Alaska01 Posted May 11, 2022 Share Posted May 11, 2022 So me and my boyfriend of two years broke up two months ago and he basically already has a new girlfriend and I’m still not eating and I’m always crying. I have no support system. I’m reading the breakup bible and it’s telling me I need a support system and when I reached out to people they belittled me and made this breakup even harder. I don’t know why was it so easy for him to get closure and move on and I have to start over with everything . Link to post Share on other sites
Happy Lemming Posted May 11, 2022 Share Posted May 11, 2022 Can you elaborate about the breakup?? Were there some issues/problems?? Perhaps you ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend doesn't have these issues or problems, and he is much happier with this new woman. Friends will only be sympathetic towards your breakup for so long, then they get tired of hearing about it. That doesn't give them a pass to belittle you, but they probably have had their fill of listening to it. Link to post Share on other sites
glows Posted May 11, 2022 Share Posted May 11, 2022 23 minutes ago, Alaska01 said: So me and my boyfriend of two years broke up two months ago and he basically already has a new girlfriend and I’m still not eating and I’m always crying. I have no support system. I’m reading the breakup bible and it’s telling me I need a support system and when I reached out to people they belittled me and made this breakup even harder. I don’t know why was it so easy for him to get closure and move on and I have to start over with everything . What are you starting over with? Avoid having him available on social media or checking up on his life. None of that is any of your business, actively make it none of your business. Give yourself a chance to move on. It doesn't just happen. You'll have to put in the work and create better boundaries when it comes to moving forward. Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted May 11, 2022 Share Posted May 11, 2022 21 minutes ago, Alaska01 said: I’m still not eating and I’m always crying. I have no support system. Sorry this happened. What was the breakup about? How old is he? Did you live together? Talk to trusted friends and family but not too much. Breakups hurt and it takes time so give yourself a break. Also delete and block him and all his people from all your messaging apps and don't keep tabs on him. See a physician for an evaluation of your physical and mental health. Mention the chronic crying and difficulty eating. Ask for a referral the a qualified therapist for ongoing support. While breakups hurt, it's important to address protracted physical symptoms. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted May 11, 2022 Share Posted May 11, 2022 1 hour ago, Alaska01 said: So me and my boyfriend of two years broke up two months ago and he basically already has a new girlfriend and I’m still not eating and I’m always crying. I have no support system. I’m reading the breakup bible and it’s telling me I need a support system and when I reached out to people they belittled me and made this breakup even harder. I don’t know why was it so easy for him to get closure and move on and I have to start over with everything . Did you break up with him or did he break up with you? Do you have family nearby for support? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Alaska01 Posted May 11, 2022 Author Share Posted May 11, 2022 Just now, stillafool said: Did you break up with him or did he break up with you? Do you have family nearby for support? I broke up with him but it’s Bc I felt he deserved better but I was wrong it was Bc I was sexually assaulted as a kid and I couldn’t tell him and I felt I couldn’t please him. As for the family part they live here and I’ve reached out and they pretty much just say it’s life move on or i told you so. Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted May 11, 2022 Share Posted May 11, 2022 21 minutes ago, Alaska01 said: I was sexually assaulted as a kid and I couldn’t tell him and I felt I couldn’t please him. Sorry this happened. Never feel pressured into sex or as if you have to "please" anyone sexually. First take care of this issue through empathetic and understanding therapy. There's no reason to feel so alone . With help you can encapsulate this and place it somewhere where you can heal and move forward in life. If family are a source of pain talk to understanding friends. Definitely see a physician to rule out depression, anxiety, PTSD, etc. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Alaska01 Posted May 11, 2022 Author Share Posted May 11, 2022 1 hour ago, Wiseman2 said: Sorry this happened. What was the breakup about? How old is he? Did you live together? Talk to trusted friends and family but not too much. Breakups hurt and it takes time so give yourself a break. Also delete and block him and all his people from all your messaging apps and don't keep tabs on him. See a physician for an evaluation of your physical and mental health. Mention the chronic crying and difficulty eating. Ask for a referral the a qualified therapist for ongoing support. While breakups hurt, it's important to address protracted physical symptoms. Honestly don’t even know what the breakup was about he doesn’t care to speak on it so I guess I’ll have questions with no answers. He is 22 and I’m 20 and we did live together. i have my therapy appointment today !!! 2 Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted May 11, 2022 Share Posted May 11, 2022 How long did you live together? Did you put him out or did he leave willingly? You said you were the one to break up with him and then you said you don't even remember what the argument was about. Was this a pattern in your relationship where you guys broke up often and went back? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Alaska01 Posted May 11, 2022 Author Share Posted May 11, 2022 4 minutes ago, stillafool said: How long did you live together? Did you put him out or did he leave willingly? You said you were the one to break up with him and then you said you don't even remember what the argument was about. Was this a pattern in your relationship where you guys broke up often and went back? I left willingly. I don’t know if you read my earlier repones but our communication lacked but we could have worked that out but I felt he deserved better than me. We never heard really broke up we would just take space and talk. He’s moved on and y’all are right she might have what I don’t have but I still gave it my best. We lived together for a a little over a year close to two years. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Alaska01 Posted May 11, 2022 Author Share Posted May 11, 2022 5 hours ago, Wiseman2 said: Sorry this happened. Never feel pressured into sex or as if you have to "please" anyone sexually. First take care of this issue through empathetic and understanding therapy. There's no reason to feel so alone . With help you can encapsulate this and place it somewhere where you can heal and move forward in life. If family are a source of pain talk to understanding friends. Definitely see a physician to rule out depression, anxiety, PTSD, etc. Thank you . I am definitely working on me now finding peace and healing or mending what’s broken. 1 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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