he isn't aware I know about it. A mutual friend told me about it. It's a song that he's sorry I should have been the one, etc. It also described detailed things between us so it's not a question that it's about me. He is known for expressing his feelings thru music much more than other ways. And with our chatting last few months, he dropped a lot of sexual hints... so I just wonder if he changed his mind about that when he saw me or had reservations about it. I caught him staring at me multiple times but he never touched me in a romantic way so it's all just confusing. Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted April 29, 2022 Share Posted April 29, 2022 Short of him begging your forgiveness and asking for a second chance, I wouldn't read too much into your recent meet up. Has he asked to take you on a date or anything? Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted April 30, 2022 Share Posted April 30, 2022 If you guys have a long distance relationship was he just in town playing at a club and you ran into him? How far is the distance between you? I also agree that no matter what people tell you, how many songs he writes, smoke signals he sends up, until he actually asks to see you and says he wants you back just keep it moving and find someone else. It's always nice running into an ex and catching up as friends. Were you the one who broke up with him or vice versa? Link to post Share on other sites
ShyViolet Posted April 30, 2022 Share Posted April 30, 2022 If he wanted to be with you again, he would be. He would have made a move the last time you saw each other. But he did not. I'm not sure why you are torturing yourself by dragging this out, or what you hope to accomplish with all this. This is exactly why it's usually not recommended for exes to stay friends.... because one party tends to hold out false hope of getting the other back. And it prevents you from getting over the breakup and moving on with your life. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author rainrhonda Posted May 26, 2022 Author Share Posted May 26, 2022 Well he's visiting in my town (he has family here). We got together and he was kissing me very passionately , looking into my eyes, etc, more so than he's ever done before. We didn't discuss our feelings, though we did talk alot too. So Idk what he's feeling this all sordof came unexpectedly. But I'm happy at the moment. Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted May 27, 2022 Share Posted May 27, 2022 8 hours ago, rainrhonda said: Well he's visiting in my town If he has no plans to move there, it seems like he may be setting you up as the girl in the hometown port for drive-by hookups. If you want a local steady Involved BF, you'll need to distance yourself from this ex. Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted May 27, 2022 Share Posted May 27, 2022 11 hours ago, rainrhonda said: Well he's visiting in my town (he has family here). We got together and he was kissing me very passionately , looking into my eyes, etc, more so than he's ever done before. We didn't discuss our feelings, though we did talk alot too. So Idk what he's feeling this all sordof came unexpectedly. But I'm happy at the moment. Why didn't you ask him "what are you doing and what do you want from me?" If he said, "I want to rekindle what we had" then agree and let him kiss you; but if his response is "I love seeing you and just feel like kissing you", then maybe it wouldn't be a good idea because it's giving you hope that he wants you back and that may not be the case at all. Did he break up with you or were you the one who called for the break? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
glows Posted May 27, 2022 Share Posted May 27, 2022 12 hours ago, rainrhonda said: Well he's visiting in my town (he has family here). We got together and he was kissing me very passionately , looking into my eyes, etc, more so than he's ever done before. We didn't discuss our feelings, though we did talk alot too. So Idk what he's feeling this all sordof came unexpectedly. But I'm happy at the moment. Respectfully, if you both have history a person who cares deeply about you or wants to rekindle anything would mention that before letting things get carried away like this. You hadn't answered the earlier question about why you broke up or what that argument that led to the break up was about. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts