Gaeta Posted July 1, 2022 Share Posted July 1, 2022 8 hours ago, Ladybug1989 said: I really dont know, i guess time will tell. I just hope i dont end up having my heart broke again because ive been throught it too many times before. Ladybug...Ladybug... You don't want your heart broken again but you pick to date a broken man. Why so many women do this! He's depressed, full of debts, child support on top of that, self medicates with pot. There is no pot of gold for you at the end of that trail. The saying is at the end of the rainbow but there is no rainbow here. You had 2 good months. It's typical of people emotionally unavailable. They're excited at first then the newness goes away. I'm sorry, if you were my daughter l'd want much more for you. 5 2 Link to post Share on other sites
poppyfields Posted July 1, 2022 Share Posted July 1, 2022 (edited) 23 minutes ago, Gaeta said: You had 2 good months. It's typical of people emotionally unavailable. Ladybug, perhaps YOU are emotionally unavailable yourself, passively. You are not actively unavailable like your boyfriend is, but think about it, why would YOU be hanging around this for nearly a year if what you wanted was commitment and a man who loved you? Emotionally available women do NOT stick with unavailable men who don't love them. They just don't. They leave and search for a man who IS emotionally available and who is capable and desirous of loving them. It seems like a pattern since you posted this is sadly familiar to you. I would start looking within. Determine why you attract these types of men and why you choose to stick around once it becomes clear how unavailable and/or damaged they are. Edited July 1, 2022 by poppyfields 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Ami1uwant Posted July 1, 2022 Share Posted July 1, 2022 5 hours ago, stillafool said: Most people don't move in with each other until they know they're in love because it's too difficult to split up if you never do fall in love. Time consuming and expensive. People view love differently as in I love you mean I want to marry you Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted July 1, 2022 Share Posted July 1, 2022 None of this sounds promising, OP. He's giving you plenty of reason to believe this probably won't go further. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted July 1, 2022 Share Posted July 1, 2022 When you are not getting what you expect out of the relationship...that means it's time to go. You will only be punishing yourself if you stay. Gaeta is right, this guy has way too much instability to give you what you need. ...you keep trying to rescue these guys...you need to cut your losses quicker. Let go of the anchor before it hits the bottom. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
girafficshark Posted July 1, 2022 Share Posted July 1, 2022 I know it hurts to see someone you love going through some tough times, especially when they tell you they are depressed. You don't want to leave them because you don't want them to feel alone or like another person has left them. I went through this with my previous relationship for two years. He never could tell me he loved me and always had a reason why. The fact of the matter was that he just didn't love me, he loved the power he had over me. He would always tell me how broken he was and how everyone always gives up on him. It made me try with every single ounce of love and care I had to be there for him and do everything I could for him. I put him before everything. In the long run, it ended up hurting me so much more than any of it was worth. I had so many people telling me to get out of the situation, block him, that he wasn't worth it, but when you're in love with someone, it is hard to hear and hard to listen to any of it because you feel like you know that person so much more than everyone else. I was stuck on this man for a couple years after we broke up because I never understood why he didn't love me, or if there was anything I could have done different. Now, I am in a relationship with the person of my dreams who treats me better than I ever have been treated. I know what healthy love feels like and it has made me realize how horrible that relationship was and that it wasn't me, it was him. I did everything in my power to try to "fix" him or make him love me, but he was never going to. I will always have love for him and remember our time together, but I am glad I didn't stay. I don't know you or him or what you two have been through together, but I promise you, whatever you decide, it will hurt. It will hurt to walk away, it will hurt to stay and continue to wait. One day, someone will find you and show you how beautiful love can be. You deserve a healthy love. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
BaileyB Posted July 1, 2022 Share Posted July 1, 2022 12 hours ago, Gaeta said: Ladybug...Ladybug... You don't want your heart broken again but you pick to date a broken man. Why so many women do this! He's depressed, full of debts, child support on top of that, self medicates with pot. There is no pot of gold for you at the end of that trail. Exactly what I was going to say. This is not a man that I would date. If you must, take a break and give him some time to get himself sorted. He doesn’t sound like he is a healthy relationship partner for you. Too much baggage here, I’m afraid. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Ladybug1989 Posted January 7, 2023 Author Share Posted January 7, 2023 Been a while: thought id give an update. Were still together. Hes taking me away on holiday. Things are looking good. Lots of plans for the future. And guess what .. hes told me he loves me 💜 wahoooo haha! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
CaliforniaGirl Posted January 9, 2023 Share Posted January 9, 2023 On 1/7/2023 at 3:51 PM, Ladybug1989 said: Been a while: thought id give an update. Were still together. Hes taking me away on holiday. Things are looking good. Lots of plans for the future. And guess what .. hes told me he loves me 💜 wahoooo haha! Wow, that's wonderful! Link to post Share on other sites
JTSW Posted January 9, 2023 Share Posted January 9, 2023 On 1/7/2023 at 11:51 PM, Ladybug1989 said: Been a while: thought id give an update. Were still together. Hes taking me away on holiday. Things are looking good. Lots of plans for the future. And guess what .. hes told me he loves me 💜 wahoooo haha! But does he really? Or is he just telling you what you want to hear? What's changed exactly? Has he made any changes to his lifestyle? Who is paying for this holiday? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Ladybug1989 Posted January 9, 2023 Author Share Posted January 9, 2023 18 minutes ago, JTSW said: But does he really? Or is he just telling you what you want to hear? What's changed exactly? Has he made any changes to his lifestyle? Who is paying for this holiday? He is, hes taking me away. i guess time... its been several months now. Weve had alot more time together and got closer. Yes alot has changed lifestyle wise. Hes got out of debt. Hes passed his driving test. Got a car. Much happier in him self and i guess now emotionally available. Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted January 9, 2023 Share Posted January 9, 2023 Well good for you and glad everything worked out and you're happy now. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
JTSW Posted January 9, 2023 Share Posted January 9, 2023 9 minutes ago, Ladybug1989 said: He is, hes taking me away. i guess time... its been several months now. Weve had alot more time together and got closer. Yes alot has changed lifestyle wise. Hes got out of debt. Hes passed his driving test. Got a car. Much happier in him self and i guess now emotionally available. Then I'm pleased for you OP. Hope you both have a long and wonderful future together 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts