mario_C Posted August 2, 2022 Share Posted August 2, 2022 Hi, if this doesn't go here, well...take it where it should be. My entire life has been a failure. I keep trying to tell myself things will get better and I have to keep trying, even though I know that's bull (I'm 53 so...if things were going to turn around, they would have by now). And I don't know what to do. I just want to crawl into a hole these days... Link to post Share on other sites
BrinnM Posted August 2, 2022 Share Posted August 2, 2022 What’s wrong with your life, and since when have you been feeling this way? Link to post Share on other sites
Happy Lemming Posted August 2, 2022 Share Posted August 2, 2022 Do you have a roof over your head?? Did you have a hot meal tonight?? Do you have clothes on your back?? Clean water to drink?? Appropriate medical care?? If you answered "yes" to the above questions, you are doing pretty good and are far from a failure. Can you elaborate as to what you didn't accomplish in your life?? Was there an achievable goal that you didn't complete?? What "things" need to be better for you to not consider your life a "failure"?? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted August 2, 2022 Share Posted August 2, 2022 7 hours ago, mario_C said: . I keep trying to tell myself things will get better and I have to keep trying, even though I know that's bull I'm 53 so...if things were going to turn around, they would have by now. Unfortunately my advice is the same as the last time you posted this. See a physician for an evaluation of your physical and mental health. Get some tests done. Rule out physical causes. Ask for a referral to a qualified therapist for ongoing support. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author mario_C Posted August 2, 2022 Author Share Posted August 2, 2022 5 hours ago, Wiseman2 said: Unfortunately my advice is the same as the last time you posted this. See a physician for an evaluation of your physical and mental health. Get some tests done. Rule out physical causes. Ask for a referral to a qualified therapist for ongoing support. A doctor said that, too. I don't like the idea of spending the rest of my life on antidepressants (and going apesh the moment I run out), but that's how life is I guess. Link to post Share on other sites
Author mario_C Posted August 2, 2022 Author Share Posted August 2, 2022 12 hours ago, BrinnM said: What’s wrong with your life, and since when have you been feeling this way? Hello, Brinn. Dead end job, light caregiving for an elderly relative I have issues with, no friends or career prospects. I'm taking classes soon, even though I've already graduated from college twice and it didn't help - third time's the charm? Basically I'm way too old to be this lost and this unsure about who I am and what I need to be doing with my life. Link to post Share on other sites
ItsTheDay Posted August 2, 2022 Share Posted August 2, 2022 1 hour ago, mario_C said: Hello, Brinn. Dead end job, light caregiving for an elderly relative I have issues with, no friends or career prospects. I'm taking classes soon, even though I've already graduated from college twice and it didn't help - third time's the charm? Basically I'm way too old to be this lost and this unsure about who I am and what I need to be doing with my life. I can somewhat relate, minus the taking care of someone else. I didn't go to college, went right into working fulltime. I at times feel like I'm also at a dead end job, but my employer ensured me they have a plan for me. I'm in my 40's and often find myself laying in bed, staring at the ceiling question my life and where it's heading. I used to be outgoing, social and always had to be doing something. Now I'm pretty much a loner and live a hermit life but I'm trying to keep a positive mindset about it. It's giving me time to focus on myself. I've had a very good group of friends, a few of them picked the marriage with kids road (I don't want kids), one of my good friends (my wing man) went crazy and did some time in a Psychiatric hospital and some turned into pot heads, not for me. My ex was my bestfriend, never thought I'd be without her but as life showed me bestfriends don't last forever. You're born in the world by yourself and you will leave by yourself. In the end, you only have yourself. I have my moments, not going to lie but ever since I've been single and pretty much friendless, I've been feeling stronger than I ever have. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Weezy1973 Posted August 2, 2022 Share Posted August 2, 2022 3 hours ago, mario_C said: Basically I'm way too old to be this lost and this unsure about who I am and what I need to be doing with my life. I suspect a lot of this is fear based. Fear or failure, fear of rejection etc. Fear keeps us stuck. We aren’t willing to take the risks associated with choosing a career, or dating etc. But that inevitably leads us towards getting stuck. In the moment, not doing anything, or even actively avoiding situations that might spark those fears or anxieties keeps us calm, but in the long term that lack of action becomes troublesome because you feel like you haven’t gotten anywhere. What worked for me at the start was eating healthy, regular exercise, and making sure I got a solid sleep every night. The extra energy I got made it easier to do new things and take more risks. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Els Posted August 2, 2022 Share Posted August 2, 2022 16 hours ago, Happy Lemming said: Do you have a roof over your head?? Did you have a hot meal tonight?? Do you have clothes on your back?? Clean water to drink?? Appropriate medical care?? If you answered "yes" to the above questions, you are doing pretty good and are far from a failure. FWIW, lots of people on this planet who aren't "failures" don't have some of the above items either, due to sheer luck of the draw as to where they were born. So yeah, I guess I'd go with "you're pretty lucky". 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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