Pix Posted June 22, 2022 Share Posted June 22, 2022 So I met this guy in an online community and he talked to me me and I felt like I knew him from somewhere, I guess he reminded me of someone I care about and so I instantly liked him and formed a connection in my mind. After a couple of months, I realized he talks that way to all the new girls in that community. His relation towards me in the last couple of years went from giving me a lot of attention to ignoring me most of the time. I like that place and don't want to permanently leave, but I also don't seem to be strong enough to leave whatever happened with this guy behind. What should I do? How do I get over him without leaving, or is leaving the only option for me to move on and heal? Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted June 22, 2022 Share Posted June 22, 2022 (edited) 11 minutes ago, Pix said: How do I get over him without leaving, or is leaving the only option for me to move on and heal? Enjoy your community and ignore him. What kind of online community is it? Block him. Date in real life. Get a good profile and pics on quality dating apps and start talking to and meeting local, single, real-life men. Edited June 22, 2022 by Wiseman2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Pix Posted June 22, 2022 Author Share Posted June 22, 2022 (edited) 13 minutes ago, Wiseman2 said: Enjoy your community and ignore him. What kind of online community is it? Block him. Date in real life. Get a good profile and pics on quality dating apps and start talking to and meeting local, single, real-life men. Sounds reasonable. I did try going out with other guys but I still catch myself getting sad when running into his posts. He's not the first womanizer (or whatever is the term) I met, but for some reason I'm struggling to let go. It's not a big community btw. I could block him, but the thought of it also makes me sad. Edited June 22, 2022 by Pix Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted June 22, 2022 Share Posted June 22, 2022 Until you block him, put him on ignore, or leave the community you will stay stuck. You can't get over him reading what he says to other women and wishing it were you. He sounds like an online Casonova. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Pix Posted June 22, 2022 Author Share Posted June 22, 2022 3 minutes ago, stillafool said: Until you block him, put him on ignore, or leave the community you will stay stuck. You can't get over him reading what he says to other women and wishing it were you. He sounds like an online Casonova. Yeah, I just spent half a night reading his conversation with other woman and suffering, and it's not the first time. I also think he has a personality type I haven't met before, because, like I said, I've met womanizers before, and I am relatively immune to them. Anyways, I'll try the ignore option first, and if it doesn't work I'll leave or make a longer break. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Pix Posted June 22, 2022 Author Share Posted June 22, 2022 Thank you both for the answers. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
NuevoYorko Posted June 22, 2022 Share Posted June 22, 2022 I'm confused. You liked him, and after "a couple of months" you realized what he's all about. Fast forward 2 years. Now you are wondering how to handle the fact that he doesn't treat you in a special way. Hasn't this been the status quo for two whole years? You've been there for a long time, you like it, so clearly you have some connections in that group that are positive for you. Keep hanging out and engaging with those people and let this guy be on the periphery, like he has already been for a long time now. Of course you can block him, and absolutely don't pay any attention to whatever he's doing with others in the group. It has nothing to do with you. He's not in your life and hasn't really ever been. Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted June 22, 2022 Share Posted June 22, 2022 7 minutes ago, Pix said: I also think he has a personality type I haven't met before, This is also what hooks the other women too. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Pix Posted June 22, 2022 Author Share Posted June 22, 2022 5 minutes ago, NuevoYorko said: I'm confused. You liked him, and after "a couple of months" you realized what he's all about. Fast forward 2 years. Now you are wondering how to handle the fact that he doesn't treat you in a special way. Hasn't this been the status quo for two whole years? You've been there for a long time, you like it, so clearly you have some connections in that group that are positive for you. Keep hanging out and engaging with those people and let this guy be on the periphery, like he has already been for a long time now. Of course you can block him, and absolutely don't pay any attention to whatever he's doing with others in the group. It has nothing to do with you. He's not in your life and hasn't really ever been. If he didn't treat me in a special way from the beginning, I guess I'd be fine. It's the switch to ignore mode that hurt the most. And yeah, if there weren't other people I liked and respected there, I'd leave long time ago. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Pix Posted June 22, 2022 Author Share Posted June 22, 2022 14 minutes ago, stillafool said: This is also what hooks the other women too. Possible, I am not the only one who likes him I think. At least I'll know when I meet someone like him again. Link to post Share on other sites
ShyViolet Posted June 23, 2022 Share Posted June 23, 2022 This is someone you never met in person? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Pix Posted June 23, 2022 Author Share Posted June 23, 2022 34 minutes ago, ShyViolet said: This is someone you never met in person? Yeah. But it's a local forum, and I did meet some people there in person. Link to post Share on other sites
ShyViolet Posted June 23, 2022 Share Posted June 23, 2022 3 hours ago, Pix said: Yeah. But it's a local forum, and I did meet some people there in person. You've allowed yourself to get way too invested in a stranger on the internet who you never actually met. Don't lose touch with the fact that you didn't have an actual connection with this guy. You built up an idea of him in your head. Get out there and go on some dates in person. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Alpacalia Posted June 23, 2022 Share Posted June 23, 2022 Sounds more like a flirt. Womanizers engage in casual sexual affairs with many women. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Pix Posted June 23, 2022 Author Share Posted June 23, 2022 3 hours ago, ShyViolet said: You've allowed yourself to get way too invested in a stranger on the internet who you never actually met. Don't lose touch with the fact that you didn't have an actual connection with this guy. You built up an idea of him in your head. Get out there and go on some dates in person. I did build up an idea of him in my head..But I don't think it was because it was on the internet, the same could have happened in person. If I met him in some bar or cafe, maybe we would have talked about some casual topics, and online I had the chance to read some of his deeper thoughts that people usually don't share in person (unless it's with people they know well and for a long time). Maybe that's why I have the feeling like I know him (I realize I don't). Link to post Share on other sites
Author Pix Posted June 23, 2022 Author Share Posted June 23, 2022 3 hours ago, Alpacalia said: Sounds more like a flirt. Womanizers engage in casual sexual affairs with many women. Maybe flirt's more appropriate word, I don't think he engages in sexual activities with women he meets there, I also don't know if most of his conversations with women end up like it did with me. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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