lolita888 Posted February 15, 2019 Share Posted February 15, 2019 I'm still hurting. It's still so painful. I wish I can just find a new love. I wish I can fall in love again and forget you and move on from you completely. It's so painful especially with this Valentine's day. I am so full of jealous thought: Where are you? What are you doing? Are you with her? Are you on date right now and having lovely time? Are you home and just enjoying each other's company? Are you making love with her right now? It's really painful. I still can't believe you lied to me like that. Destroyed my dream and wish for this year.The year that I am looking forward to, you destroyed it. Link to post Share on other sites
GeorgiaPeach1 Posted February 16, 2019 Share Posted February 16, 2019 Even though we broke up, I still had a little hope that you'd show up on Valentine's Day since we had prior plans to spend it together. Of course you didn't show and, at the end of the day, that was to be expected and for the best. My rose colored glasses are starting to come off and I'm seeing the real you that I didn't want to see when we were together. I'm seeing how you bounce around from person to person, leaving a long trail of confusion and wasted time. You have no intention of settling down, and your refusal to accept imperfection in others (while being so flawed yourself) shows this. There were so many little and not so little things I let slide that I'm a bit embarrassed now. Thank goodness we are on opposite sides of town, have totally different schedules and have no real connection to each other's people. The sad part is that when you get older, there will be a woman somewhere who will ignore how you've treated other women your whole life and she will take you in and give you care and benefits. That's a big reason men like you can continue to play your games indefinitely. It's one thing to deal with a breakup, but realizing the person you fell for never existed takes the sadness up to a whole different level. I can't get back what I never had. Sooner or later the longing and the sense of loss I wake up with a lot of days will leave for good. Link to post Share on other sites
GeorgiaPeach1 Posted February 17, 2019 Share Posted February 17, 2019 I'm so very sad, but now I'm getting angry too. I never want to see or talk to you again! You're an a**hole! Link to post Share on other sites
GeorgiaPeach1 Posted February 19, 2019 Share Posted February 19, 2019 I got some good news today, but of course I can't share it with you. I admit, my emotions are all over the place. Now that the fog is clearing, I'm seeing that you're not exactly the great catch I thought you were. And I realize some mistakes I made. The difference is that I was willing to work through these things with you because they were relatively minor compared to some other people's issues. Your philosophy is if it's not perfect and takes a little work, toss and keep going like you're taking out the trash. Well newsflash, there is no perfect woman or man. There will be days where one of you is not your best. But go ahead and keep searching for Ms. Perfect. Keep being oblivious to your own shortcomings. Link to post Share on other sites
GeorgiaPeach1 Posted February 21, 2019 Share Posted February 21, 2019 I feel like I'm the only one posting in this thread these days, but if it's helping me until I can stand on my own two feet emotionally, then great! I'm now at three weeks no contact. For the first time, instead of wondering why you didn't see me as worth it, I'm questioning whether you are worth it. And I don't think you are. I'll probably go back and forth on this during my healing process, but this is a breakthrough. If I had a daughter, I would never recommend she place herself in a relationship with someone like you. You aren't a bad guy, but you have few relationship skills. Even if you were to try to come back now, I could never trust you as a life partner or even as a friend. You're completely unreliable for an extended emotional connection and commitment. Link to post Share on other sites
flume Posted February 22, 2019 Share Posted February 22, 2019 (edited) You bitch.. Your call left me seething with anger. I can feel the anger coursing through my veins.. You say you called me by mistake and then on my message you drop a bomb.. You ****ing ingrate.. What the **** do you want.. I was deleting you.. You deleted me much before.. And then the lie.. **** you.. I want to call you up and shout my heart out on you. **** you.. I am writhing in pain because of you.. Are you happy now you immature selfish bitch.. Who calls an ex to tell them they are dating someone.. Have you no empathy.. You want a rise out of me. You are not getting one.. You will never get one.. Cause I am done with you.. Edited February 22, 2019 by flume Link to post Share on other sites
opti_mystic Posted February 23, 2019 Share Posted February 23, 2019 It's been almost two months since we've talked. I finally worked up the courage to delete our text thread on my phone tonight.. our best conversations were gone long before that.. but now I have almost erased you completely.. almost. I'm not quite ready to do it at full capacity yet. My memory wouldn't allow for that, anyway. But.. I'm getting through this. I missed you today.. but then I remembered some random yet valid reasons of why you're not good for me, and why we're just not good for each other. It's going to be a long wave of progress and regress, but I'm going to see it through. I have to get over you one day.. but a part of me hopes you'll never fully get over me. Link to post Share on other sites
flume Posted February 23, 2019 Share Posted February 23, 2019 Hey bitch.. How you doing.. Went out with a friend. The kind I avoided when we were together.. Approached a woman.. She said no to having drinks.. But it was a pretty good night . We introduced ourselves to a couple of other women who though were not into us were still friendly.. Had a good time Hope you are having the same with your new man.. Oh and yeah I am the catch on the 2 of us.. So **** you and everything associated with you Link to post Share on other sites
MeadowFlower Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 Goodbye forever D_ _ _ d. Link to post Share on other sites
GeorgiaPeach1 Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 I've been feeling awful lately, and I broke down crying today. The aching in my chest is so painful, especially when I wake up and remember what's happened. I'm finally getting rid of hope. You're not coming back and if you did, the same problems would be right there. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. I don't need a third ticket to the circus show. So many things I'm realizing now about your behavior and true nature, and I can't even let you know because then I'd look crazy. So I have to take the L and accept that I wasn't looking out for my own best interest. Lesson learned. Link to post Share on other sites
David33 Posted February 25, 2019 Share Posted February 25, 2019 23 years of marriage, the last 10 should have never happened. Back then I felt alone and I used to ask myself, "Who is going to tell me it's okay to leave my spouse who has a mental illness?" The answer was always, nobody. One year ago I finally decided on my own and 2 months ago you moved out. Now I'm reliving that pain I experienced 10 years ago all over again. I don't hate you, I hate that your condition and my decisions has lead us to the point where I have a lifetime of memories, a lifetime of spousal support (I do hate you California) and a few days of sadness. I know the pain will pass. But right now, I hate how it feels. Link to post Share on other sites
flume Posted February 26, 2019 Share Posted February 26, 2019 Hey.. So last night as I went to bed, I was begging you to come back.. I am sure I will get over this begging phase but really I am tired of trawling the net looking for reconciliation stories.. I also had something come up in my mind.. If you don't wanna be with me how can I ask you to come back.. If there is not love what would be the point.. I don't understand your last call.. Why you stabbed me in tge heart.. Were you looking for a rise out of me. Things are well just going on. I I oscillate thinking you might come back to thinking you wouldn't to thinking I dont want you back.. Part of me believes if I do a grand gesture you might come back but the problem is I can't.. Because they've never worked and would feel like ripping open old wounds.. I don't know when I will stop thinking about you.. Oh and by the way I am a little apprehensive crossing yiur part of town.. Don't want to run into you. The other day I had to cover my face.. Well thats it for today.. I am not sure I miss you anymore but yes you're on my mind a lot.. Link to post Share on other sites
GeorgiaPeach1 Posted February 28, 2019 Share Posted February 28, 2019 You're a scumbag. What kind of man goes through life wanting everything his way or the highway, regardless of the needs and feelings of the other person? What stops me right in my tracks from contacting you when I miss the good times is that I distinctly remember the sighs and eyerolls you gave when you voluntarily discussed your exes and how you didn't miss ANY of them. How you despised running into them. How you had been careless about their wants and needs. I was so foolish to think what we "had" was any different or better. Now you've thrown me in a pile with them. We should all get together and start a therapy group lol Or even better, write a tell all--proceeds going to an organization for women's emotional health. I hate the fact that you think you've gotten over on yet another person. You were always quick to describe someone else as an a**hole--another driver, a co-worker, etc. Well what about YOU??? Link to post Share on other sites
GeorgiaPeach1 Posted March 1, 2019 Share Posted March 1, 2019 I feel like such a fool. Link to post Share on other sites
Borntoelevate Posted March 3, 2019 Share Posted March 3, 2019 It’s been a while since I felt the need to write to you Nhu. I caved today and stalked your Facebook profile. I saw you changed your profile picture and cover photo. Your cover photo read “#ourcottagebelow”. The guy you are with is very lucky. I wish I had treated you better, I wish I knew how to appreciate you before you walked away. You are such a strong woman and I can see you becoming very successful. You know how to switch off the part of the brain that loved me. I’ve noticed that girls have a better ability than guys to do this, but having said that, you have a very strong capacity to do this. Truth be told though, I needed us to end and we needed to end. It was just how it ended that could have been better, but I needed to learn the lessons, the harsh lessons from the break up. It’s truly 1 full year now since we last kissed, had sex and held hands. I have lots of things to tell you about my life since we stopped talking. I am obviously still not over you but a lot has changed. I am now very musclar and lean, so much so, I am potentially going to enter a body building competition this year (honestly don’t know if I will though, but I have been asked by many guys if I will be competing). I am also well into my ISACA studies and am studying hard. I have also been dating several girls. The current one I am seeing is Thy. She cried today, saying she wanted to be my girlfriend. She’s a good girl, but I am unfortunately not attracted to her. The most important change though is you have matured me. You have humbled me, you have made me a better person (I hope). Aside from my parents and sister, you are next person to have had a profound impact on my life. I genuinely hope that I am forgetting you. Maybe I need a full two years, but what is for sure, I WILL get over you fully. I am more determined than ever to move on. Having said that, I will always love you Nhu. I will always have a soft spot for you. I can’t tell Thy I love her, because I don’t feel it. But Nhu, I love you. I always have since we met, regardless of how much post break up pain I’ve felt, and I will continue to love you, just not as intensely as time passes, as I achieve more and eventually, when I find that new Nhu to be with. Thank you for entering my life, hurting me so that I would change myself. I realised I wouldn’t have changed if I hadn’t been hurt so badly. It was better to have loved than to not have loved at all. All the best ok? Praying that you will have a better life than me. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
GeorgiaPeach1 Posted March 3, 2019 Share Posted March 3, 2019 I've been more or less doing ok, feeling better, until it hit me like a ton of bricks: even if you were to miss me, recognize YOU messed up too and want to return, I could never EVER trust you again. The way you walked out was cold-blooded and you didn't care that I'm a HUMAN BEING with feelings. If you've ever spent quality time with someone, had great times, been intimate, etc...there's just certain things you don't do out of common decency and respect. No one likes endings, but there's a big difference between a graceful exit and bulldozing your way out. One big lesson I've learned is that in the future, if I ever feel a man is doing the slow fade, I will bring my efforts to a screeching halt, do a 180 after reversing, a speed in the opposite direction. The days of me second guessing my intuition and being naive and overly trusting are GONE. I'm no longer the same person. Link to post Share on other sites
inflamed Posted March 4, 2019 Share Posted March 4, 2019 Today is day 10 full NC (including not checking your social media), day 22 since last contact (I fell into the birthday text trap because I was having a low moment and it happened to be your birthday) and day 1,425 since our final 'breakup' - though, by the end, I wasn't sure if we were even in a relationship anymore, or if the diminishing returns had reduced us to just sleeping together. Today I told my new therapist about you, and about what happened back then. I only had time to give a brief outline of the main bits - how enamoured I was in the beginning, your jealousy, my refusal to let go... how it split me down the middle between my rational side, which knew along what I needed to do, and the needy child side, whose demands always won out in the end. After the session, I cried because I remembered all the pain from that experience. Even though it's been nearly five years since we met, I've had to accept that some part of that experience still bothers me and brings me down. This is the case, despite my fantastic 2018 when I didn't contact you or check your social media once. Not once. Look, I don't want you back. Never, ever. I don't want you. I want you to get out of my head and to stop thinking about you whenever things go a bit wrong in my present, and much better, life. You re-created a struggle for me from my childhood, that's all it was, and by God I'm going to get to the bottom of it, process it, and let it go once and for all. One day, you're gonna be so far from my mind. Link to post Share on other sites
Realitysux Posted March 6, 2019 Share Posted March 6, 2019 (edited) You had 4 other children, one in foster care, you refer to the son in foster care as your son but our son as the boy. You have never taken any responsibility for your actions. I pity you to be honest. I am angry at myself for being so stupid and not telling you when I had the chance how selfish and dishonest you really are. I am fortunate that you are not in my life but absolutely disgusted that some women would be foolish enough to marry you. I spent day in and day out alone raising our son and you don't even give us financial support. Screw you! You don't deserve us in your life and are nothing but a waste of time. I don't regret you because my son is the best thing that happened to me, but I do regret not telling you what I really think of you when I had the chance. Edited March 6, 2019 by Realitysux Link to post Share on other sites
GeorgiaPeach1 Posted March 9, 2019 Share Posted March 9, 2019 I'm falling into the stage of depression. The days you're off are worse because I wonder whether (hope) you'll pop over. I've been reading about breakup stages for both dumper and dumpee, and I see that you're probably thrilled to be out of the relationship. You're probably hanging out with friends, going new places, and probably dating someone else. If I knew for sure you've slept with someone new, it would help me move on, but you aren't on social media. I just feel like a lost, sad little puppy. I have vacation coming up, but what's the point if I have no one to spend it with. I feel utterly alone while everyone I know seems to be in a happy, fun relationship, getting married, starting a family, etc. I want to move forward, but I just don't know how to go about it. Link to post Share on other sites
Madd_hatter Posted March 10, 2019 Share Posted March 10, 2019 Hey.. it’s me. It’s getting harder and harder to keep away. I miss you more than I can even describe. I wonder if you still think of me. A friend told me you were asking about me and I tried not to let it get to me but my heart almost exploded. I am trying to move on, Jason, but every little thing reignites that fire. I’ve never loved anyone the way I love you and I’m so scared of losing that. I would give almost anything to hear your voice. I wish you were still in my life. Everyone said letting you go would set me free, so how come I feel worse than I ever have before? Jason, what am I going to do without you? Please help me I don’t know what to do. I’m not happy. I’m so empty without you. I’m lost. Help me. Link to post Share on other sites
GeorgiaPeach1 Posted March 13, 2019 Share Posted March 13, 2019 I'm almost at 6 weeks NC, and my how things are changing fast. I no longer think it could be you when I get a message, nor am I terribly disappointed much anymore when I see it isn't. I don't wonder if you'll pop by much anymore. I'm not even sure now that I would get back with you if you wanted to. This is such a surprise because I've wanted things to go back for so long up until recently. When you first dumped me like a bag of trash, I was still thinking you were a catch. But now I'm realizing you were equally, if not more, responsible for the problems. I'm more clearly seeing your character flaws and issues. I'm understanding how you knew you weren't going to stick around, but you let me think you were committed to buy yourself time to emotionally get a jump start on the breakup. You set me up. Who does that? What has helped me is this forum and thread, crying when I need to get my emotions out, having a person or two I can talk to about it from time to time, making improvements to my life, getting rid of reminders about you such as old texts and pictures, the fact that you aren't on social media so I can't keep up with what you're doing, etc. I also remind myself of key indicators that our relationship sucked. You're becoming just another person instead of this guy worthy of a pedestal. Link to post Share on other sites
MeadowFlower Posted March 17, 2019 Share Posted March 17, 2019 (edited) Hi D_ _ _ _ ---- Edited March 17, 2019 by MeadowFlower Link to post Share on other sites
GeorgiaPeach1 Posted March 17, 2019 Share Posted March 17, 2019 I thought I was doing so much better, but I feel worse than before. Not only did you leave in a cold-blooded way, not only are you gone for good, but now I'm feeling like I'll never meet anyone else I can have a relationship with. If I were so awesome and attractive and successful, you wouldn't have ditched me. I have nowhere to go for me emotional, physical and sexual needs. You didn't even want my friendship or to be fwb. I feel completely undesirable and pathetic. I have no one to spend my vacation with anymore. All of the good things you were looking forward to in your life I've been completely shut out of. It's like there was never an us and you have it as if we never even met. Maybe you left me for good reason. I wouldn't stay with me, either. I'm beyond feeling depressed. I feel hopeless. Link to post Share on other sites
MeadowFlower Posted March 17, 2019 Share Posted March 17, 2019 @GeorgiaPeach, don't stay in this frame of mind for another moment. Shake yourself. Don't let the opinion of one measly guy get to you. It's just the opinion of a person. Get your mojo back without him and with or without any other person. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Greatlove Posted March 17, 2019 Share Posted March 17, 2019 #196916 REPLY He broke up with me…now what? Im 29 and he is 29. My boyfriend of almost 2 months broke up with me yesterday and he said that he felt like we didn’t have a mental connection. He said we can stay friends and I can call him but if not then that’s fine. I’m in a lot of pain right now I cried last night and this morning. I asked him so what’s really going on last night but he didn’t respond in text. I will be surprised if he calls me ever again. I’m so confused. What does he mean he doesn’t have a mental connection? He feels like he is not mentally attracted to me.. How do I get through this pain??? I’m told to wait until he contacts me. I only sent him one text after we broke up and he hasn’t replied. Link to post Share on other sites
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