Ms.Jazzy Posted July 1, 2022 Share Posted July 1, 2022 For about 2 months at my job I've met this new coworker at my job who is very mysterious in a way. He's very anti social with everyone there. He appears distant and no one really knows anything about him which is a red flag for me because I feel like he's hiding something about his life. When talking to him his responses are very basic and short. I've noticed that he pays more attention to me than anyone else there. He's always around me and helping me with whatever I need, and I can tell he's at least attracted to me and that's how I started liking him because I thought it was cute.We can't seem to get a conversation going, It's always basically a hey how are you or something work related with small talk and he always seem to avoid deep conversations by walking away which is rude.To be honest I don't really understand why I like him, he's attractive but he lacks a personality.I always catch him staring at me even at a distance and sometimes it's sort of creepy because I'll see him checking me out at the most random times. There was a time I was clocking in for work and I just happened to look in an area far off and there he was by himself in a corner staring at me and even when I caught him, he just stood there staring in me in this trance like state and just kept looking at me as I was walking to my destination. Then I'm also not sure if he's involved with someone already. There was a day we were all leaving work and I saw him walk to another area to talk to this female I've never seen before. Like usual he made small talk with her and they were walking out to the parking lot together walking side by side and barely speaking to one another. I kind of sped up and walked in front of him to see what his response would be and he literally left the girl to speak to me and ask if I was ok. I told him I was fine and he went back to walking with the mysterious girl to his car. That was the only time I've seen him with her and from then on I've only seen him by himself so I have no clue who she was. Overall I can't figure him out or know what to do. All he does is stare at me and trying to start a conversation with him is like pulling teeth. Should I just leave him alone altogether? Is he even into me? Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted July 1, 2022 Share Posted July 1, 2022 The most obvious way to tell if a guy is into you is when he asks for your number or asks you out. If he likes you in a romantic way it doesn't make sense that he would walk away when you try to carry a conversation with him. If you're allowed to date co workers just give him your phone number and see if he calls you. Link to post Share on other sites
glows Posted July 1, 2022 Share Posted July 1, 2022 26 minutes ago, Ms.Jazzy said: For about 2 months at my job I've met this new coworker at my job who is very mysterious in a way. He's very anti social with everyone there. He appears distant and no one really knows anything about him which is a red flag for me because I feel like he's hiding something about his life. When talking to him his responses are very basic and short. I've noticed that he pays more attention to me than anyone else there. He's always around me and helping me with whatever I need, and I can tell he's at least attracted to me and that's how I started liking him because I thought it was cute.We can't seem to get a conversation going, It's always basically a hey how are you or something work related with small talk and he always seem to avoid deep conversations by walking away which is rude.To be honest I don't really understand why I like him, he's attractive but he lacks a personality.I always catch him staring at me even at a distance and sometimes it's sort of creepy because I'll see him checking me out at the most random times. There was a time I was clocking in for work and I just happened to look in an area far off and there he was by himself in a corner staring at me and even when I caught him, he just stood there staring in me in this trance like state and just kept looking at me as I was walking to my destination. Then I'm also not sure if he's involved with someone already. There was a day we were all leaving work and I saw him walk to another area to talk to this female I've never seen before. Like usual he made small talk with her and they were walking out to the parking lot together walking side by side and barely speaking to one another. I kind of sped up and walked in front of him to see what his response would be and he literally left the girl to speak to me and ask if I was ok. I told him I was fine and he went back to walking with the mysterious girl to his car. That was the only time I've seen him with her and from then on I've only seen him by himself so I have no clue who she was. Overall I can't figure him out or know what to do. All he does is stare at me and trying to start a conversation with him is like pulling teeth. Should I just leave him alone altogether? Is he even into me? He doesn’t sound interested at all. How do you expect to know this guy if he doesn’t want to converse with you? Do you like working at this place? Think about your career. Maybe it’s time to move on. Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted July 1, 2022 Share Posted July 1, 2022 1 hour ago, Ms.Jazzy said: For about 2 months at my job I've met this new coworker at my job who is very mysterious in a way. It's always basically a hey how are you or something work related with small talk and he always seem to avoid deep conversations by walking away which is rude. He just started there so he's being appropriate avoiding deep conversations and being polite and professional. He may be a private person and may not want messy office romances or dating coworkers. Just respond in kind by keeping things professional and work related. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
NuevoYorko Posted July 1, 2022 Share Posted July 1, 2022 This is a very common type of post and frankly, they all baffle me. He barely talks to you. So he talks to you "more" than he does to other people or you have seen him looking at you. Okay. It means not a thing unless the two of you actually connect and that moves in a forward direction. That will require more than him saying a few words here and there and looking at you from a corner. Of course you could always ask him out, make moves on him, etc. If you choose to do that, even if he goes along with it, make sure you'll be contented. It can be a lonely feeling making all the moves on a person who has given you little reason to think they were interested in the first place. That said, some people are just passive or so socially awkward that they can't and will not make any first moves. Would you like to date a man like that though? 3 Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted July 2, 2022 Share Posted July 2, 2022 18 hours ago, Ms.Jazzy said: He's very anti social with everyone there. He appears distant and no one really knows anything about him which is a red flag for me because I feel like he's hiding something about his life. Or he just prefers to keep his professional and personal lives separate. Plenty of people do, myself included. 18 hours ago, Ms.Jazzy said: Should I just leave him alone altogether? Yes. He doesn't appear to be interested. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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