When you find out your ex was trying to get back together while he was already dating someone else

[Uptown182]

So things finally ended with my ex a year ago. However yesterday I found out that the last time he saw he me and came to my house telling me he still loved me and begging me to get back together with him, he had already been dating another woman for 4-5 months! I of course had no idea at the time, although looking back on it certain things make perfect sense now. I cut things off him with after that last time we saw each other because he was acting hot and cold with me. Anyway, he’s now engaged to that same same woman, and I wonder if she knew that for those first 5 months he would reach out to me and try to see me. As for my history with him, we were in a relationship for about a year, then on and off for another year and a half, he met her during that last half year.  

I am over this guy, but of course finding something like this out brings up mixed feelings. I just never thought he was the kind of guy who would cheat but I guess he is. And Of course finding out they’re engaged now makes me feel like why wasn’t I good enough. I’ll admit our main reason for breaking up was I want kids and he didn’t (he already has children), the woman he’s with already has children as well so I’m guessing she doesn’t want anymore either. Just a vent, so thanks for reading

 

[Wiseman2]

15 minutes ago, Uptown182 said:

he’s now engaged to that same same woman, and I wonder if she knew that for those first 5 months he would reach out to me and try to see me.
I’ll admit our main reason for breaking up was I want kids and he didn’t he already has children

Sorry this happened. You were right to break up. You need to delete and block him and ALL his people from ALL your  social media and messaging apps. You dodged a bullet, so don't look back.

[Uptown182]

4 minutes ago, Wiseman2 said:

Sorry this happened. You were right to break up. You need to delete and block him and ALL his people from ALL your  social media and messaging apps. You dodged a bullet, so don't look back.

Yes, he’s already been blocked for a year.  I found this out from a friend of a friend that I barely talk to, so that person isn’t really in my life either.  Just wasn’t pleasant to hear, but I’m in now way missing him or wanting him back.  Just have that feeling of not being good enough which I know see down is not true.  

[assertives]

Kids are a deal-breaker, you either want them or you don't, and if you guys were on and off circling around this same issue each time, I would say it's definitely for the better that things did not work out with him. I wouldn't look at it as you aren't good enough, more like your life goals are not compatible. Perhaps he's found someone who wants the same things in life as him and you will find someone who wants the same things as you some day too.